Welcome to the Jungle, Ladies!

The CW kicks off a new cycle of America's Next Top Model tonight starting at 8:00 with a special two hour premiere. I'll admit, ANTM is a bit of a guilty pleasure for me. I like to watch just to see Tyra Banks' fluctuating arm fat. (Girlfirend yo-yos on her weight quite a bit). A few other observations: 1. Twiggy's a bore -- nice enough-- but time to get someone else. Rula Lenska maybe? 2. Miss J -- who was great as a runway coach-- is completely nonsensical and annoying as a judge. Bring back Nole Marin (who always looked, to me, like a giant testicle with legs and Swifty Lazar glasses). At least he knew how to throw down with Janice Dickinson. 3. The show is getting meaner with each new cycle. (Or is that just me?) (Remember last season how they forced the girls to model nude on a rooftop in LA? It's one thing to require nude modeling on a closed studio set -- yet another to force teenage girls to shake their ta tas on a Hollywood hotel rooftop so tourists with zoom lenses can take photos of them. 4. CariDee (last cycle's winner) was right, Nigel Barker does have a stick up his butt. 5. They really need to have an ANTM: All Stars -- Bring back old favorites from previous seasons and let them have another go. I'd love to see Mercedes, Tiffany, Toccara, Shandy, Camille, Ann, Michelle, Lisa, Bree and Kim come back for an All Star cycle. Would that be cool or what?BTW, look for AfterElton's recap of each America's Next Top Model to start running this coming Friday.