AfterElton.com - First Comes Love Puts Gay Weddings First

A gay broadcaster, covering San Francisco Pride 2005, noted that the parade, which the previous year was a hotbed for in-your-face gay marriage activism from gays and lesbians on both sides of the issue, was now all about family. Gay conservatives must have rejoiced that we had finally opted for the “if you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em” approach to the legalization of gay marriage, which the gay mainstream initially called for, hoping to convince our government to pass legislation in our favor with honey, rather than those vinegary protests and defiant same-sex weddings.

Still, gay liberals and moderates can agree on one thing: the necessity of the recently launched gay network Logo’s most talked about new reality show First Comes Love, which furthers the gay marriage cause by putting a face to the loaded issue on television screens across the country.

An adaptation of a Canadian reality show titled My Fabulous Gay Wedding, hosted by out actor/comedian Scott Thompson of The Kids in the Hall fame, and wedding planner Fern Cohen, the series aims to fulfill the wedding dreams of gay and lesbian couples in a mere two weeks.

The first episode traced the nuptials of two divorced lesbians, Debbie and Nikki, who met five years ago and want to make their match official. The episode successfully demonstrates the obstacles that marriage-minded same-sex couples still face, as one of the brides struggles with the question of whether her own children will be allowed to attend the ceremony by her objecting ex-husband.

In another episode, two men, Rob and Greg, who’d been shacking up together for seven years, cried their way through their marriage vows in matching Scottish kilts, and in the episode coming up ("Dan and Mischa"), a drama teacher and an ad executive in love since their early 20's finally tie the knot.

While these moments might bring a tear to our eyes, is it enough? The show is never overtly political, underscored by the fact that its Canadian title, My Fabulous Gay Wedding, was changed to the more anodyne First Comes Love, once the show moved over from our gay marriage-approving country to the north. According to the AP, a network flack explained that “the title wasn’t changed to sidestep controversy, but rather to better reflect a show about relationships.” (Somehow the word “wedding” doesn’t?)

But simply having a show like this on the air is political in some sense.

Reality shows revolving around weddings have saturated television for several years now, but they've always been strictly confined to heterosexual couples. 30 years ago, before same-sex unions were ever dreamed of, gay television meant the Uncle Arthur character on Bewitched, or even worse, the Jack Tripper character on Three’s Company, who pretended to be gay so he could move into a conservatively-managed apartment complex where men and women couldn’t share housing unless they were married.

More recently we’ve witnessed the extremes of campy makeovers on Bravo’s Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, the stereotypical characters on NBC’s Will & Grace, the super sluts-turned-politicos on Showtime’s Queer as Folk, and the occasional three-dimensional gay TV characters like the women on Buffy and The L Word, or the gay men on Six Feet Under.

It was MTV who initially paved the way for more honest, politically-minded representations of queer people in the reality genre. Who can forget the same-sex smooch heard around the world on MTV’s early reality show Sex in the 90s, and season after season of gay lip-locking on the music channel’s long-running docu-soap The Real World?

So it made sense that Viacom, MTV’s parent company, should launch Logo, the premiere gay network, offering more than 200 lesbian and gay films, concerts, newscasts, and ongoing documentary series as part of the basic cable lineup, in 13 million homes last June (and eventually headed for 40 million homes, according to Logo spokesperson David Bittler).

Will First Comes Love represent the diversity within the gay and lesbian community, or merely acquiesce to the homosexual mainstream, advertisers, or worst of all, the right wing? More importantly, while the show clearly furthers the gay marriage debate, does it actually hit viewers over the head with the point that we are entitled to make honest men and women of each other?

Tune in to the next new episode on Aug. 29 at 9:00 p.m. to decide for yourself.