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Davis immediately scurries upstairs to tattle to Jenn. He just can't wait to tell her what Alex said. Great. So in one episode, thirty minutes minus commercials, Davis has managed to embody three negative gay stereotypes: the promiscuous gay boy, the attention whore, and now he's a drama queen trying to stir up the sparks of drama — or at least fan the flames. No, Davis, you will not be eligible for the coveted 2007 Queer of the Year award. Besides, I think T.R. Knight already has that one tied up with a Tiffany blue ribbon. (BTW, that's a good thing folks.) Jenn furiously storms downstairs to confront Alex. As she leaves, Colie tells Davis he shouldn't have told Jenn that.

Alex is still coaching Stephen on the Ways of the Jerk when Jenn appears and lights into him. She finds him disgusting. As do we all. He immediately starts lying, saying he never told Stephen to say anything about her father. He looks like the clichéd deer caught in headlights. She doesn't believe him. As she rants, she slowly starts to break down. It's kind of painful to watch. There's real hurt there. She runs off to Davis for comfort as Alex runs outside to... cry? Really? What exactly is he crying about?

Tyrie attempts to comfort Alex, but I can't even understand what he's mumbling about and I have closed captioning. Alex admits to Tyrie that he did tell Stephen some things to mention to hurt Jenn, and he might have mentioned her father, but he would never say anything like that to her! Oh my goodness, no! He's all injured innocence. I hate him. He then has the gall to say Jenn took it out of context. I hate men. No, not really. Just the men on this stupid show.

Alex ends by telling Tyrie, "I'm really upset right now. Not because of how bad Jenn feels or whatever happened tonight, but just because, like, it's so frustrating how long it's going to take to rebuild that trust and that relationship." Huh? I think these kids are on crack.

Alex finds Stephen in the office. They both feel bad, as well they should, but neither is accepting any responsibility. That seems to be a reoccurring theme on this show. Alex is still trying that whole Jenn took it out of context bull and Stephen is still acting like she just made the cheating thing up from whole cloth. They just can't figure out how to fix it. I have an idea. How about you both act like men and admit you were wrong. Then try growing up. See how that works for ya.

But no, those are just the pipe dreams of an idealistic writer. Things will "work out" before the night is over — not because anyone makes any sense or acts maturely or responsibly, but just because this show has to have a happy ending each week like some long lost episode of Full House.

The next day, the girls are discussing the previous night's excitement while eating at some cute little outdoor café. Jenn acknowledges that Davis might be a bit of an instigator — she seems to be responding to something Colie said — but based on Alex's reaction when she confronted him, she thinks Davis was telling the truth. The girls all agree that Jenn was justified in her reaction.

Back at the house, Alex calls his mommy. She assures him that he's doing everything all right. Okay. This is precisely how we get these idiotic young adults who can't take responsibility for their own actions. You have these permissive parents who constantly tell their kids nothing is their fault, and there's no such thing as failure, and all that other "affirming" new-age bullcrap. Don't misunderstand me, I believe in positive reinforcement and all, but we're turning out a generation of spoiled wusses who believe they can do no wrong.

Anyway, reassured of his worth by his mommy, Alex goes to make amends with Jenn. He spouts some psychobabble about how he's afraid of her and they need to repair their relationship for the sake of the house. There's a lot more sickening dialogue, but all you really need to know is that Jenn laps up the positive male attention the same way she always does. As Alex is saying, "Maybe I can't defend you the way Ty can..." she leaps to her feet, throws her arms around him, and finished his sentence with, "...but you can love me!" It's kind of sad really. Girl needs some hardcore therapy. Especially considering Alex was just going to say, "Maybe I can't defend you the way Ty can, but I can, like, open your sodas and stuff."

Just when I think we're past the worst, I remember that this after school special from hell isn't over. Jenn still has to make up with Stephen. Are you ready for this? She goes and apologizes to him. For calling him out on his cheating. And he just sits there and nods approvingly, as if he's so glad she finally came around. HATE!

This show is so messed up it's not even funny. These people are idiots. Complete and total morons. I feel dumber for just having watched that. I think I need a shower.

Next week! Colie is told by the powers that be at Outward Bound to stay away from Adam, but Colie is outraged that she's not allowed to bone her coworker. It looks like they might be having a clandestine romance. I hope she gets fired. And falls off a cliff. Also, Princess Brooke is whining some more about having to go back out to the woods for the second half of their training. I hope she falls off a cliff, too. And gets eaten by a bear. No, wait. That would be cruel to the bear. See you next week!

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