Best. Gay. Week. Ever. (July 24, 2009)

A TOTALLY SERIOUS, IN-DEPTH LOOK AT ABSOLUTELY ALL THE NEWS THIS WEEK
What exactly is Republican Senator Brownback afraid of? Did Karma bite Stephen Baldwin in the ass? Plus Giovanni's Room needs help, Drawn Together is returning and who has a problem with Legalize Gay? 

As if it wasn't bad enough Republican Senator Sam Brownback (KS) opposes gay marriage, he's now introduced a bill to the U.S. Congress banning the creation of human/animal hybrids. Said Brownback of the bill, "Creating human-animal hybrids, which permanently alter the genetic makeup of an organism, will challenge the very definition of what it means to be human and is a violation of human dignity and a grave injustice."

Hmm, this all seems a bit of an overreaction to something not exactly pressing. Methinks perhaps Brownback must have seen Old Spice's campaign featuring Scott Bailey as a centaur (and other creations) and felt certain ... stirrings. He is a Republican senator after all.

Personally, I oppose this because I'm hoping for a Matthew Mitcham merman hybrid.

It's not only bad form to revel in the misfortune of others, but it's also bad Karma. So I take no joy in reporting that actor Stephen Baldwin has filed for bankruptcy. The AP reports that Baldwin owes $1.2 million in mortgages, $1 million in taxes and $70,000 in credit card debt. Hmm, perhaps if Stephen had spent a bit more time focusing on what's going on in his personal life, rather than mine, he might not be in this mess. 

Speaking of Karma, here is a story about some morons who should be getting a swift Karmic kick in the derriere sometime soon. An American Apparel store near Washington, D.C. was vandalized due to a window display featuring t-shirts reading "Legalize Gay." Then another store actually in D.C. received a threatening phone call from a man who said he and his friends found the t-shirts offensive and would break the store's window if the shirts weren't removed. 

American Apparel says they won't be intimidated and will continue to speak out in favor of same-sex marriage.  Police said they are on the look-out for two men in their 20s. The first is wearing a "Legalize Stupid" t-shirt while his companion's shirt reads "I'm with Stupid. "

Philadelphia's Giovanni's Room, the oldest surviving gay bookstore in the country, is asking for your help. Ed Hermance, the store's owner, went public with news that one of the 36-year-old store's brick walls has to be completely replaced to the tune of $50,000. 

It's not exactly a secret that gay bookstores are on the financial ropes these days — New York's Oscar Wilde Bookshop closed in March — and GR is looking for volunteers to help organize readings and fundraisers to help pay for the wall. They're also asking the gay community to patronize the store instead of the evil corporate ones. 

After giving us way too many television series turned into movies — Get Smart, Bewitched, The Flintstones — Hollywood is finally getting one right. Comedy Central just announced that the animated comedy Drawn Together is coming to the big screen. And I can't wait.

This series, which ran for five seasons from 2004 to 2008, is not only one of the most foul, disgusting and flat-out hilarious animated series ever, but it also features out elf Xandir P/ Whifflebottom (voiced by Jack Plotnick) and the very heteroflexible Captain Hero.

Xandir: Oh, Captain Hero, why is Senator Brownback obsessed with us gays?
Captain Hero: I don't know, but we're hooking up later tonight, so I'll ask him.

No word yet on what horribly graphic sexual situations Xandir will find himself in, but no doubt Captain Hero will be part of the shenanigans. Look for the movie in 2010.

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