Ugly Betty Episode 210 Recap: “Bananas for Betty”

Cut to a montage inside some bar with spicy music and spicier dancing. Rico and a drunken Hilda call Henry and Betty over. Rico offers to buy everybody a round of “flaming pelicans.” And here I thought only penguins were gay. This leads to more macho posturing between Henry and Rico, who at this point should just whip them out on the table and compare sizes. Maybe it’s time for me to start another letter-writing campaign.

Betty insists that Henry needs something flaming to help him loosen up. If that’s what he needs, then I humbly offer up myself. Then Rico and Hilda get up for some dance floor foreplay, while Betty and Henry sit in unhappy silence watching them.

Cut to a scene from Saving Daniel’s Privates. Daniel crouches with his team behind Betty’s desk and makes the “watch me” gesture that Robert DeNiro does in Meet the Parents, only gayer. Then they’re ambushed, and the camera-work gets all Matrixy as everybody leaps and spins and gets shot in artful slo-mo.

Daniel finds Amanda clutching a mannequin torso, bemoaning the damage to poor innocent clothes.

Amanda: I know I should feel something. But I felt nothing. War has changed me.

Daniel tells her to hang in there. He shot somebody from Alexis’ team in the ladies’ room, and somebody else went home bored. That means only Alexis and Deputy Leo are left.

Cut to a taxi pulling up in front of Wili’s building. Wili assumes the “stalkerazzi” gathered outside have heard about the launch of Slater. But when she offers to answer questions, she’s taken aback that they all want to know why she viciously attacked Betty White.

Inside, she and Marc watch Fashion Buzz in horror, as Alec Mapa shows the cellphone footage of Wili slamming the door on Betty White. He mentions that the clip is all over YouTube. Marc, on the verge of tears, wonders how Wili could do such a thing to a national treasure.

Wili: Well obviously I didn’t know it was Betty White. I’m not a monster. I just thought it was some old woman in the rain.

Marc goes to check out the YouTube clip, and not only has it been viewed 50,000 times in the last hour, but “some queens even remixed it to a dance song.” It’s the rare TV show that would be savvy enough to mention that something like this would inevitably result from Wili’s little run-in. But it’s the truly brilliant show that then goes ahead and shows you the clip.

Cut to leopard-print FMPs cha-cha-cha-ing away. It’s Hilda, of course. And she and Rico are steaming up the dance floor, while Betty tries to get Henry to give it a try. It might be fun, she says.