Best. Gay. Week. Ever. (May 30, 2008)

And while we might not be at a point where, as 20/20 correspondent John Quiñones hyperbolically claimed, one can “hardly turn on the TV anymore without seeing gay couples engaging in kissing,” we’re also certainly a long way from the time when a boy kissing a boy on a 2001 episode of Dawson’s Creek was considered groundbreaking and controversial.

All of these kisses received a fair amount of excited coverage here at AfterElton.com, home of the one and only NUKE countdown clock. While all this enthusiasm is understandable, I had to wonder Carrie Bradshaw-style, if in celebrating all this kissing, are we also selling ourselves short?

While it’s wonderful to see same-sex displays of affection becoming more common on television, I’m also disturbed by the continued disparity between how gay and straight relationships are handled. I was particularly dismayed by how the just-finished second seasons of two of my favorite shows, Brothers & Sisers and Torchwood, limited gay couples to kissing while straight couples surrounding them routinely engaged in hot-and-heavy bedroom pyrotechnics.

On Torchwood, we witnessed several bedroom scenes not only for Gwen (Eve Myles) and her new husband Rhys, but even the shy, pining Toshiko Sato (Naoko Mori). On the other hand, with Jack and Ianto (John Barrowman and Gareth David-Lloyd), we only heard cheeky references to various bedroom antics, while actual physical affection was limited to two (granted they were steamy) office-place kisses.

Gareth David-Lloyd (left) & John Barrowman

Similarly, on Brothers & Sisters, we were forced to observe Kitty and her husband (Calista Flockhart and Rob Lowe) in their varied efforts at procreating all over the house. Meanwhile, the entire relationship between Kevin and Scotty (Matthew Rhys and Luke Macfarlane) seemed limited to a restaurant kitchen and their sofa, with their bedroom door barely cracked open — even on their wedding night.

From left to right: Calista Flockhart, Matthew Rhys, Luke MacFarlane

But then I started rethinking this issue, and I decided that maybe for us as gay men, all those kisses on TV are more important than bedroom scenes. Homophobic loudmouths are only too happy to equate homosexuality solely and entirely with sex; this is the kind of ignorant thinking that argues that since gay men can’t control their libidos around each other, how can children, pets, and plant life ever be safe around them?

But kisses, while obviously often associated with sex, can also convey so much more; they can be expressions of intimacy, greeting, concern, caring, compassion, commitment, romance, and of course, love. These TV shows, in portraying same-sex kisses that convey all those meanings and more, inevitably open up the ways in which a mainstream viewing public view gay relationships and, by extension, gay men in general. And that’s a good thing.

Plus they’re awfully fun to watch. So I’m going to keep looking for and celebrating each and every gay kiss on network TV. And privately hoping that, from time to time, those kisses just might lead to something happening in the bedroom because the cock-eyed optimist in me believes the American public is ready to handle some gay pillow talk.

SUPER MARIO BODIES
I just dragged a friend to see the current revival of A Chorus Line on Broadway for his birthday. My excuse was that my friend had never seen it before, and I considered that grounds for immediate removal of his gay card and all the privileges it entitles. But just between you and me, I’ll share the real reason I was so keen on forking over 60 bucks a ticket to do this: I wanted to see Mario Lopez in the flesh. Yes, it’s true. I am just that shallow.

Mario Lopez in A Chorus Line