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I actually know something about being a gay role model. Back in 1990, I helped found one of the nation's first support groups for GLBTQ youth. We went from zero to a hundred and fifty members in a matter of months.

And almost every single one of those a hundred and fifty young people saw me as a role model.

Why wouldn't they? There were no other roles models in the world back then, except maybe Richard Simmons and the latest celebrity dying of AIDS. So when these kids looked ahead at their futures as adults, either way they saw something pretty scary.

But when they looked at me, a reasonably happy guy in a happy long-term relationship, they could finally see themselves, and their own futures.

At first it made me uncomfortable, the idea of little old me as a role model. But then I realized how vitally important it was to these kids, and I remembered how I wished there'd been some kind of role model in my life as a teenager.

Meanwhile, being one of the leaders of this youth group, I was often called upon to be an emissary to the straight world on the whole issue of GLBTQ youth rights. This was harder, because a lot of those straight people were pretty hostile. But I cared a lot about the issue, so I was willing to do what I had to do.

Those are really the only requirements for being a gay role model: be a visible, reasonably responsible figure in the lives of young GLBTQ kids, and in the face of disapproving heterosexual adults.

So with that in mind, I have some advice for both George Michael and Lance Bass.

George, sorry, you don't have what it takes to be a role model. Sure, your private life is your own, and the paparazzi are worthless scum.

But you're rich and famous, with every possible luxury and advantage. Is it really asking too much that you keep your pants on when you're out in public?

That said, what really disqualifies you from being a role model isn't so much your promiscuity as your defense of it, equating promiscuity with gay “culture.” Not only can I not imagine anything further from the truth, it just confirms one of the worst stereotypes about us. And, let's face it, talk like that is just disastrous P.R. for our movement -- sort of like if Rosa Park had been caught smoking crack.

And Lance? I'm tired of gay celebrities who say they don't want to be the “gay poster child.” Who's asking you to be?

Being a role model doesn't mean being perfect. It simply means being aware of the incredible power and potential of your celebrity.

You're rich and famous, Lance. Would it kill you to do a benefit or two for GLSEN? Would it destroy you to acknowledge your young GLBTQ fans by--gasp!--marching in a gay pride parade? By coming out in such a graceful and dignified way (and not by, say, being caught jerking off in front of an undercover cop in a public restroom) you're already a role model of sorts whether you admit it or not. That's really all being a role means anyway.

Well, that and keeping your pants on when you're out in public.

And that is the last gay word.

Last Gay Word columnist Brent Hartinger is the author of the gay teen novel, Geography Club, which is currently being adapted for the movies. The sequel, The Order of the Poison Oak, is just out in paperback, and his latest novel, Grand & Humble, is in stores now. Explore "Brent's Brain," his website, at www.brenthartinger.com.

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