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News, Reviews & Commentary on Gay and Bisexual Men in Entertainment and the Media

Mores for Gays video blog (Ep. 11): Urinal etiquette

Gay men and straight men alike can have public restroom anxiety. Where do you stand? Where do you look? In this episode, Daniel discusses the common faux pas of urinal behavior. Hopefully it will bring some relief!

Watch it after the break!

Brent Hartinger's picture

Hilarious

Daniel, your vlogs keep getting better and better!

 

 

 

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friday13fan's picture

My only tip would be to

My only tip would be to maybe blink occasionally! Still, it was enjoyable, and you are no trouble to look at or listen to regardless of your eyelid activity.
Brent Hartinger's picture

Okay....

THAT'S the world's weirdest criticism. You're worried about Daniel's eye-moisture level?

 

 

 

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friday13fan's picture

I'm not worried about it,

I'm not worried about it, but it's like it makes it where I can't break eye contact, and I feel like I can't blink myself! I hope it didn't come across as too critical; it was really just an observation.
Distingué Traces's picture

Telling a guy you can't stop staring into his eyes

...doesn't sound like very harsh criticism to me.

But isn't this something they teach you in TV college? I've heard that if you blink a normal amount while on camera then you come across as squinty and dithery, so the pros know to hold it until the camera cuts away, or at least until the end of a paragraph.

No, not "distant gay traces" -- it's distingué traces!

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David E is a Fraud!'s picture

Daniel's eyes are...

just flat-out dreamy. 

Steve Forbes inability to blink used to creep me out though... <shudder>

-Sibelius

"It's curtains for you, Dr. Horrible. Lacy, wafting curtains..."

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purple_squirrel's picture

omg now you have mentioned

omg now you have mentioned it i feel like I can't blink either until he does. its really odd! kinda tense, like when you can't breathe. and he really doesn't blink much at all! 

________________________________

"there's always time for a burrow..."
"We're getting fired, fired, fired, firedddd"

*** meep meep! ***

Darrien's picture

Etiquette

The fact that someone has given so much concentrated thought to a topic otherwise ignored by experts on etiquette impresses me more than I can say. Bizarre, but completely fascinating. Well done.
Jaymz Luke Alyn's picture

THANK YOU!

thank you SO much for this...it cleared something up for me. i've been told that you're not supposed to look down, and i was a little confused because in my head i'm thinking...why not? it's my penis? it's not like i'm seeking arousal from looking down, it's just, i have peripheral vision, as do many others i hear, and it makes me EXTREMELY uncomfortable if i can tell someone is watching me. i'd rather be completely oblivious to the apparent peep show that i'm giving the gentleman next to me than to be aware and feel awkward. all in all, i feel like this should be published somewhere, or made into a public service announcement because people need to know. who cares about the youth and drugs, let's focus on what's important!

Jaymz Luke Alyn

Michael 's picture

the only problem I have is

the only problem I have is trouble trying to pee when some els is standing RIGHT THERE, so I have to wait till they leave other wise that pee aint comin out! Im also worried that whoever Im standing by in the urinal is looking over and it just bugs the hell outta me, why dont they just build the walls up to the head? anyway, the guy doing the vlog is hot.

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Cirpricio's picture

The same happens to me!!

I have to concentrate really hard to pee if someone is near me (and even with concentration some times I just can’t do it).

There’s a mall near my home where they put advertisements just in front of the urinals so you can read them while you pee (that’s pretty smart considering that most males stare at the wall at that moment) and some are very funny too (there’s one of an optometrist that say  “It Doesn’t look big enough?, maybe you just need some glasses” or something like that)

David E is a Fraud!'s picture

"the guy doing the vlog is hot"

I scored your comment 5 points in agreement ;^ )

-Sibelius

"It's curtains for you, Dr. Horrible. Lacy, wafting curtains..."

Anonymous's picture

No longer pee shy

Thanks to good therapy and Prozac I am no longer pee shy, and I am happy to say I can even have a conversation next to a co-worker at an adjacent urinal while peeing. One thing I did want to include in this conversation is my personal technique for the turn away, which isn't a turn away but a backing out. I take a three steps back which gives the view of the other person's back before turning away. And while backing out I'm also tucking my shirt in my pants and zipping up, which makes the backing out seem very natural. And it also gives me the appearance of a well-organized and stable person.
Andros's picture

Damn! I though I would get

Damn! I though I would get good tips about how to look at an other man junk in the urinal. *roll eyes*

 

lol Just kidding. :)

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David E is a Fraud!'s picture

Heyyyyy....!

Why does Brian's byline appear on Daniel's vlog? 

-Sibelius

"It's curtains for you, Dr. Horrible. Lacy, wafting curtains..."

Brian Juergens's picture

Heyyyyyy

Don't mind me, I'm just the editor! We need to keep Daniel's adorable mug in front of the camera, so I take care of posting his wonderful vlogs. Dennis and I post all the vlogs, so our names are on the posts - just a technical thing.
JC's picture

More important than you might imagine

There is an excellent video on YouTube that features Sims demonstrating male bathroom etiquette and the devestation that may occur if rules are broken.  Daniel summed it all up perfectly and I advise everyone to view the video as well so that you will understand the importance of compliance this these mores.  That's right, NOT amores folks.
HapNStance's picture

I wish I could remember the exact quote...

But some piece by a mainstream author I once read declared "urinals, due to the number of men who are performance shy, are like the flies in men's briefs, used so infrequently as to make them of questionable practicality." Although, I'm sure, much more clevely than I am able to summon up in hazy memory.

Nous Sommes Tous Sauvages.

Ron's picture

Quite amusing!

Quite amusing!
Tony's picture

The ultimate test

To those guys who are pee shy consider this. When I was in the South African army many moons ago they had an ablutions tent set up when we were out in the bush. Therein were these upside down plastic cones planted in mother Earth a few feet apart. These were not for peeing, my friends - that you just did against the nearest tree. They were for.....Number Two.

Believe me when you are sitting having a shit next to another guy with your knees almost touching you pretty much HAD to have a conversation just to distract yourselves from what you were doing.

Mike's picture

Good Points

Hello Brian,

I love your points there right on the money man. Love your blogs you have a great long weekend,

 

Mike

David E is a Fraud!'s picture

Sending Out 'Bat Signal' for Brian...

Heyyyyyy, Brian!

See, now that's the kind of thing that troubles me...

Mike thinks that Daniel's name is Brian.

Not that you aren't handsome and talented as the dickens yourself, but it's very misleading to see your name as the author of Daniel's vlog. Couldn't there at least be a permanent blurb tacked on to the beginning of each of Daniel's vlogs? Just a brief one or two line bio in italics with Daniel's first and last name in bold? 

His vlogs are incredibly good. In my opinion, they're the most professional and entertaining on AE. I won't be surprised when he gets a book deal for a collection of the text versions of these. If I had my druthers, he'd have a nationally syndicated column in all the major newspaper/magazines, too. And an HBO series based on his vlogs called, "That's A-More!"

It just seems incredibly wrong to have someone that talented go uncredited and to be mistaken for somone else (even if it's you!).

-Sibelius

"It's curtains for you, Dr. Horrible. Lacy, wafting curtains..."

David E is a Fraud!'s picture

OOOOPS!

...probably should have said a series on LOGO...

But while I'm here, I'd love to see AE do a feature story on Daniel.  Where'd this guy come from?

There's no doubt in my mind that if his vlogs continue to be as good as they've been, he's going to be a star.  He's got that 'everyman' cute face that obviously looks good on camera. He's certainly got the wit and insights gay men can appreciate...

I'd hate to see AE/LOGO lose his story to NBC.... <DOH!>

;^ )

-Sibelius

"It's curtains for you, Dr. Horrible. Lacy, wafting curtains..."

RJ's picture

Does Daniel not tell you his name in every vlog?

In the intro part of each of his vlogs, Daniel clearly states, "Mores for Gays  ...with Daniel Leary". Surely that should suffice. I think anyone who has watched at least TWO of Daniel's vlogs will figure out for themselves what his name is.

David E is a Fraud!'s picture

What are you thinking?

RJ wrote:

In the intro part of each of his vlogs, Daniel clearly states, "Mores for Gays  ...with Daniel Leary". Surely that should suffice. I think anyone who has watched at least TWO of Daniel's vlogs will figure out for themselves what his name is.

So it would be OK to:

  • package M&Ms in Milky Way wrappers because after you open a few, you'll figure it out
  • address your mail to your neighbor because clearly, your name is inside on the letter - that should suffice
  • google 'Mores For Gays" and have the first entry indicate that Brian is the author/creator like this

Branding and name recognition are important - especially for someone in the entertainment field.

Why do you feel it's OK for you to set the limits and say, "Surely, that should suffice" regarding the level of association of someone's name to their own work? And what qualifies you to be so "sure"?

To be fair, it's possible that Daniel might want to maintain a level of anonymity for reasons like... well, heck, I don't know! - it would be none of my business, anyway!  I'd be happy to apologize for stepping on his toes if that were the case.

-Sibelius

"It's curtains for you, Dr. Horrible. Lacy, wafting curtains..."

RJ's picture

Not sure what candy bars & mail have to do with Daniel's vlogs

I thought the issue was about folks thinking the Mores for Gays vlogs being the work of Brian Juergens.

I'll grant you the potential confusion on Google's listing but anyone who watches one of the vlogs can clearly see that Daniel is the person doing the vlog. The intros accompanying each vlog also mention Daniel by name. As Brian stated, he and Dennis post all the vlogs, so the same situation applies to all the other vlogs, including Two Gay Guys, Angry Puppy, Heidi Chronicles, Flaming Politics, etc. Aside from you and Mike, I don't recall anyone else being confused about who deserves credit for each vlog on this site.

Why do you feel it's OK for you to set the limits and say, "Surely, that should suffice" regarding the level of association of someone's name to their own work? And what qualifies you to be so "sure"?

Wow, that's a lot of analysis of what amounts to simply my opinion.

David E is a Fraud!'s picture

It's nice to see...

...that you've 'lowered the bar' on viewing requirements from two examples to just one. The 50% decrease in unnessesary digging is much appreciated!

I'm going to try to walk a fine line, here and not inadvertantly downplay the importance of AE's editors or the quality of the hard work they put into AE, but there is an elephant in the room: Editors don't get bylines unless they have also authored the piece.

In publishing, that's not an 'implied' or a 'sometimes it's done this way' type of scenario. Creating a byline using an editor's name indicates that the editor is also the author (which is often true for articles and vlogs on AE, but not in this case). No amount of saying, "that's how it's done here" changes the professionally-recognized conventions.

Editors get their own set of conventions regarding authorship, like square brackets, elipses and italics (i.e., [Brian Juergens - editor]) but they never include bylines. Bylines are reserved to indicate authorship only.

It's no surprise when a reader believes that the person listed in the byline is the creator of the piece. To my mind, it seems pretty unfair to single out any commenter for drawing that very logical and legitimate conclusion because it makes it seem like we're not yet 'in the club' of those who understand how differently things work here.

 

_______________________________________

-Sibelius

"It's curtains for you, Dr. Horrible. Lacy, wafting curtains..."

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Tony's picture

'Aside from you and Mike, I

'Aside from you and Mike, I don't recall anyone else being confused about who deserves credit for each vlog on this site. '

Add me to the list. I have an appalling memory and need to reference back after watching the vlog.. I mistakenly thought Daniel was Brian.

Rajah's picture

Dear  Daniel,

Dear  Daniel,

                     Apart from you being dashingly handsome (ok - you must admit - you are tooooooo cute...), you are truly interesting. I love your VLogs and watch religiously when they are posted here at afterelton.com. I was wondering though, how do you come up with your topics for your "Mores". Are they chosen randomly? Do you use comments to suggest new ones? I mean, if so - may I be so bold as to make a reccomendation:

"When is it appropriate to call your significant other: boyfriend, lover, partner, or 'husband'?"

 Anyway, please keep up the great work. It is such a pleasure to see you and confirm the idea that we are a society, one in which guidance is needed from time to time, and futher not cementing any stereotypes of our culture.

David E is a Fraud!'s picture

More Daniel...

For those (like me) who can't get enough...

Daniel at Caroline's Comedy Club in New York 

-Sibelius

"It's curtains for you, Dr. Horrible. Lacy, wafting curtains..."

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Bill S's picture

That standup clip was funny...

Now I gotta know: what Kelly Clarkson video was he in?

As for this vlog, it was probably his funniest so far!

David E is a Fraud!'s picture

The Video

Bill S wrote:

Now I gotta know: what Kelly Clarkson video was he in?

Kelly Clarkson - 'Walk Away' Video

 

__________________________________________

-Sibelius

"It's curtains for you, Dr. Horrible. Lacy, wafting curtains..."

atweaver's picture

How would you handle a

How would you handle a one-way mirror behind the urinals?

 

There is a bar in Overland Park, KS that has one. The women who know about it love to walkdown the hall and wave.