Q: Oh, Great Monkey, bestow upon us your wisdom: Who do you think is the hottest male TV duo of all time? – Rich, New York, NY

A: At first blush, this might seem like a difficult question. After all, there are plenty of examples of TV duos for whom the expression “the hot one” has no meaning, because both members of the team are totally hot.

So, gay subtext or not, which is the hottest TV duo of all time? Starsky and Hutch? Brandon and Dylan? Angel and Wesley? Crockett and Tubbs? Batman and Robin? The guys from Adam-12? The Lone Ranger and Tonto? The Dukes of Hazzard? Kirk and Spock?

Good-looking men, all. Alas, when it comes to the hottest TV duo of all time, it’s not even a contest. The winner—by far—is Supernatural’s Sam and Dean Winchester, played by Jared Padalecki and Jensen Ackles. The Monkey personally prefers Padalecki to Ackles, but acknowledges that is a little like preferring the moon to the stars.

Jensen Ackles (left) & Jared Padalecki

Q: I have searched high and low and still haven't found the answer! What is the song playing in the background when Christian and Olli consummate their relationship on Verbotene Liebe? It is so beautiful and adds to the scene so well! -- Rachel, Los Angeles, CA

A: Of course the Monkey knows! The Monkey knows all (but isn’t, he hastens to add, a know-it-all!). If you’re referring to the song on the April 4^th episode, it’s “Breathe Me” by Sia.

Christian & Olli consummate their relationship

Q: Is David Cook, American Idol winner, gay? – Brian, Saskatoon, SK, Canada

A: David Cook is definitely not an out gay man, but gay rumors started when someone unearthed a page in an on-line journal of his where he writes about a “dreamy” boy. Alas, the entry was probably just a jokey riff in the voice of a teenage girl.

Might Cook be secretly gay? Well, he asked out former Idol star Kimberly Caldwell on live television. This moment of their date captured on videotape seems real enough, so unless Cook is as talented an actor as Idol finalist Jennifer Hudson, I’m going with not-gay.

David Cook

Next Page! Nuke! James Dean! Queer as Folk!