Two-Bite Interview: Madame and Joe Kovacs

Those of us that had televisions or pulses before, say, 1984 no doubt have what might seem to be acid flashback memories of a smack-talking matron puppet and a gay man in a tux popping up on shows like Solid Gold and Hollywood Squares. Far from being a figment of our imaginations, Madame (with help from her creator, Wayland Flowers) was a staple of variety television for years -- and at one point even had her own sitcom. But after Flowers sadly passed away in 1988, it seemed as though Madame might be a thing of the bawdy, bejeweled past.

But recently she found a new partner in Joe Kovacs, and the two have been popping up on VH1, at awards events, and in live shows in NYC and across the country (for more info on where the trash-talking twosome are playing next, check out their website).

We were able to collar Madame and Joe mere days before their final NYC show (Madame with an E runs through Tuesday at legendary cabaret Don't Tell Mama's) and ask a few questions about the new pairing, the scene, and what's up next.

AfterElton: So Madame, you've been out of the scene for two decades. How have things changed since you've been gone?

Madame: Did you just call me OLD? Two decades? My word…has it been that long? Where did all the time go? It seems like just 20 years ago I was a big star on the television. I even had my very own sitcom in the 80s called Madame's Place. Now, who the hell remembers that?

As for a change in the "scene" … at my age, as long as I'm "seen", I'm doing pretty damn good. Honestly, I have been around the block. Well honey, actually, I've been around the block so many times I've worn down the corners. But I do love a good party. Hell… I've even loved a few bad parties. I have always been a swing'n party girl. If I skip dinner and do a few body shots off a go-go boy, I'll be topless and tripping over the pattern in the rug in no time.

But these days, the boys are so much younger and cuter, not that I'm complaining you see. Honey, how many times does 24 go into 72 ? I'd say four times… if it's a good night.

AE: I see you've got a new man on your arm (or is that the other way around?) -- how did you two meet?

M: Who, this guy? I can barely remember his name… (to Joe) just kidding, cupcake, you know I love ya. His name is Joe Kovacs, he is my new friend and confidant. We met three years ago at an artists studio in mid-town Manhattan. There I was, standing on a pedestal, bathed in artificial sunlight. I was posing for a portrait and Joe just happened to stop by. Well, being the thoughtful soul he is, he opened a little cupboard, got out an ironing board and iron and said he'd be happy to take care those horrible wrinkles in my pantsuit. Unfortunately… I was posing in the NUDE!

Kovacs is a dear sweet man and he is always there to lend a helping hand… or two.

AE: A lot of folks have fond memories of you when you were performing with Wayland, your first love. How is your new act different?

M: Oh yes, Wayland Flowers… I met Wayland here in New York in the late 60s and we worked together until his passing in 1988. I miss him every day, but as they say "the show must go on." I've been out of the bright lights of stardom for so long and comedy has changed so much… Let us say my new act is slowly evolving. Someone once said "you can't teach and old dog new tricks." Well kitten, I say if you leave an extra fifty on the nightstand I'll… oh sorry… different kind of tricks.

But kids, if you come to my show, I'll give you jokes and songs… hell, I'm gonna give you all that I've got! So you may need a shot of penicillin when it's over, just be warned.

AE: What are your plans for the future -- are you going to storm Hollywood? Release a sex tape?

M: Darling, like Valerie Bertinelli on Jenny Craig, I'm taking it One Day At A Time. But honey, if there's a stray copy of that VHS tape from that torrid night at the Motel 6 in Boca… I'll pay top dollar to keep it out of the wrong hands.

AfterElton: It must be tough to step into the shoes of Madame's original partner. Or are you a different pair of shoes altogether?

Joe Kovacs: Well, "If the shoe fits…" and luckily for me, this old shoe fits like a glove. Wayland let Madame be the star and it's up to me now to let her star shine once again and stay out of her way as much as possible.

AE: How have the gays responded to Madame's return thus far? Do a lot of folks have fond memories of the old bag?

JK: I've had the pleasure of meeting so many wonderful people that where fans of Madame. They, like me, are overjoyed that Madame is returning to the spotlight. Fans will say "hi" and ask Madame if she remembers them and the things they did together in LA in the 80s or Provincetown in 70s. Thank goodness, for my sake, she was as high as a kite through most of it and remembers very little of the old days.

AE: How does Madame measure up to other co-stars that you've had?

JK: Madame is a doll to work with plus she is only about three feet tall. Over the years I've worked with numerous seven foot tall bears, the odd eight foot ogre and one very heavy, needy, drunken, bingo-calling drag queen. It's nice to finally work with a partner that is obsessively thin and fits in the overhead compartment on an aircraft.

Thanks to Madame and Joe for taking the time to chat with us. If you're in NYC this coming Tuesday, be sure to check out the show -- t's a hoot!