Gay Partners Ted and Drew Brave The Great American Christmas

AE: Can you talk about your impressions from your visit to your old grade school in the film?
Drew: Walking through the school and seeing the desks — it was just like my own grade school. The main thing for me was meeting all these teachers that Ted had talked about for years. They were kind to him and he felt safe in school. And I thought, “These are the people who got him through some rough times in his childhood.”

Ted: I loved being in their classrooms. I loved them. My parents were divorcing when I was 3, so going to school was a safe haven for me. I could escape home. No matter where you are — no matter how small or big the town — love just seems to melt everything away — all the hate, all the judgment … [crying] You can’t hate someone who loves you.

AE: Did the Christmas experience cause any kind of catharsis for your relatives? Are they are now more accepting of you both?
Ted: Well, my mom just phoned and asked me to give her Drew’s Christmas wish list for this year. On the other hand, I was talking to my brother’s wife the other day on the phone, and she said that last Christmas was their worst Christmas ever. So [laughs] it’s all uphill from here!

AE: She [your sister] said this because you brought Drew home for Christmas?
Ted: Yes.

Drew: It was probably because of all the drama in setting up the filming — all the phone calls — people getting hysterical. Filming Ted’s family as we tried to get them to participate in this film would have been a good reality show in itself. It was unreal.

Ted: My parents did not want to do the show or sign the release. Here in L.A. everyone wants to be on TV. Anyone here would jump at the chance.

AE: It can be difficult for families to be asked, “What do you think about your son or brother being gay?” on national television.
Drew: I agree with you. Also, in that rural culture, people are just not as vocal. They only want their name in the paper when they are born or when they die.

Ted: You are asking your family to put their private holiday in front of everyone. You are asking them to put their whole Christian faith on the line for people to see. … On top of that, you are putting what the country thinks is this huge sin [homosexuality] — like icing on Christmas as on a cookie.

It had all the possibilities of being The Nightmare Before Christmas. It could have been the worst experience ever. As we lived it, we were all scared that that was going to happen at any moment — it could all fall apart. But I think that feeling would have been there even if the cameras were not there. I think my family was afraid of finally meeting the person I have chosen. I think they are glad it’s done.

AE: At the end of the film, after you both drive off for the airport, your brother breaks down in tears. Did you know about that?
Ted: My brother met up with me after the cameras left and said, “ I just love you so much,” and I said, “I know, I know.” He did this right in from of his kids, and I was so proud of that. [Crying.] It shows he is a good role model for his children. He showed that no matter what happens between brothers, they love each other. It wasn’t caught on camera, but that’s OK. It was a moment for me and my brother and my family to have on our own.

AE: Do you have a message for gay men who will be bringing someone home for the first time?
Drew: I decided when going into this that I was not going to let anyone else’s prejudices or homophobia impact on how the holiday would turn out for me and Ted. I enrolled myself in making sure everything went as smooth as possible and we had a good time. I was looking out for Ted’s well-being to make sure he wasn’t pulled into a really bad situation.

Ted: Listen to what your family members have to say. It isn’t just about you. It’s about your family, too. Listen, listen, listen!

Drew: [Laughs.] And if you can do it without cameras following you, it will be a little easier!

AE: By the way, Drew, did you ever get to finish baking that Christmas key lime pie for Ted’s family? In the film, you get pulled away in the middle of making it and we never know how it turned out.
Drew: Yes! [Laughs.] I got to finish making it, and it came out great!

The Great American Christmas airs on USA
on Tuesday, Nov. 28, 2006, at 9 p.m. EST.