Okay, when I think of timeless design and endless love, I don’t think any of the following words: Las Vegas, dice, casino, rockabilly.

Tragically, the couple whose wedding reception was this week’s Design Star challenge didn’t feel that way, and thus a hellish red, black, lavender and white wedding was born, designed by the most irritating contestant of all, Robb, who observed when the challenge was announced, “I’ve never done a wedding before.”

It’s my most fervent hope he never does another, but given that the judges keep not sending him home, I don’t think that hope’s going to be realized any time soon.

Last week, one of this season’s two gay contestants, Santa Barbara wedding and event planner Scott Corridan, got canceled, which is an irony and a shame because I’m very sure that this tragic design could have benefited greatly from a nice gay wedding planner like Scott. The queer sensibility was left up to the always-sparklicious Josh Johnson, and for my money, he’s the one I’d have hired to do my Vegas wedding if, one, the laws of our nation were changed to recognize my right to marry, and two, I were drugged and forced at gunpoint to get married in Las Vegas.

But this isn’t about my big lesbian wedding, it’s about Stephanie and Bruno’s big traditional fairy tale princess rockabilly Vegas casino wedding. The remaining designers had one night to come up with a presentation for the happy couple, and all the designers pull an all-nighter so they'll be ready for the 6 AM presentation.

Each designer presents his or her idea to Bruno and Stephanie, who rank the presentations and choose the one they want for their actual wedding reception. Christina, who I’ve never been wild about, had been appropriately horrified at the groom’s rockabilly casino idea, and did what smart wedding planners have been doing for generations and ignored the groom and focused on giving the bride the fairy tale white and lavender wedding she’d asked for. I’m sure it was totally unprofessional of her and it got her booted off the show in the first ten minutes, but I went from finding her annoying to shouting “You go girl!” just in time to see her, well …. Go. Sigh. This show hates me.

This was the moment I had a very bad feeling about our boy Josh, who is not looking as sparkly as he did when the show began. The bride and groom don’t seem enamored of his presentation, and I couldn’t get a feeling for how it was supposed to look from the camera angles we were given on it.

Things got much worse when the bride, she of the fairy tale princess lavender and white wedding, told Robb she loved the gigantic red spinning dice that framed the entrance to the reception hall. Possibly she and I have different concepts of “fairy tale,” “princess,” and “lavender.” And then there were the lavender feather boas he had tied to the back of each chair, which made my eyes bleed.

So, the designers appear before the panel of judges and we find out Stephanie and Bruno have chosen Robb’s hellish design. Vern asks him what the couple asked for, and he sums it up as “rockabilly and formal, red and lavender.” He called it a “design nightmare,” and that’s exactly what he gave them, too.

So that was the design part. The execution part was even more painful, because Robb was just as irritating and dictatorial and manipulative as ever, proving yet again that I’m really not the target audience of reality competition television because I could do with several pounds less drama and personality and a few tons more actual design. Like, oh, I don’t know, last year’s Design Star? Just a thought, HGTV.

The judges asked the other designers what they thought about Robb’s design. Josh said he thought there was too much going on and it should have been more “princess like.” Oh Josh. Of course it should have. If it was the wedding of someone with taste and a gay wedding planner.

Vern asked if everyone contributed equally and Robb threw Will under the train, saying he didn’t really do much. This is the point at which I gave up on this show, because you see, I don’t care what Robb says about the other contestants. I don’t think the judges should care either. I think they should care about the design talent, how well they carry it out, and how the designer would come across on television. Given those criterion, every single person sent home so far would still be there, and Robb would have washed out on day one. Therefore, those aren’t the actual criterion being used.

Anyway, after all that sniping and shopping and tulle-stapling, the designers were done, Stephanie and Bruno exercised their federally protected right to do something I’m prevented from doing, and then the happy couple entered the reception hall for the first time, where 75 of their closest friends and family members were waiting.

They loved it. Bruno gushed, “This is totally awesome. Thank you.” Stephanie singled out the feather boas on the chairs for praise. I think longingly of David Bromstad and last season and actual design talent.

Robb, Kim, and Todd (who kept his shirt on this week, amazingly) are patted on the head and told they’re still in the challenge. They go to the Green Room to wait.

Will and Josh and are standing there, waiting to see which one is going home. Josh looks extremely nervous, and Will looks worried. Clive points out that the two of them have developed a really close bond (and it’s true, their chemistry is phenomenal). Will says, choking up a little, “I wouldn’t rather be standing beside anyone else.” They hug.

The judges tell Josh he’s an excellent shopper but has problems with actual design, and they cancel him. In a way I’m glad, because now I no longer have to watch this show. But I’m actually not glad, because he was without question my favorite of all the contestants and he really deserves to be a star.

Oh, and when Will comes into the Green Room and Robb sees he made it through another week? He groans, “You’ve got to be kidding.” What a class act.

Since they’ve de-gayed the show, I won’t be recapping it beyond this week. Next week they’re doing Wayne Newton’s house. I hope Will wins. I’d watch his show, especially if Josh co-hosted it with him. Until then, I’m sticking with Color Splash and re-runs of last season's Design Star.

New episodes of Design Star air on HGTV on Sunday nights at 9 ET/PT, and are repeated frequently throughout the week. You can also watch the previous week’s episode on the Design Star website, where you’ll also find backstage footage and exit interviews, and can rate the designs yourself.