Glee recap (1.08): "Mash-Up"

So the show opens with my favorite line of the whole episode, a hysterical Mercedes flinching away from a passing slushie while yelping, "My weave!" For you see...the Slushie War has commenced. Mercedes is not the target of its icy slap, however. Nor is Rachel. It's meant for...Finn. He and Quinn have lost their cool quotient thank to glee club and the news that Quinn is preggers.

Okay, it makes sense for Quinn to maybe lose some cool points, but when has getting a girl knocked up ever hurt a jock's status? Wouldn't that make him more of man in his teammate's eyes? Or maybe times have just changed since I was in school. I mean it has been...well, let's not discuss that. Whatever. This is Glee. Nothing ever makes sense. And that's why I love it. If we made a drinking game out of this show, taking a shot every time there was a plot hole or character inconsistency...well, we'd all end up in the hospital, but it would sure be fun for a while. Yes? No?

Emma and Ken can't agree on a wedding song (for their secret wedding being held in Hawaii...far away from people who know them). She wants "I Could Have Danced All Night" and he wants..."The Thong Song." Stay classy, Ken. They ask Will to make them a mash-up and teach Emma how to dance. Because that's just what Ken would want to do since he's been trying so hard to keep them apart. Bottoms up. Take a shot...

Mash-ups are the theme of the evening, so Shu is also challenging the glee kids to create a mash-up using his favorite song..."Bust A Move." Really? Is that anyone's favorite song in the real world? Really? It's actually just an excuse to have Will sing another hip hop song and show off his dance skills...which are impressive, I'll give him that. He really can bust a move. (Get it?) Still, there's something rather icky about having a teacher sing lyrics like, "a chick walks by, you wish you could sex her" to his female students. Inappropriate much? Do another shot. Kurt's horrified expression sums it all up. The scene ends with a close-up ass shot of Matthew Morrison. Okay. All better now.

Emma shows up for her first dance lesson in a monstrosity of a wedding dress. Apparently, she and her cousin Betty (is that an Ugly Betty reference? Jayme did used to be in that show too) were obsessed with Princess Di's wedding...hence the twenty foot long train. Will sings "The Thong Song." Worst. Song. EVAR! Not even he can make it good. Then they fall over and she lands on top of him.

Ken is watching creepily in the background and jealousy rears its ugly head. At football, he adds a mandatory practice that is "coincidentally" at the same time as glee club rehearsal, and tells the guys they have to make a choice: It's glee club or football.