"Top Design 2" recaplet (Ep. 2.02): Bunker? I hardly know her!

Previously on Top Design 2, we were introduced to the newest crop of designers and there's half a bushel of gays up in the joint this season! We learned that Ricky Schroder's wife is kind of an overbearing shrew of a woman which is sad, really, because he seems like a doll face (with a nice behind). We now have first hand knowledge that despite what you may have heard, there can be too many gays decorating a room. 

Lastly, we learned that my favorite reality elimination phrase was axed in the Top Design revamp. RIP "See You Later Decorator".

This week starts off in the Designer lofts and all the gays are recapping their big losses before they are quickly whisked away to their studio workspaces by host India Hicks and mentor Todd Oldham.  Each designer has to share a tiny 12'x14' space with another designer but these are not just any small rooms ... these are fallout shelters. 

Instantly I'm wondering which gay will break out in song: "Let's do it for our country, the red, white and the blue..."  Ah, Grease 2 ... how I love thee. Oh, and if you're wondering which gay started singing first, apparently that was me.

It's no "Cool Rider" but I still love it!

The pairs hit their fallout shelters and start rethinking the celebration of atom smashing CERN tests thinking about what they'd like to live with for the rest of their lives.  Nature, privacy, spa-like tranquility ... Only two of the gays are bunking up (pun intended) and they've already adapted to co-habitation and being in a relationship:  #1 (Nathan) is already calling #6 (Wisit) honey, isn't that adorable?  This is how the world ends: not with a big bang, but with a soft gay whisper.

Nathan and Wisit sitting in a tree...

Checking in on the other gays, I'm starting to see a pattern developing with #3 (Robert) ... remember how last week he was very bitchy confrontational to #5 (Preston)?  Well this week he's decided to butt heads with his cellmate Jennifer.  I think it might be time for #3 to meet #86 — I'm so over this guy.

The teams head out to Plummer's to do a little pre-post-apocolyptic shopping and it's pretty boring except for the part where Jennifer steals the pillows right out from under Schroder and #4 (Eddie)'s pretty little noses.  You should see the way #4 flitted about screaming "Someone stole our f*&#ing pillows" — the hills were alive. 

Off to Pier 1 where, shocker, people bought wicker!  What else can one buy in Pier 1 Imports but wicker?  Oi that store...

Back in the bunkers I've found new love for Nathan and Wisit.  Their Ozzie and Harriet schtick could be a brand new sitcom for RKO.  They're killing me!

OMG, Schroder just mentioned that she's married to Ricky Schroder again ... we get it, hon, no need to rub our faces in it.  Well, if you were to rub our faces in "it", we really wouldn't complain.

Ricky Schroder, he's married in case you hadn't heard

As we head into the break, it dawns on me — where the hell did the producers find a real fallout shelter?  I'm so intrigued by the location that I can't concentrate on the show.  I mean, is it a big warehouse?  Is it really underground?  If so, how far?  Is Julianne Moore living there with the rest of the Safe crazies?  Enquiring minds want to know.

The Judges arrive and start going through the bunkers and I'm beyond excited that it looks like Kelly Wearstler may be off her meds this week.  She looks like Tippi Hedren's stunt double from The Birds meets Holly Golightly with that crazy hat and I heart her!  

The Birds attack Kelly Wearstler

The Ozzie and Harriet Show is a big hit with Kelly and Adler.  Wisit and Nathan are planning on getting married prior to entering the bunker and they even have a contingency plan for when Nathan's been a bad boy.  Given that they only have one bed, I guess the couch will be home when someone's in the doghouse.  These two have stolen the show (even if their bunker has not).

My favorite bunker of the night was Shaz and Big Daddy (#2)'s spa-inspired den of tranquility.  I loved the flow of the room, the decluttered yet homey asthetic.  Plus, I'm a sucker for blue and brown together, so...

My least favorite bunker had to be Schroder and #4's This Old Bunker what with all its fake antiques, country shelves and handpainted mural.  There's nothing I hate more than a wall mural that looks like a blind child made it.  Hideous.  If I had to look at that for 50 years, I'd gladly take a walk into the not-so-fresh air and glow of radiation.

Apparently my interior design taste isn't up to par with that of the Adlers, Wearstlers, Hickses and Russells of the world because This Old Bunker won!  Schroder and Eddie won ... I'm stunned.  

I was in need of a little pick-me-up so I rewound a minute to the point where Jonathan Adler called Wisit and Nathan's shared marital bed "jadorable" — it's a catch phrase I can get behind and it makes me smile.  This Old Bunker won, this is ridonk.

In the end, the Judges decided that they could not live with Jennifer and #3's boring bunker so both of them went home.

#3 and Jennifer hug it out for the first and last time

That's the first gay contestant eliminated from the competition and I really don't care.  It's not like the show made me want to care about Robert.  Last week they barely focused on the man and when the did, they made him out to be an excuse-loving confrontation whore.  The power of editing I guess. 

We still have 5 more gays to root for in the competition and I want your thoughts on the designs and, more importantly, on the boys we're left with.  Who is your favorite and who would you like to see go next?