New York Times Magazine on Young Gay Men and Marriage

The latest New York Times Magazine has a great cover story on how young gay guys view marriage — basically, how gay folks under 30 are different from their older counterparts when it comes to tying the knot. The author profiles a number of younger gay couples in Massachusetts, where same-sex marriage is now legal. (Interestingly, the couples are all white, something the author acknowledges, but doesn't explore.)

What's it all about in a nutshell? Basically, a lot of young gay men no longer see themselves as all that different from their straight counterparts, so of course they want to get married (and most who get married want to have kids, too). But at the same time, having been excluded from full participation in society for so long (and being, well, gay), some of these folks feel they can "pick and choose" the aspects of heterosexual marriage they like while ignoring those they don't (and others were pretty traditional).

In other words, it will pretty much drive Bill Bennett, Maggie Gallagher, and every other outspoken critic of same-sex marriage berserk. How dare gay people sully the noble institution of marriage with their egalitarian, sometimes non-traditional ways!

From left to right: Maggie Gallagher, Andrew Sullivan, Bill Bennett

But there's more to it than that. It seems to me the article pretty much proves exactly what Andrew Sullivan has been arguing for over fifteen years now: that same-sex marriage is a normalizing force on the gay community, and, perhaps, a positive, liberalizing force on the straight community, too. (Sullivan is a disingenuous lunatic with a disastrous record as a pundit during the Clinton and Bush years, but he was right about same-sex marriage looooong before anyone else was even talking about it, so credit must go where credit is due.)

In other words, the article will probably drive the gay radicals even crazier than it does Bill and Maggie. Sell outs! Assimilationists!

Hmmm, something to piss off the irrational fringe on both the right-wing and the gay left? Now that's a good article!

Oh, the article has pretty great graphics, too! Kudos to the New York Times for giving the issue such a thoughtful (and prominent) look.

Vassili and Marc

Erwin Olaf for The New York Times

What are your thoughts on the topic? Would you marry your partner if it were legal where you live? Do you think there is a significant difference in how older gay men and younger gay men view relationships in the way the article suggests?