Bravo's Party Party reality series unveiled its much-anticipated “gay weddings” episode at midnight on January 16th. The two “parties” documented in it were the same-sex commitment ceremonies of two different Florida gay newlywed couples, Steve and Joe of Miami and Jon and Jeff of Jacksonville. This was a thoroughly heart-warming and surprisingly enjoyable show to watch. Though not a big fan of wedding events or of institutional marriage in general, and ever leery of the ad nauseam parade of patronizingly processed “reality” TV shows, I found myself genuinely moved by the simple sincerity and down-to-earth family value sensibilities of these four very in-love gay men.

Party Party's purported premise is: “Each one-hour episode will explore the contrasting ways in which two very different families celebrate similar events”. The “contrast” generally boils down to economic differences, with one “party” extravagantly throwing a ton of cash at an event, and the other “party” modestly and mutedly doing the best they can. In other words, we are treated to watching the “haves” partying in comparison to the “have-nots” partying.

Although PP's exploitation of the different spending abilities of party throwers may have had some sensationalistic success in other episodes, such as ones that featured a “$10,000 princess party” or “the most magnificent Bat Mitzvah this side of Jerusalem,” the issue comes off as entirely irrelevant in the gay weddings episode.

Gay marriage is outlawed in Florida, and the thought of a high profile church wedding in such GLBT hostile territory was out of the question for the two “gay weddings” couples. Jeff and Jon held the more expensive of the two affairs at a hall in Alltel Stadium (home of the NFL's Jacksonville Jaguars), while Steve and Joe chose a more improvised, bohemian setting in an unused and somewhat run-down Miami theatrical space.

Both couples made the most of their situations with plenty of self-deprecating humor, innocent clowning and creative party planning. Steve and Joe even had to contend with having their home, neighborhood and planned wedding venue destroyed by one of Florida's many rampaging hurricanes. Yet they persevered and triumphed.

Given the remarkable circumstances of this ground breaking episode (in which a totally mainstream, middle American television show has the courage, intelligence and heart to openly acknowledge love and commitment between gay men in the same way it does for heteros), who cares how much the families spent! Voyeuristic issues regarding the trappings of affluence, taste in party-planning and/or money expenditure amounts pale in comparison to the deeper social significance of the gay wedding events themselves.

Kudos to Party Party for including queer wedding celebrations in its series' programming. Additionally, the entire Bravo network, with its myriad of friendly, inclusive “queers-are-people-too” reality shows is to be commended for helping to normalize gay-straight relations via its honest portrayal of gays in society.

By way of a reality TV “reality” check, gay viewers should know that the “gay wedding” episode of Party Party, just like the series' other episodes (and most likely just like all “reality” TV programming), contains a considerable amount of scripting and manipulative staging by its producers.

The filmed results we end up seeing on these shows are thus not as authentic as they were “in reality.” Supposedly “candid” interviews are often re-shot and guests may be coached to express stronger, more sensationalistic reactions. Viewers would be surprised to learn just how well non-actors can realistically emote on cue in order to gain their 15 minutes of fame.

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