AfterElton.com - "Queer as Folk" Episode 5.08

Queer As Folk recap: Season Five, Episode Eight
(original air date 3 July 2005)

THIS WEEK'S QAF FAQ:

Is Brian really going to give in to all the pressure to "grow up"?
I can't even think about it. It's a travesty.
Why won't Lindsay just get down on her knees and beg already?
My, wouldn't that be fun!
What did Deb's T-shirt say?
"I don't repeat gossip, so you'd better listen close."

The countdown — Brian and Hot New Guy are fucking. No, they're not fucking each other — they're fucking the guys on their lists of 10 hot guys.

Woody's — Hot New Guy has fucked 6. Surprise, surprise, so has Brian.

Brian says they may be even, but they'll never be equal. Sigh. There's something about this that's just sad, when it should be fun and sexy.

Justin's new place -- Michael is helping Justin move a bed up 18 flights of stairs. Justin doesn't have a bathroom or a stove, but otherwise his new place is cool and bohemian. You know, "bohemian" in the sense of "disgusting."

Michael and Justin seem to be buddies now. Ew.

Deb's place -- Emmett has a stalker -- or at least somebody who keeps calling and hanging up. Carl thinks Deb and Em are jumping to conclusions and it's probably no big deal. He advises Em to just keep his eyes open, but Deb has another tip:

Deb: "You get yourself one of those pepper sprays so you can blast the bastard."

Lindsay and Melanie's house — Mel is reading about Proposition 14 on her laptop. Lindsay has brought her some tea, and is interested in what's on the laptop — mostly because in order to read it, she'll just have to get thisclose to Mel. What's a girl to do?

The doorbell rings, interrupting their almost-snuggly moment. It's that weed Michael, there to pick up J.R. and to whine and do whatever the hell else he usually does.

As Mel goes to get J.R., she hands Linds the teacup and says "Perfect blend of cream and honey, as usual."

Subtle.

Michael asks Linds if things are back to normal. She says not quite; she and Mel are just having an "in-house separation." Haha. To borrow a quote from The L Word, "you are SO gay!"

So they're sharing chores and child care, but living totally separate lives, and it's working rather well in Lindsay's estimation. Yeah, admit it: it's all about the cream and honey.

Kinnetik -- Ted is trying to get Brian to go out for blowfish or mango martinis. Brian figures Ted is angling for a raise, but Ted says he's just trying to be understanding about the breakup. He tells Brian to quit foolin' around: "You've gotta free yourself of this burden. Release it. Let it all hang out." Brian just gives him a look.

Brian: "My mother was a frigid bitch. My father was an abusive drunk. They had a hateful marriage. Which is probably why I am unwilling or unable to form a long-term, committed relationship of my own. The fact that I drink like a fish, abuse drugs and have more or less redefined promiscuity doesn't help much. As a result, I've lost the two people in my life that mean the most to me."
Ted: "There. Don't you feel better?"
Brian: "No. But I'm sure you do."

I wish I could capture the sleek sarcasm with which Brian said those lines.

Number 9 shows up to distract Brian from his fake sorrows.

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