Guillermo Serritiello's blog

While nothing can bring gay teen Lawrence “Larry” King back to life, his murder at the hands of a fellow junior high student brought to light the mostly ignored subject of the violent bullying often endured by kids who don’t fit in at school. Given that gender expression and sexual orientation were key elements that made Larry different from his peers, it makes perfect sense for The Advocate to address the story at length, which it does in its April 8 cover story by Neal Broverman, "Who’s to Blame?”

What at first seems like a broad rhetorical question on the cover unfortunately takes a literal turn as the writer searches high and low for scapegoats other than Larry's murderer, including the group home where Larry lived, LGBT advocates, “society,” and even Larry himself.

Casa Pacifica, the group home for abused, neglected, and emotionally troubled children where Larry lived, is blamed for somehow being a safe haven where he was “encouraged to dress as he pleased and live as the person he wanted to be.”

Broverman states that ”(i)t may be beyond the capacity of kids to reconcile a tolerant atmosphere like Casa Pacifica with the xenophobic, conformist nature of school.”

LGBT advocates, particularly the National Center for Lesbian Rights, are also blamed for their “Know Your Rights Guide” and “Queer and Trans Youth in California Foster Care Have Rights!” pamphlet, provided to all LGBT children at the Larry’s foster care facility. The author highlights many of these rights, like safe bathrooms and “the right for kids to wear clothes and hairstyles that fit their gender identity.”

These rights, and even “an illustration of a teenager in overalls and high heels” (pictured above) in one of the guides, are presented as dangerous freedoms taken “to heart in the last weeks of (Larry’s) life.”

Does anyone believe that an illustration and exposure to legal rights are responsible for Larry’s death?

February 2008 Out Magazine

2008’s first issue of Out magazine is hitting the stands with its Swimsuit Issue. February's centerpiece is a five page essay on Hot Nude Yoga (HNY), a New York City-based gay-centric practice. Out’s a gay magazine so nothing unusual there, right?

Well, Out chose a straight writer with no apparent yoga experience to be our eyes and ears regarding HNY to determine whether the company provided any “yogic benefit, or if it was just a place for dudes to hook up.” Were there no gay, capable freelance writers available to conduct this research? Or did the magazine have a different, more prurient angle in mind?

Aaron Star leading a HNY classBefore attending the class, our author (he’s straight he reminds us again in case we missed it) admits that he’s scared of being naked around gay men and cops to imagining gay guys in the class frolicking about and groping one another — and him.

Once the author goes to an actual class, the readers get page after page about his penis, more about his fear that a gay man would cop a feel, his not being able to focus due to his fears, and a confessional about his “spiteful” penis which he worries might betray him and get aroused. Hidden in the article are two quotes from Aaron Star, HNY’s founder, which are apparently used to comply with the author’s preconceived notion that gay nude yoga is a place to hook up with dudes.

He concludes that he’s not sure if what he did was yoga, but it was nude, kind of nice, and informs us that his penis remained “quiet and obediently limp.” All those pages, and not even a single quote from any of the gay men in the class? I hoped that at worst the writer would play the role of a young Jane Goodall, and the gays at HNY would be the chimpanzees. No such luck even on that level. I am gay, practice yoga, and have gone to nude yoga five times and can testify HNY deserved better than Out gave it.

At best the story is vanity piece peppered with snarky comments about gay butt hair and dangling testicles. The openly-gay founder and his followers come off looking lousy and even a little shady. When contacted for a quote regarding the essay, Mr. Star responded that “(f)or PR, the piece is great and the wise will seek the truth, and the unwise will continue in their way as they would if the article was an incredible piece of journalism.”

I subscribe to Out partly due to its status as the leading gay monthly and because it’s a colorful/feel-good read. If I wanted to know what obliquely homophobic straight men think of gays, I’d subscribe to Details.

Out and proud Andrew Christian builds an empire

Last time on The Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency ... More un-blurred gratuitous male nudity than the sum total of the show’s first two seasons, and a would-be cliffhanger involving Janice's new pet project, Dominique, who did not want to pose nude in front of the sweetest octogenarian art students this side of St. Olaf. The girl seems be a little slow on the uptake, as bad-boy model Brian Kehoe already told her that JDMA = nudity. Could it be any clearer?

As the first show of 2008 opens, we learn that Domie was allowed to keep her panties on and uses ridiculous props to cover herself. I could care less as it wasn’t like it was JP, CC or Dominic.  Once we’re done with Domi, we are taken back to the agency where Janice is having a casting meeting with Ashley Paige, a stylist turned mega-hip designer known for beyond expensive knit swimwear.

I carefully check all of Janice’s “clients” and follow up whether the show is being forthright about its claims and Janice is 100% correct here as this hippie-chick’s stuff is worn by every celebritard in Los Angeles, and her latest collection received a standing ovation during Mercedes Benz Fashion Week. A bunch of girl models are brought out and it’s clear that this woman knows what she’s looking for. She wants tomboys, freckles and skinny girls, and actually asks for "a stick" at one point. Is she looking for someone to wear a swimsuit or something for her dog to fetch?

Kehoe, Peyton, & Brian @ Go Softwear Photo Session

This week's The Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency outing offers something for everyone on your holiday shopping list, even if you have 12 unusually picky gay brothers. We’re talking 95% meat with only 5% filler.

The show gets the filler out of the way immediately in the first segment by addressing last week’s cliffhanger (not for me!). For those keeping score, Janice took off her size 4 skirt and dared a model who'd gained a lot of weight to try and fit into it. While Janice told her that she looked like something you’d eat between buns at Dodger Stadium, the model squeezes into it and wins; notwithstanding she gets put on “Fat Probation.” Like Joan Crawford in Mommie Dearest, Janice always wins. Then we have an odd scene showing Crystal, Janice’s most successful female model, meeting with Chris, an ex who is also a model at the agency. We learn that she spent the night in her car and apparently has no place to stay. He asks why, no clear answer is given, male model is really happy as he’s still crushing on this girl and that’s it. While this is the filler section, Janice will tell later tell us that Chris “shakes a big stick.” Thanks for sharing Janice. I hope that Crystal’s homelessness thread is not dropped like the scarred potential self-cutter from the premiere episode.

Next we are shown a bunch of models sitting around to show us that models are people too. The topic is masturbation. There is a great exchange between Brian Kehoe, an apparently straight male model, and Rodrigo De Carli, a very sexy new (and out) model who says he is from Brazil and has a boyfriend in Miami. He sounds quite Parisian to me, but then who can explain Madonna these days?

Kehoe: “Do you think J.P. is hot?” (I am thinking everyone should drink everytime J.P. is mentioned, shown, are alluded to in any capacity)

Rodrigo: “Ooze’s J.P.? “ (Sacrebleu! Say it isn’t so)

Kehoe: “He’s gay”

Rodrigo: “Ooooh so of courrrrrrsssse I mist know eem”

Kehoe: “You’ll cheat on your boyfriend with him.”

Rodrigo: “I don’t sheeet.”

Out Model Rodrigo di Carli

Rodrigo is pretty hilarious. It's good to have another out model who’s funny to boot, however, as was the case last time with Michael, a married father of three, Rodrigo is also described as "single" on the show’s website. It may not explain the accent, but if Rodrigo looks familiar you may be a fan of Chi Chi la Rue's work, as he was a Rascal Exclusive under the name “Claudio Martin.” All in the name of journalistic integrity, I had to do much research and I can confirm that besides being funny, he’s quite an impressive sight in both print and video.

La Rue tells GAYVN.com that that De Carli had a modeling career before entering porn. “We released him from his contract because he wanted to pursue his modeling career.” I don’t think that working for la Rue and Dickinson will be that different, as they have a lot in common and I am not just referring to their obvious support of the cosmetics industry. Keep spending girls as the Fed does not want to lower interest rates again! I am with la Rue in his assessment that if Dickinson is smart she’ll use any controversy for ratings. Janice is smart and probably hired cute Rodrigo in part because of the full spectrum of his work. As if Gabe and/or Duke would not have recognized him. I hope that Rodrigo fully owns his past.

The next segment is a Go Softwear casting, which has come to La Dickinson searching for a few good men for their new swimwear, underwear, and active wear line. We are shown a montage of 13 male models, including Dominic, who we know can’t accept any work as he’s signed an exclusive with 2(xist). Dominic, Dominic, Dominic! Stunning man. 

We also see out and proud couple Paul Anderson and Shawn McCarron, who are nowhere up to par with my favorites. They have provided a few show spoilers (which I would never reveal unless I warned you in advance) and have told the gay madia that they are not AT ALL fans of our J.P. and are also not too keen on Rodrigo. Can't the gays just get along? I am feeling protective of Rodrigo. 

*** WARNING: MANY SPOILERS ***

Unless there is some serious animosity among the final 4 competitors, the darkest of horses wins the final Individual Immunity Challenge, or there is a tie, Survivor finales tend to be among the most bloated and least exciting episodes of the season.

The standout for me is still without a doubt the very first edition, Survivor: Borneo, which ended with Richard Hatch, who many at the time called Reality TV’s first gay villain, taking the $1,000,000 prize. Not only was Hatch’s victory unexpected, but the finale pre-vote was dominated by the campy vitriol of a then 39-year old truck driver from Wisconsin named Susan Hawk. If you have not seen Susan’s downright Shakespearean closing (which was unscripted as she tossed what was given to her), just imagine Roseanne Barr channeling Helen Lawson from Valley of the Dolls talking about vultures, rats, snakes, and Mother Nature.

Tonight’s finale seemed very promising, with the possibility of cutie Todd Herzog, the 22–year openly gay Mormon, going all the way, thus becoming the first openly gay contestant to win since Hatch. Even if Todd did not make the final 3, there was potential for some serious fireworks at Tribal Council as some of the members of the Jury had already shown that they could be explosive, and Todd would not likely disappoint.

So how did Todd place? At this point all that I can tell you is that I have a horrible history of predicting winners, that there is no car challenge (for the first time in 14 seasons), and that this finale was probably even more bloated than any in recent history. It did include two elements that really stood out for me, the first being how many of the members of the jury were still very undecided about who to give their vote to at the end, and the other has to do with something that I would only be able to confirm by the end of the Reunion Show, which followed the 2-hour finale.

The Finale

After a surprisingly short summary of what happened from day 1 through the evening of day 36 (kudos to CBS), the show opens with Todd, Amanda, Denise, and Courtney returning from Tribal Council after having voted off Phei –Gee. Todd is very pumped as it looked like he could have been a goner yet again.

Day 37 begins with a really cool Reward Challenge that has the players building their own version of the Great Wall of China. They are playing for the most delicious looking pizza I’ve ever seen, beer, drinks, and even brownies. As is the case with last challenges, this one involved a combination of puzzles, balance, climbing, but for once no flags. Todd takes the early lead, but loses to Amanda yet again. At this point Todd still has not won a single Individual Reward Challenge or Individual Immunity, the latter of which is more problematic than the former.

Amanda has the choice of either stuffing her face alone or can share her reward with 1, 2, but not all 3 remaining players. Amanda is very nervous and puts her pageant experience to good use to try and figure out the best move for her as if she were in front of an audience. I would taken both Todd and Courtney, and certainly would have not eaten it alone, as that would have given the other 3 players too much time to be bitter and have an impact on the final vote as there was one remaining Immunity Challenge that was up for grabs. Amanda decides to only take Todd.

*** WARNING SPOILERS***

If you are a Todd Herzog fan, watching the last two episodes of Survivor: China has not been a particularly fun experience. Whether via outstanding editing and/or actual representation of the game, our gay powerhouse player has looked like he’s been in serious danger of being voted off.

Last week’s previews made it seem like Todd would finally be blindsided by Amanda, who, after masterminding James' unexpected offing, is starting to remind me of the title character in 1950’s Oscar-winning All About Eve. Will our beloved Todd’s torch be snuffed before its time just as Margo Channing’s was by the outwardly meek Eve? If Todd has not seen Bette Davis’ classic tale of deceptive ambition, I hope that he has enough Mean Girls wisdom to finish off what he started.

The show gets to business right away with a Reward Challenge that has the Final 5 using a replica of a 4th Century Chinese crossbow concoction to fire arrows at a target that has their names randomly written on it. To give it a wicked edge, the number of arrows that each player will fire will be based on how each player “secretly” distributes the 5 arrows that they are given. The winner will get to go on an overnight trip, via private jet, to the Great Wall of China.

Out of the total of 25 red roses (wrong show) arrows to be awarded, there are no surprises, as non-challenging Courtney receives a whopping 12 arrows. Outcast Peih-Gee receives only 1. Denise gets 2, Amanda 4, and our Todd 6. If the game were based on acumen, Todd would have won hands down as he was able to hit his own name with 5 out of the 6 arrows that he received. He would have been followed by Courtney and Denise who tied with only one hit each; however since the winner is based on how many times a player's name gets hit, urban hipster Courtney accidentally hits Denise’s name 5 times to give the Lunch Lady her second reward over Todd in as many weeks.  

Denise is allowed to invite two other players to join her in her reward excursion. She picks Courtney  and Todd, who always gets picked by the members of his alliance as they want to be on his good side. Amanda and a whiny Peih-Gee get sent back to camp with nothing. The winning threesome take off on the private jet, and we are entertained by our favorite flight attendant, who works it by welcoming all on board, announcing that they are on “Survivor Airlines Flight 15”, and making reference to how cool the passengers are. All in all, a cute sequence with Todd being the charming man-boy that he is.

The biggest delight of watching The Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency is that it is a non-filtered account of a whacked-out, acerbic, fearless, hilarious businesswoman trying to jumpstart yet another chapter in a career that should have been over decades ago. The gratuitous male nudity, one-liners, gay representation of many types, and plethora of opportunities to be fascinated and/or scared by all that is Janice simply seal the deal.

Like, the fictional Brian Kinney from Queer as Folk, who was collectively voted as the favorite TV gay character ever in our recent polarizing poll, Janice is unapologetic about her choices. She’s the first to admit to that, as a mother of two college-bound children, she’ll do whatever it takes to make a buck, which this week’s episode (Mo’ Money, Mo’ Problems) could not make any clearer. The show begins with Janice crashing VIP Latino’s tragic photo shoot only to find out that her girls will no longer share the cover with the great Carlos Mencía (who?), but will instead appear in some third-rate editorial showcasing clothing sold at Mervyn’s due to a scheduling conflict with Señor Mencía.

Janice will have none of that and reminds the annoying co-founder that she is a star and they can put her and her girls on the cover. While I love my Janice, I am too much of a skeptic to believe that the opening of her Latino division will make the cover as strongly suggested the by narrative. I give you the cover of the first issue of VIP Latino. Yes, it´s Eva Longoria.

Next we see another of the agency’s top money earners telling Janice that she has moved on to a bigger agency. Janice gives the model a well-rehearsed guilt trip about having turned her from a little nobody into a real model, only to be left high and dry.

I don’t know if it was that I was watching the show on a 46 inch HDTV versus my usual 32 incher, but as she spoke, Janice’s eyelashes looked like horror movie spiders caught in an oil spill. The “lashes” kept moving in all sorts of gravity-defying ways as she spoke. I smell another open call and more drama with Janice’s business partner, the absolutely underwhelming Peter Hamm.

***WARNING: SPOILERS***

Survivor is certainly not the water-cooler show that it was when a naked love-to-hate Richard Hatch schemed and plotted to became the show’s inaugural winner during the summer of 2000. If you are not watching this 15^th edition, Survivor: China, you have not only been missing out on its most engaging and competitive outings in years, but also on the strategic play of a 22 year-old gay Mormon flight attendant named Todd Herzog.

Todd has been a force to be reckoned with since he stepped foot in China, and for my money is the most charming, clever, and confident player to ever represent us on this show and has proven that he is much more than the obligatory gay cog in the cast of usual reality TV suspects. He also happens to grace the 2007 year-ending issue of Instinct.

This episode opens immediately after a brutal Tribal Council which resulted in a total blindside offing of James, this edition’s strongest, buffest, and seemingly set in stone player to reach the finals. Every gay man must have needed a little something to take the edge off after watching last week’s episode as Todd’s head was on the line and could have easily been the one sent home.

After some scary night vision footage of the last remaining six players celebrating the end-result of a strategic move that could have backfired in a huge way, the increasingly competitive mullet-sporting “Lunch Lady” states, quite convincingly, that if their move had not succeeded, they “would all be dead'' (and I don’t think that she was even taking into account that James owns a burial service and is a gravedigger).

It was a smart move to get rid of James, but we lost a stunning example of the male form. Here’s a hard-to-find James souvenir image to last you until the next edition of the show, which (***possible gossip-based spoiler***) he is rumored to be a part of. I am a facts man, so the alleged 2^nd All-Star Edition Internet noise is just that until I receive verifiable confirmation.

Yes, it’s that time of the year again. Better than Thanksgiving/Halloween/Christmas combined. I am of course referring to the Season 3 premiere of The Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency.

I had to dust off my channel guide to see where in heavens Oxygen TV is on the cablescape. I’ve been known to provide a mean blow by blow account of this show as I can find the nuance/joy/cattiness/love in every eye movement that Janice makes (when she can move either of them). But this will be a mini-recap, as I know that all you care about is how she looks, how many male models were shown naked, and whether any of them are gay.

• Janice: Looks almost unrecognizable/terrible/awesome/scary. Show opens with a maxi-footage photo session with Janice in different “looks” and one of "looks" resembled Janice so she's in there somewhere. She stops to remind the audience that she’s not only the world’s first supermodel, but the longest working supermodel to boot. Take that, Twiggy!

• Full uncensored male butt shots: A generous 4 or 5 exceptionally round ones, depending on whether you count the upteenth showing of the Romanian hunk from last season who just did not have what it takes as a model, as "new" or not. He is now Janice’s bodyguard. I think that it is he who would need a body guard to protect himself from Janice, as she looks like she could eat anyone alive and not leave a single bone.

• Gay models: No new confirmations, although we know from the show's PR folks that newcomers Shaun and Paul are both gay, and also a couple. We of course also get to catch up with our good bud J.P. Calderon and the apparently straight Dominic Figlio. Both Calderon and Figlio have become the faces/bodies of 2(x)ist since we last saw them, as chosen by 2(x)ist creative director Jason Scarlatti during the sophomore season of the show. Before the hour is over one of these studs will be forced to shave his sexy arms and knuckles (thus betraying his Italian heritage) for his photoshoot as the ONLY face for 2(x)ist for this year. (Hint: It's Not J.P.) Check out this pic of our Janice, who was apparently stuck to Mr. Scarlatti, as her lips may be having "issues." I know it's wrong, but I love Janice more than really nice people.

Here's what went down this episode ...