Gay TV Greecap: Greek's season finale

Last night, hot on the heels of some eerily similar gay teen fauxmance drama on As the World Turns, Greek pulled out all the stops in its season finale in terms of the storyline for Calvin (played by actor Paul James), the show's main gay character. Actually, it kind of pulled out the stops for everyone ... but with Calvin more than anyone, we're left seriously hanging until the runaway hit returns in 2008.

Longest. Fall. Break. Ever.

*-*-SEASON FINALE SPOILERS FOLLOW-*-*

So last night things came to a head (an appropriately Oxy-set reference, no?) in terms of Calvin's relationship with Ashleigh, the well-meaning but sorta ditzy sorority girl with whom Calvin has spent much of his time since his BFF Rusty ran off with Lonelygirl15 and Heath broke up with him. (Or did he break up with Heath? With all that passive-aggression it turned into a "Who's on First" routine by the end there.)

Ashleigh calls Calvin to a seedy hotel room that looks like where they filmed most of that movie Bug with Ashley Judd. (Or Vacancy, the one where Kate Beckinsale and Luke Wilson get attacked from the guy from Career Opportunities. Or Identity, the one where Jake Busey gets a bat stuffed down his throat. Anyway, it's not exactly a Radisson, let's put it that way.) She says she's going to seduce Travis, her jerk of a long-distance boyfriend, and she needs Calvin to lend his expertise in zhuzhing the place up a bit. Calvin is happy to help.

After lots of drama about a newspaper article that reveals all the scandals of the season to the entire school and OMGISOCAN'TBELIEVELONELYGIRL15DIDTHATOMGOMGOMGOMG, we return to the room, which looks pretty much the same except for the pyre of scented candles on the table and a scarf thrown over the light fixture. Great, so now it's a dive and a firetrap that smells like a Crabtree & Evelyn. Big improvement. Calvin compliments Ashleigh (through the bathroom door) on her work and she emerges in what might be a negligee but honestly just looks like a prom dress to me.

Regardless, he's impressed and tells her she looks hot. She of course responds by trying to make out with him, and to his credit, he instantly pulls back and says, "Oh, I'm gay!" This leads to what might be my favorite bit of gay-related dialogue this entire year:

Calvin: I'm gay.
Ash: Uh, what do you ... what do you mean, "gay"?
Calvin: I've been meaning to tell you for weeks --
Ash: Wait a second, you've know for weeks?!

Yes, Ash. Weeks.

Later, when Casey notices that Ash is behaving strangely back at the wasps' nest ("You're hugging your pillow and you're not wearing earrings..."), Ash tells her that Calvin is gay and Casey says that he was probably afraid of how people would treat him if they knew, noting that the Greek system isn't known for being overly tolerant. See? Who says sorority girls are clueless?

Well, sometimes they are, as is made clear when Ashleigh goes to make up with Calvin at his frat house. He's not home, so she instead inadvertently outs him to his entire frat. Oops. It's not malicious, as I was afraid it might be, just a very very dumb mistake that the infinitely more balanced sister-of-a-serial-killer Maddie would NEVER make.

One of the frat guys keeps calling her "Calvin's girlfriend" and she keeps telling him that they're "just friends", leading him to joke, "right, because Calvin's gay." Ashleigh says, "Oh, so you guys know too!". Silence. (Someone hands Ashleigh the Aardvark-to-Benchwarmer volume of the encyclopedia and asks her to look up "gullible".) Realizing that she's screwed everything up royally, Ash makes a quick exit.

Meanwhile, Calvin confides in Rusty for the first time in 2 months (now that Lonelygirl15 has been given the Rita Skeeter evil journalist beatdown, they're allowed to talk again, I guess) and he admits that he just should have been honest. Tough lesson, and one worth learning.

Later, Calvin runs into Ashleigh at the bar and they're all "I'm-so-sorry-no-I'M-so-sorry-no-you're-cuter-no-YOU'RE-cuter" ... and then Ash drops the house on his sister. Calvin gets suitably heated and leaves. He goes home to his frat house and is less-than-surprised to find that the temperature inside has plummeted since Ash outed him. It's downright frosty, which makes it all the funnier when a guy in a towel inexplicably walks through the living room, likely trying to find craft services. Seriously, what's a guy in a towel doing in the foyer? Did he have to check on his carrot cake in the middle of a shower? Whatever the cause, it's totally unnecessary and therefore hilarious.

What follows isn't, though. Calvin, instantly recognizing (deciding?) that the frat isn't accepting him for who he really is, takes off his pledge pin (or his Blue Diamond Almonds keepsake pin, can't tell which) and leaves the house.

So that's that: Calvin has left the building, and no word on whether he'll return. To be fair, all the characters had their lives turned upside down this episode, and all are left in the doldrums. The most interesting thing to me about Calvin's story in particular is that yet again, he's made up other people's minds for them before they've really had a chance to. He thinks he's being confident, but he's really avoiding rejection by rejecting himself first, which likely hurts a bit less. Probably what happened with Heath, and what complicated things with Ashleigh as well. There's no telling that the frat boys wouldn't have come around to Calvin if he gave them a chance, but he made a very hasty exit. (Not that he should have to suffer so that others can learn tolerance, of course, but we all know sometimes there's a little work involved.)

So what'd you guys think? Will you be back next semester?