After yesterday's bed-hopping, tummy-bumping shenanigans, Luke and Noah are back to being utterly serious about the whole "sham wedding to throw off immigration and drive Casey to climb a bell tower with a high-powered rifle" thing. So the boys decide to do what any enterprising gay boys would do in this situation: put on a show!

Yes, Nuke decide that the answer to their problems is to make a movie about their situation ... and to help them out, I've taken the time to throw together a poster that they're more than welcome to use.

Will Ameera be game for this project? Will Casey be camera-shy? Will Andie MacDowell ever forgive me for replacing her head with Sharkie?

Click through the jump and refresh to find out as it happens! 

Lights ... camera ... inaction!

2:55PM EDT: Austin From Days just said "Deal ... or no deal?" Is that on this network?

Preview time! Uh-oh - Ameera kisses Noah. Sheesh. Casey tells Luke that Ameera isn't interested in him because she's scrambling Noah's eggs. Or wait ... I think I messed that up ... Anyway, nice to see the gay boys can kiss as long as they don't kiss each other. See you next week...

2:53PM EDT: Holden comes home and finds that Lily has wandered away from her box for a minute, and pounced on it like a raptor stealing an egg from a stegosaurus nest. Lily catches him in the act. He tells her that he thinks they should put the box "in the attic ... with the 14 other children we keep up there."

Noah tries to talk Ameera into coming out of the bedroom but she won't budge, and the boys realize that something terrible must have happened to her after her mother died. Um ... yathink? 

Luke gets huffy and leaves. Noah goes into the bedroom and tells Ameera that if she doesn't want to do the film anymore that's fine. She says it's just difficult remembering but if it will help convince the ICE that their marriage is real, she'll do it. He puts his arm around her, and of course Luke sees them through the window.

Hey wait, I have it figured out: LUKE is an ICE agent!!!!

Nah, that's way too interesting. Hey, can anyone explain to me how sitting in the living room with a camera is going to convince ICE that Nameera are a real married couple? Or are the kids planning on getting their movie into Sundance and flying the agents out to Park City to see it?

2:43PM EDT: Wait, what's COPD? I have no idea, but this lady and the fibromyalga woman should totally go out and get drunk together.

Luke's getting really into this whole project. He says he wants to interview Ameera about her life in Iraq and Noah gets all excited about it being like a reality show. Ameera suggests Luke just make something up instead and holds a card with "I AM NERVOUS ABOUT TALKING ABOUT MY BACKGROUND BECAUSE I AM HIDING SOMETHING" written in Sharpie above her head. Noah goes to get the camera. 

With Ameera on camera, Luke asks her what life was like in St. Olaf. She falters but then starts telling about how there's no running water and little food where she is from. She again tells Noah that she had a better life than many because of Perv's cash donations. She gets teary-eyed when she talke about what happened after her mother died, and she eventually runs off into the bedroom.  

2:35PM EDT: Noah apologizes to Luke for freaking out and says he's just jumpy. Ameera brings them coffee but Noah declines. Okay, there's definitely something wrong with him. Luke tells Noah about his plans for making a movie. Noah's all, "About what?" and Luke's all, "Us!"

Meanwhile, Lily and Quaker Oats Lady have an OMGOMGOMG Gilmore Girls moment at the farm, and Holden and MP2.0 share the flipside over at Maddie Alley. 

Back to Noah: "Are you out of your mind?" Luke says that they can make a bicultural love story about the story that they're trying to project, not their real situation, in order to throw off ICE. Noah's all, "who'd want to see a movie like that" and Ameera's all "ME ME MEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEEEEEEEEE!" 

2:25PM EDT: Lily suggests to Luke that he come up with a school project to make an excuse to spend time with Noah. 

Back at the Love Shack, Noah is still playing Educating Rita with Ameera. Back in Saint Olaf, men don't do dishes, apparently. Um ... ditto for my apartment. Luke comes in with his good news but Noah instantly snaps, "What are you doing here?!" 

Henry is trying to convince Austin From Days to get worked up in a lather about the meeting of the Obstacles, but he's keeping a level head. Oh, he just snapped.

Love Shack: Noah goes out onto the porch to see if ICE is hiding in the birdbath. He tells Luke that he can't just barge in and Luke says he most certainly can. He asks if Noah is going to listen to his idea or not.

Quaker Oats Lady has a pretty hot freak-out on MP2.0. Hell hath no fury like a woman recently drowned in oatmeal, nearly killed by a puppet, and brushed off by the ex-husband she got drunk and slept with.

The Obstacle's Obstacle is pretty dreamy, no? 

2:15PM EDT: Austin's still shirtless, and Henry comes in to tattle on the Two Obstacles, and screams at Austin to put a shirt on. Shut up, Pepperkakor! 

2:13PM EDT: QAL thinks that playing a little "hide the Chandler" with MP2.0 will make everything better, but he's not having it. TAKE NOTE, AMEERA!

Meanwhile, The Blonde Obstacle and the Blonde Obstacle Obstacle meet for coffee while Austin From Days lounges shirtless in bed, which is fine with me. 

Hey, it's Henry! He's still alive?  

Lily and Holden are talking about how things suck for Luke when he's finally found someone he loves, and Luke comes in. Kind of cute that they're so concerned. Luke explains everything to them and Lily tells him that they just have to find an excuse to be together. Atta girl!

Ameera (with her head-wrap back in place) is waiting on Noah hand and foot and he explains that that's not how things work in our country. Then he burns his bra. 

2:05PM EDT: Back at Pity Me Ranch the next morning, Lily is still looking at the box of things that Dusty sent her. Somebody get this girl some Lunesta! Luke comes downstairs and Lily asks if she can make him some breakfast. He huffily says he's not hungry. Quick Lily, toss him a Toaster Strudel!

Over at the Love Shack, Noah wakes up (shirtless) to find Ameera gone. He goes into the kitchen to find her there - scarfless! - with a homemade breakfast for him. Mmmm ... do I smell boiled bunny? My favorite!

Eeeeew, slow-mo sex scene between Quaker Oats Lady and Matthew Perry 2.0. Seriously, why should I have to suffer through this if the Old Lady from Dubuque is being spared Luke and Noah kissing? Yech. Oh - shirtless and tousled Austin From Days. Okay, all better.