Video: Gay Michael decides to leave "Bromance" to the bros

I can't believe that we've been publishing for a full six hours already and haven't yet mentioned the real gift from heaven that arrived in our collective manger this holiday season: MTV's new reality show Bromance.

I still don't know what the hell the point of the show is, why it's on the air or how they convinced Brody Jenner to embed himself in a cell of his own stalkers like this, but it's absolutely AMAZING. More homoerotic than a clothing-optional screening of Querelle for the Australian rugby team at Kristin Bjorn's beach house, the show is must-watch trainwreck television that is all the more fascinating for the fact that it somehow sidesteps being homophobic in its quest to pair up a straight young guy with the man of his dreams.

Brody Jenner

Case in point: The voluntary exit of Michael, the lone gay contestant. Even though gay Mike does well in the first challenge (and cleverly argues in his toast that his being gay will actually get Brody more action), he quickly tires of the skirt-chase talk and "flea market gone retarded" surroundings (his words, not mine) and decides to leave the show. Jenner is gracious about his exit, and a few of the other guys have nice words to say about him as well. But best of all, his sexuality is never made an issue by anyone.

Check out the clip of Mike's exit, after the break (note: you'll have to jump through 5 clips to get to it, unfortunately!). And Mike, thanks for classing up the joint (sort of) and then getting the hell outta dodge! Now ... um ... can we talk about the eyebrows? What, too soon? K, my bad.