"The Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency" recaplet (Ep. 4.03): Guess who's coming to dinner?

Previously on The Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency, Kehoe got naked, Kehoe forced his way into the new model house, Kehoe got in a fight with newbie Chandler and finally, Kehoe auditioned for the Kentucky Jeans shoot. Guess how this week begins?

Kehoe, in his element underwear

With Kehoe getting naked and showering in the model house pool!  He proves that even if you wake up with morning wood, the pool causes major shrinkage - this boy has issues.  Crystal called him out in the most perfect way: "You can put a shower cap on but you can't cover your %@#$" (There's a cap of it after the break, as it's a wee bit racy an image for you to be gazing at over your morning coffee, believe me.)

In non-Kehoe related news (because I hate giving him more attention), my Ex-TV BF and current gay fave Martin Ritchie spends the beginning of the episode feeling left out because if his enterpreter isn't present, the other models forget to write down what they're saying ... sadly, I have a sinking suspision that this is going to carry over into his first JDMA/Kentucky Jeans shoot.

Janice spends a good portion of the episode obsessively cleaning and trying to make everyone's bed with her "bitch nails" - guess what?  Her OCD is not going to fly in a house with 15 skanky models. Who knew Janice was such a germophobe and ugly American?

Ugly American?  Why's that, Dan?  Well I'll tell you why, kids: Hands down my favorite part of the first half of the episode was Janice ignorantly talking slowly, loudly and closely to her newest protege, Hazuki Kato, as if the girl barely understands the words coming out of her mouth.  She may be Asian, Janice, but that doesn't mean she can't comprehend and speak perfect English.  It's horrible but it's hysterical.  I rewound Janice telling Hazuki she needs to cut her hair about five times, I could not believe it!

If Kehoe got naked earlier in the episode, then it must be time for Janice to rip poor Traci apart for being fat again.  I love that we've gone 4 seasons and this is still an issue. Do you guys think Traci is big?  I mean, she's not Kate Moss thin but she's far from Carnie Wilson.  

At the Kentucky Jeans shoot things finally got really gay!  Some half-naked man-on-man, down-on-the-farm wrasslin' took place between Kehoe and smokin' hot Dominic. 

Dominic rassles Kehoe

It's as if Dom was reading my mind because it only took a minute before he went all UFC on Kehoe and slammed the kid to the ground, injuring his foot.  Suck it up, pal.

Later in the shoot, the lovely editors of JDMA had me all in a tizzy because I though my fears had come to fruition.  Martin's inability to hear the art direction really looked like it was going to become a real issue ... not so much. Sure the clients were apprehensive at first but in the end they loved the John Deere stripper pole action.

Dominic and Martin ride it hard

After the high and success of Martin's first shoot my heart sank the minute Janice walked onto set.  As you know, she's notorious for causing chaos and catfights whenever she's on set so I feared the worst.  Sadly, there was nothing but big smiles and bear hugs all around.  The most controversial moment came when she referred to her son as Nathan Fields instead of "my son" Nathan.  Is she trying to hide the nepotism after 4 seasons of the show?  A little late for that, sister.

Back at the house, Xian decided to cook a big "surprise" meal for Janice and the rest of the models.  Somehow she took that "surprise" moment to turn it around and "surprise" the models herself.  Guess who's coming to dinner, kids?  A cosmetic dentist and a hair stylist.  I almost feel like they've been presented with something from the Supermodel Make a Wish Foundation.  I see bleaching, waxing, cutting and snaggle-tooth fixing in their futures but enough about extreme makeovers, let's see what Brian Kehoe is up to...

Kehoe skinnydips showers in the pool... buck nekked

Well, he's still pissing everyone off but at least he has the common sense to do it in his underwear!  First he's complaining about the shower drains being clogged, then Xian tells him that if he annoys her any longer she's going to rip his you know what's off.  Seconds later Traci rips him a new one for not listening and for being disrespectful and yadda yadda yadda ... let's look at some hot models in bed!

Chandler maxes and relaxes

Paul Vandervort's chest needs its own show

Have we tuned Kehoe out yet?  No?  How about we look at some more fine specimens then...

Maurice and Kehoe - my what a big bat you have!

Chandler bends over and pumps it

I love that randomly our O.G. (original gay) J.P. Calderon stops by and just stares at Chandler as he works out. When asked "what's going on?" J.P. simply notes that's he's just enjoying the view! Right?  Good to see you for two whole seconds J.P. ... thank goodness we have another gay to follow.

Martin made another appearance toward the end of the show to say that even though he's deaf he can hear how frakkin loud and disruptive Kehoe is.  I was rollin' ... that is until he stuck some fruit down his pants and started screaming for J.P. to take notice.  He's a charmer, that one.

I'll spare you all the details but in the end, Kehoe told Crystal to do some blow to lose weight but it ended up with half-shirt security boy Sorin kicking Kehoe's ass to the curb. I doubt we're lucky enough for it to be a permanent vacation but I'll take what I can get.  

In terms of mancandy, this was the best episode of Season 4.  I mean, just look at all the skin we saw this week!  The skin to drama ratio was pretty even and that makes me a happy man.  What did you guys think?