After the tasteful ceremony attended only by their parents, Sir Elton and David were greeted outside by hundreds of well-wishers.

English tabloids are not known for losing graciously. If they can’t cover Sir Elton’s wedding, then they can damned well cover his divorce. Reports are that The Sun is already making up stories that David has been seen cavorting nude on a yacht in the Caribbean with Robbie Williams, Ricky Martin, and Tom Cruise. We can neither confirm nor deny this.

WHO WOULD HAVE GUESSED A GAY MAN WAS BEHIND IT?
The always hip newspaper, the Seattle Times (you remember “old” media, right?), is continuously WAY ahead of the pop-culture curve. Earlier this year, they reported that American Idol was a television sensation, and now they are reporting that there is a hot new blog out there going by the moniker Pink is the New Blog.

I, of course, being endlessly hip and up-to-date already knew about Pink and you can’t prove otherwise. Pink, devoted pretty much to nothing but celebrities, consists mostly of a bunch of photos with graphics and snarky comments superimposed on them. Britney Spears, Jake Gyllenhaal, and Paris Hilton are Pink’s current subjects of interest. Imagine my shock then when I learned that Pink’s creator, Trent Vanegas, is a gay man! Celebrity-obsessed, Britney Spears, snarky comments—how could I have ever figured that out on my own? And, no, I’m not being mean because I actually have to write columns while Trent scribbles on a bunch of photos.

Say, how much are digital cameras anyway?

THE E! MUST STAND FOR EXCEPTIONALLY STUPID
Because that’s what the E! Network is for dumping Kathy Griffin from their red-carpet award’s show coverage. According to the NY Post, E!’s people told Kathy’s people to tell Kathy “That the E! red carpet is a puzzle and I am a piece of the puzzle, which is a wonderful puzzle piece, but I don't fit this particular puzzle and that when I see the puzzle, I will get it. I am a piece that doesn't understand only because they can't tell me who will take over.”

On the plus side, Ms. Griffin is not only filming a second-season of her show, My Life on the D-List, but is trying to work things out with hubby, Matt. I just saw Kathy’s latest DVD, Allegedly, this week and it bummed me knowing that her marriage with Matt had busted up on the rocks of the cruel Hollywood coast. After all, if they can’t make it, then what hope is there for Sir Elton and David?

BROKEBACKBROKEBACKBROKEBACKBROKEBACKBROKEBACK
McDonald’s today announced a movie tie-in promotion with Brokeback Mountain. Happy meals will come with an assortment of action figures from the gay cowboy flick. Figures include Ennis, Jack, their horses, estranged wives, as well as a bunch of sheep. The GOT MILK campaign also signed up Jake and Heath to pose in their cowboy gear. I’m a little concerned about those “milk” mustaches though. Finally, Hasbro announced the release of My Little Brokeback Doll, which comes with a variety of outfits for the doll’s closet from which the doll will never emerge.

With all the attention Brokeback Mountain is getting these days, I wouldn’t be terribly surprised if any of the above did happen. Now the inevitable Brokeback Backlash is under way. I’ve worried for a while that all the awards tossed at the flick will make the Motion Picture Academy bored with the movie by the time Oscar nominations come around. My fingers are crossed that isn’t the case.

Wingnuts held their fire for a while, but since all their predictions of box-office doom have not come to pass, they just can’t control themselves any longer. Uber-oily conservative movie critic Michael Medved appeared on Bill O’Reilly’s show to say a bunch of nasty stuff. And some Catholic wingnuts were all perturbed because a Catholic website dared to praise the movie. The review stayed up, but the reviewer took his name off it, and the recommendation rating was changed from “All Right for Adults” to “Will Turn You To Salt,” or some such nonsense.

But there is some thoughtful criticism out there. I found this essay over at TheSimon.com. I still haven’t seen Brokeback (houses are cheap in backwaters, but there are serious drawbacks) so I can’t comment too much on Russell Brown’s critique of the movie.

But he did give voice to one doubt I’ve had about the flick; it is yet another Hollywood tale about tortured gay love lived in the closet and—SPOILER ALERT—ending in tragedy. We’ve been seeing that storyline almost since Thomas Edison powered up the first kinetoscope, and I could do without seeing it again. Hollywood filmmakers change book endings all the time. Why couldn’t have Jack and Ennis have founded a gay dude-ranch in Colorado and lived happily ever after?

BTW, Brokeback is doing so well, its distributors have decided to take it wider, faster. And it did boffo box-office in conservative areas of Texas and Illinois where Passion of the Christ was a huge hit. Go figure.

THIS WEEK ON DVD
Regarding Billy tells the story of a gay guy charged with taking care of his developmentally disabled brother. At the same time he must deal with his romantic feelings toward his childhood best-friend who has just returned from Iraq. Will they find true love? Will I write about Brokeback again next week? What do you think?

Finally, TLA Video is hawking, I mean, presenting their Top Ten Videos of 2005 at a low, low price just for you.

Now I’ll shut up so you can have the BEST.GAY.WEEK.EVER!

That's it for this week! Check back next Friday for a new installment of Best. Gay. Week. Ever., or read previous installments here.