Torchwood Episode 206 Recap: "Reset"

Rejoining the tour already in progress, Martha picks up an object and wonders what it is. Jack warns her that it’s an alien artifact so she should handle it with care, which I’m eager to see since it would be a first in the history of the Hub, given people more typically treat alien artifacts with all the delicacy of airport luggage handlers.

Case in point: Owen says he’s been trying to figure out what the object does — something having to do with “concentrated, destructive energy” — and picks it up to demonstrate. It looks uncannily like an ear probe grafted to an iPhone, which means that by the time he figures out how to work it, at least three new versions will have come out, each one smaller, cheaper, and less infuriating than the last.

He points the EarPhone at a cup, inside of which he’s placed a crumpled piece of paper. The EarPhone screen shows an X-ray image of the paper inside the cup, then shoots a laser beam across the room that misses the cup completely and hits perilously close to the Ianto family jewels. And if you want to talk about concentrated, destructive energy, you should see the lightning bolts darting from Ianto’s eyes into Owen’s skull in response.

Ianto has come in to inform them that there’s been another “assault by hypodermic,” but this time the victim, a woman, survived and is in the hospital.

Cut to the Hospital. Martha swabs and jabs at a young woman, who says she thought she was finished with the doctors. Martha replies, “We’re different.” I’m sure that’s comforting; who doesn’t want to be poked and prodded by a self-professed non-doctor?

The woman describes what happened, saying a big guy came toward her with a big needle, then her dog bit him and she kicked him in the nuts. Well, that makes things easy; now all they need to do is look for a guy with teeth marks on his arms, and balls the size and color of rutabagas.

Jack’s response to her display of bravado is to say “Respect,” an expression I’m sorry to say he can’t pull off in the slightest, like back on The Today Show when Katie Couric would try to be all street and say things like, “What the 411 girlfriend?” during interviews.

Back at the lab, Martha and Owen playfully do science-y things with test tubes and beakers all to music, like they’re reenacting the washing the dishes scene from The Big Chill. Then Owen starts asking her about her relationship with Jack. Meowww! Cat fight coming! Watch out, Martha, this feral cat’s never been neutered.

Martha wonders why the killer is injecting ammonium hydroxide, which she thinks is a “weird way to kill someone,” as if killers are all such paragons of logical reasoning. Why not ask the Son of Sam’s dog what he has to say on the subject? Owen says it’s kind of like using bleach, which leads Martha to brainstorm that the objective isn’t to kill but also to destroy evidence.

TW Conference Room. Jack recaps what they know about the victims, then assigns teams to handle the criminal and medical aspects of the investigation. While the teams are out following orders, Tosh contacts Ianto to tell him another body has been found with the same “hallmarks” as the others. So now the killer’s sending greeting cards announcing his attacks? “Roses are red, the sun’s in the sky, here’s a big, pointy needle right in your eye.”

Ianto and Gwen trek through the woods to the crime scene, freely plowing over and destroying whatever evidence is in their path. A CSI-guy tells them the victim is a student, and Gwen makes herself right at home, pushing him aside to go pry open the dead guy’s eye and look for the hypodermic mark. Bingo.

A discussion at TW HQ leads them to agree this is just like the other attacks, all of which are disturbingly “professional.” Gwen wonders who would want to assassinate a student. Martha snarks, “Student loan companies.” I was going to suggest anyone who’s ever taught an undergraduate writing workshop, but that’s just my own experience talking.