Ugly Betty Episode 202 Recap: “Family Affair”

Betty walks by, telling Christina she’s got to find Daniel to tell him Wili’s bonking the bodyguard. I honestly don’t know why she’s so upset about this. Dwayne’s job, after all, is to protect Wilhelmina. He clearly decided the best place to defend her was from deep inside the perimeter. Of her vagina.

Before Betty can say anything to Daniel, she runs right into Marc, who tells her, quite ominously, that Wili wants to see her. Right away. On the roof. Dum dum dum.

Mode Rooftop. Betty comes out the door and onto the roof, and it’s teeming with mannequins. It looks like she’s stepped into a bad 1970s album cover, probably for Supertramp or Steely Dan.

I know storage is tough to come by in Manhattan, but that’s really the only place in the whole building they could keep the extra mannequins? And what’s a fashion magazine doing with all those mannequins anyway? Don’t magazines usually show the clothes on, oh I don’t know, actual people?

All these gripes don’t matter, though, because it looks freakin’ cool. It’s the perfect backdrop for Betty’s showdown with Wili, who calls out, “I believe you lost something,” to a CRASH OF THUNDER. Betty looks up and sees the sky is clear, then notices Mark behind her making the fire and brimstone sound effects with a sheet of tin like in an old-time radio show. Like the mannequins, it’s totally random and makes no sense, but it’s also so incredibly funny there’s no way I’m going to snark on it. I love this show, and I love Marc and Wili.

Wili: You surprise me, Betty. Stealing my keys. Breaking into my apartment. Taking the book. Good for you. You’re growing.

Wili has a deal for Betty. She knows her father is stuck in Mexico, but Wili’s own father, a U.S. senator, can get him a visa. But Betty is confused.

Wili: Come on, girl. I’m black, you’re Mexican. Let’s not talk around it like a couple of dull white people. Keep your mouth shut, and your old man goes home.

In all seriousness, I think Wili’s got an excellent point here. Why should Betty be so loyal to the Meades anyway? Alexis and Daniel are a bunch of spoiled, privileged crybabies who treat the magazine like their family-owned mom-and-pop grocery. They’ve done nothing to make the magazine what it is — certainly much less than Wili or Betty do on any given day — and barely show up for work as it is.

What’s more, Betty has an opportunity here to help her beloved father who is in true jeopardy, while no real harm is going to come to anyone by her keeping her mouth shut about Wili’s horizontal cardio workout with her very personal trainer. Wili and Bradford aren’t even married yet, and even if they were, after cheating on Judith Light with a freakish stick-figure harpie like Fey, Bradford deserves whatever miserable sham of a marriage he gets into.

Wili tells Betty she has until the end of the day to decide. On the way back into the building, a distraught Betty bumps into Henry and rather harshly snaps, “What’s up, buddy?” before elbowing him into a clothes rack.