Ugly Betty Episode 206 Recap: “Something Wicked This Way Comes”

Oh, right. Wicked. Some boring scene on stage without singing. Now it’s Rico trying to put the moves on Betty. She pushes him off but then notices Daniel watching so she grabs his arm again.

Henry sees all this and, furious, texts her to meet him the lobby. Henry wants to know what Rico’s up to and why Betty seems to be enjoying it so much. Betty responds he doesn’t get to be jealous, given he got another girl pregnant. Ooooh! Good one. He is so going to lose every argument they ever have throughout their lives with that one, isn’t he? It’s going to be like, “It’s your turn to do the laundry. You got another girl pregnant!”

But then Henry gets all sad and says she’s not the only one who’s eventually going to get their heart broken.

Meanwhile, in the Mode ladies room, Amanda is grilling Marc about Cliff, who he acknowledges is not his usual type. It’s true. Cliff actually has a brain and a personality. Marc talks about all the sweet things Cliff does, like writing poems and leaving them on the bathroom mirror, and making his belly button talk in a funny voice they call “Mr. Guttley.” Wow, I guess I don’t love everything about Cliff. That’s the first thing about him that’s actually made me kind of sick.

Marc: What do I do? Let him go just because he doesn’t use product? That stupid belly button makes me laugh … I don’t want to wind up sad and alone like Wilhelmina.

I’m sure Cliff would be thrilled to know Marc views dating him as edging out the prospect of dying alone.

Since Marc and Amanda have apparently never watched a TV show in their lives and don’t know any better, they don’t think to check the stalls before having this little gossip-fest. So of course we hear a flush and Wilhelmina comes out right on cue. Without a word, she washes her hands and walks out, leaving a terrified Marc behind.

Back in Wili’s office, Marc offers up pork rinds, perhaps the world’s most repulsive snack food, as a peace offering. She tells him they’re done for the night, but then actually opens up to him, admitting she was hoping Nico would change her mind about coming.

“And you’re wrong about me being alone,” she says. “I have hundreds of backstabbing, two-faced friends who are pouring in from all over the globe for the wedding. Any of them would be thrilled to be maid of honor at my wedding.” And she picks up the phone and calls one of the two-faced backstabbers in person, BFF “Vicky” Beckham.

But first, she asks Marc who he’s bringing to the wedding.

Marc: I get a “plus one”?
Wili: I wouldn’t want you to be sad and alone.

Marc goes to his desk and picks up the phone. He calls Cliff and says, “I really screwed up.” Got that right. I hope Cliff makes him buy him something shockingly expensive before taking him back.

Cut to a montage set to the wistful music of “I’m Not That Girl” from Wicked. And to give you the right effect, this part of the recap perfectly syncs up with the song, so get out your Wicked CD and play the song while you read along. Oh, and it also works with the second track of Dark Side of the Moon and the fourth track of Color Me Barbra. Press play … NOW!