Queerview television guide for May 3rd

I'm up for some light fare right about now, folks -- I'm still reeling from the one-two punch of this week's Work Out episode and finally watching the Six Feet Under gay-bashing ep where Billy fakes his suicide and Claire has a moment of clarity in the guidance counselor's office and Rico is a homophobe and OMG I'm going to melt right now. Bring on the camp!

The Ellen Degeneres Show (Syndicated) Check local listings
Today Ellen welcomes Nathan Lane onto her show. Did you know that his latest Broadway role was the title character of a play called Butley? Eeeeeew! Jon Bon Jovi will also be a guest, so get ready to throw your panties at the screen. Woo-hoooo!

The Tyra Banks Show (Syndicated) Check local listings
Today Tyra welcomes some of the current cast of Celebrity Fit Club onto her show, including Maureen McCormick (Marsha, Marsha, Marshmallow!), Ross the Insanely Gay Intern (disclaimer: he could very well be straight, for all we know), professional mall-rat Tiffany, and an apparent celebrity named Kimberly Locke. Expect Tyra to ask each of them to "kiss her fat ass" (her words, not mine!).

Ugly Betty (ABC) 8:00PM EDT
Two words, people: Medieval Times. Or is it "sex addict"? Or maybe "unceremonious deportation"... or "corporate espionage", "vulnerable transsexual", "overachieving assistant", or "dirty secret". Whatever -- all I know is that in the previews for tonight's episode, Marc (Michael Urie) and Wilhelmina (Vanessa Williams, fresh off her career high on last night's Shear Genius -- NOT) get into a slap-fight that features the sound effect of cats screaming at each other. And that's just about as good as it gets.