Yes, you heard it right: Yours truly will be here live and in person to share the magic that is the Project Runway Season 4 finale tonight at 10:00PM Eastern Standard Time. Whether you're trapped in a relationship with someone who doesn't appreciate the gonzo genius of the Designsketeers™ and you need someone with whom to clasp hands (electronically, of course) during the final moments or you just want to play drinking games alone in your dark apartment with faceless strangers (I say shots for every "fierce" and "hot tranny mess"), we're here for you.

So put on your best sweatpants and join me here to marvel at the impossible perfection of Posh Spice's cheekbones, mourn the loss of the best Pooh bear this show has ever seen, and try to pick out my own shiny head in the audience at the final runway show.

Any predictions? And can you guess whose dresses are in the pic below? (Hint: we won't be seeing two of them tonite...)

Click on through the jump and refresh for breaking updates!

And away we go, folks! Have your TimGunnTinis and Heidi Highballs at the ready, and let's judge!

10:59PM EST: They cry and hug and Rami makes his exit. If I didn't know that she was an alien, I would even think that Victoria Beckham is crying. Heidi gives him a huge hug and tells him he's fierce (um, if you're really playing the drinking game, you're legally dead by now, btw). And his family comes out (hey, we never met them, did we?!) and Tim comes out and hugs him and says, "Do you believe it?" and Christian's all, "yeah".

Christian is the youngest winner in the history of Project Runway, at 21 years old. On his way out he tells Victoria Beckham that he'll "be in touch". Classy and sassy, right to the end.

As Christian is given the keys to his Saturn, he gets behind the car, deadpans "Fierce" and drives off into the sunset.

And that's it, folks! 

10:57PM EST: Jillian is legitimately surprised. But she'll be okay.

Christian is going to cry.

AND CHRISTIAN WINS. 

And he does cry! 

10:56PM EST: Jillian ... is out.  

10:55PM EST: Christian wins the call-in fan vote, with 43%. 

10:53PM EST: So we're almost there! Any last-minute predictions? Oh! Look who got all dressed up for the big moment!!

10:50PM EST: Jillian's on the block. They liked her stuff because she took a chance and her stuff was feminine yet modern and impeccably crafted. But ultimately they think she lost focus and had too many different looks.

Christian is up. He's really really nervous, which is crazy. Victoria calls him "mayjah" and he looks like he's going to die.

Michael loved his final two-tone dress but complains about the monotony of the black and some of the heavy-handedness of the statement.

He made Victoria smile, and it's hard to make her smile. Hot!

Heidi loved Rami's collection. Michael also liked his woven pieces but he didn't like some of the colors. HA! Atta girl. He calls them "Brady Bunch colors". Victoria compliments the time that went into some of the dresses, which sounds to me like she can't think of anything nice to say. 

The designers go to drink vodka out of plastic cups on Jennifer Convertible sofas (seriously, where do they send these poor people?!) and the judges deliberate. Posh is gung-ho for Christian. Nina's buying it too. Heidi and Michael are a little more concerned about it being overdesigned. Jillian's collection seems too all over the place for them. They think Rami is cerebral and technically proficient but they have issues with his color selection. Thank GOD.

10:43PM EST: Okay, there was just the boy-boy version of that Levi's ad, followed by an ad for Xanadu on Broadway with humptastic Cheyenne Jackson in short-shorts so tight you can see his religion. This must be like the Superbowl Halftime of gay ad buys.

And we're back! 

The judges were really, really impressed. I should hope so!

I love that they still tell the contestants that the winner will get a Saturn whatever. From what I can tell, the caterers on this show get their own Saturn AND their own commercial where they talk about where they like to go get their nails done. 

10:38PM EST: Alright, are we ready for some hot S&M foxhunt wear?

'Cause Christian's up. He tells the audience that they look fierce and he looks like he means it. He's totally gaga over Victoria Beckham being there.

Yes! The Santa Beard outfit! Heidi looks like it has fried her circuits - she has no response.

Out come the Bitches of Sherwood Forest. And then come the hot cream numbers - tons of frills and lace and hoopdee and everyone goes hogwild. 

Christian walks out his ladies and does a little pivot at the end of the runway. They interview a bunch of other designers and everyone has different favorites, of course. Rami gets a big hug from his "best friend". 

How beautiful is this world when Elizabeth Berkeley has her own show? Praise he gay gods of reality television. 

10:35PM EST: Rami's up. They kindly cut the part in his intro speech where he hawked up a loogie at the end. His line really doesn't do it for me ... i don't like the colors and it all feels kind of musty and matronly. Ugh, here comes the Greek statuary.  

Alright, that lace dress is gorgeous, but it looks stiff. I don't like his black Reese's Peanut Butter Cup wrapper number because of the Princess Leia buns on the hips. 

10:29PM EST: Okay, there was just an ad for a Disney Princess Talking Doll that says "when you brush my hair, my jewels twinkle!" That used to happen to me, but it cleared up.

10:26PM EST: The three enter the empty tent at Bryant Park and they are visibly stunned at the size. They group hug and Jillian tells the others that she loves them. Christian remarks that the show is going to be 45 minutes long with a runway of that length.

They're off and running!

Christian's girls aren't there. Uh-oh.

The guests swarm in and I'm of course looking for myself. As though they'd waste screen time on me. Jack! Dale! Kevin! Jay! Tyson! Kayne! Andre!

Holy eff, one of Christian's models totally didn't show. And then she did at the very last minute. Wow, that would suck! But even with the crunch, he's still got time to do his hair. Sweet.

Jillian is oddly calm. Did someone slip her a Xanax or twelve?

Heidi walks out in her white hot hot rocker pants and glittery shirt and bangs to next Tuesday. Michael Kors, Neeeehnagarcia, and Special Judge Victoria Beckham are there in the front. God that Posh can dress for an event -- you could see her orange dress from Washington Heights.

Jillian's up first. I love it - the little flared skirts, the fit, the metallics, everything. Actually, one of the jackets has like bat-wings or something. Those can go. Her jackets are of course ferosh and I love the crested hats. She really took that final challenge from the Metropolitan Museum and ran with it. 

10:17PM EST: Jillian gets the word from the casting guy that it'll be too difficult to pull together more models by tomorrow. Um, this is NEW YORK EFFING CITY. Throw a shoe out the window and you'll hit a model, for Christ's sake.

Jillian's all "waaah waah waah" over the models, and even though Rami kindly tries to talk her down, she ain't havin' it. He should call her a waahmbulance. 

They have hair and makeup consultations and then do their final fittings. Christian is ready to go. Rami has his shoes arranged in this insanely type-A semicircle that makes him look like he's going to sacrifice someone in the middle of it.

Christian calls Rami "Ramina" and then calls him a trannie. Atta girl. 

Tim comes in to tell them the order that they'll show in and then almost breaks down in telling them that they are bar none the finest group he's had on the show. Again, someone please get me one of him to keep in my kitchen. 

10:12PM EST: Jillian being Jillian, she suddenly decides that she doesn't like her models waaaay too late. She gets on her Sidekick ("stripper's phone of choice", as I've been told) and tries to re-cast in the middle of the night. Oh, that's not gonna be a problem or anything ...

Rami and Christian look on and they get that look on their faces that the castaways get in the cartoons when they're really hungry and their friend looks like a hotdog or a chicken leg or something. 

Alright, commercial break. My completely untrained eye liked Christian's gonzo but unforgettable line the most, then Jillian's, then Rami's. Actually, I liked Chris's even more than Rami's (check out those dresses above!) but I think he picked the wrong three looks to use for his final elimination. 

10:07PM EST: Jillian wonders if they're going to fight at the model casting. Christian does his runway walk wearing one of Jillian's weirdo Spartan cockscomb hat thingies.

Model selection: All three designers pretty much want the same models.

The three go to bed, and Jillian says "Goodnight, Ramina". It's like a gay Waltons!  

The next morning, Rami says, "let's go, bitches!" and they're out. Okay, who wants to do a shot whenever anyone says "bitch"?

Christian straps his models into their Bitches of Sherwood Forest getups and they all look rather uncomfortable ... but FIERCE. He basically says he doesn't care if they snap in two the second they step off the runway, and points out that he wore the same shoes around his apartment.

10:05PM EST: Christian, Rami, and Jillian get ready in their suite. They all want to win. Nooooo... really?

Rami thinks that Christian is intimidated by his final line. Christian wants Rami and Jillian to be impressed by his final line. Jillian apparently couldn't care less, as we don't hear from her.

Tim is concerned that Jillian's "exploding whipped cream mime" sweater is "unresolved". He's a poet.

Rami decided to tone down certain pieces, as per Tim's guidance. Tim is really impressed.

Tim wonders if Christian's is "overdesigned". Which is Timspeak for "batsh*t craaaazy".

10:00PM EST: Alright, folks, let's put it on the table. Who do you think is gonna take this turkey?