Top Design 2 has a chance at a rebirth and I'm expecting the show to look exactly like Bravo's sister show, Top Chef.  Sadly, nothing too shocking and new from the get-go because the show starts like every other reality show on earth does, by introducing the designers — how avante garde of them.  Let the gays roll in!

Gay #1 - Nathan is first up and if I have to stare at that little condom on his head all season I'm going to start a letter-writing campaign to have him removed. He looks a little like our own Brian Juergens if he was put in a blender with Mythbusters' Jamie Hyneman but not really because I'm going to get in trouble so I'll shut up now.

Brian + Jamie = Nathan

Gay #2 - Kerry aka Big Daddy strolls in. They skip right past Gay #3 - Robert to focus on Gay #4 - Eddie, who has been working as the Senior Stylist for Martha Stewart Living Magazine. Maybe we'll learn about Robert later in the show.

What was that all about anyway? Don't get me wrong, skipping Robert meant that we could focus on Andrea Schroder who has been lucky enough to bed Ricky Schroder for the last decade or two (we hate her) so I'm not complaining ... yet I'm now sort of obsessed with the whole Robert omission.

Gay #5 - Preston already seems to be an online fan fave (could it be that he looks shockingly like a cross between Ricky Martin and ex-JDMA model and adult star Rodrigo?) but he's a little too pretty for my taste and honestly there's a part of me that wonders why Robert's so obviously being ignored so I kind of don't care that Preston's even walked in the room.  Does Robert have a speech impediment or better yet no tongue?  This is killing me here...

Gay #6 - Wisit the wannabe Opera singer scares me a little. Surely his freaky singing talent can't be worse than whatever Robert brings to the table. Alas intros are over and we didn't learn much about #3.  Is that some not so subtle foreshadowing?

New host India Hicks and former host turned new "mentor" Todd Oldham (think Tim Gunn) greet the designers and explain that their first challenge will test each designer's ability to showcase their style and the needs of a specific client while working in groups. I don't know that it's fair to force them into groups right away but on the other hand it's a great way to see which stereotype each contestant will fit into. 

Robert aka #3
 

Maybe Robert aka #3 is the raving psycho diva who will smash a lamp ten minutes before the reveal and threaten to cut numbers 4 through 6!  This is a fun game! Play along at home...

The Red Team consists of Teresa, Ondine, Wisit aka #6 and Nathan aka #1.  The Green Team is Shazia, Andrea and Straight Serge.  The Gay Blue Team is comprised of all gays: Big Daddy aka Kerry aka #2, Preston aka #5 and Robert (who finally gets his moment in the spotlight ... sadly, nothing breaks and no one gets hurt).  Maybe they can be some Gay Super Group or something ... like n*sync!  Team Orange is Jennifer, Eddie aka #4 and Natalie. 

Thank the heavens I've numbered, labeled and shelved everyone into neat little boxes in my head, otherwise this could get confusing.  The rainbow of fruit flavors all head off to some warehousey loft spaces and meet their first clients aka The Judges.

Orange gets Jonathan Adler ("Chic and Dreamy"), Red Kelly Wearster ("Form over Function"), Blue is stuck with hard as nails Margaret Russell ("Crisp and Glamorous") and Green welcomes Host/Judge India Hicks ("Caribbean Classic") as their guide.

These kids only have 2 days and $2,000 to decorate the entire room minus paint, fabric, wall coverings and flooring — is this Top Design or Trading Spaces?  If Frank comes walking through that door with some sea shells, a sponge and his wife (cough!) and demands a country crock mural, I'm outta here. 

At the designer apartment, India and Jonathan surprise the gang with a quick "Pop Design" Challenge which must be incorporated into their room and will factor into final judging.  The winners of the "Pop Design" will have immunity for the first round.  They have to make shadow boxes ... no, seriously ... shadow boxes.  I'm certain Paige Davis is going to pop around the corner and scare the bejesus out of everyone with her perky smile and hot glue gun.

India, Margaret and Token Straight Serge

Gays #2, #4 and #6 join Ondine in the winners circle and while I should be celebrating the major gay domination, I can't help continue laughing at the fact that Mrs. Schroder doesn't know what a peace symbol looks like.  Jonathan Adler thinks it might be a Mercedes logo.  Genius!

The actual design challenge is pretty boring. All of the excitement rests on two teams. First Schroder orders all the wrong wallpaper then her teammate Shaz lets the sink overflow, ruining all the fabric and wallpaper.  They can't catch a break and after all of Schroder's bossy bossenstein antics I'm hoping they'll fail. 

In comparison, you didn't even need a match to burn down the house the gays build.  Team Gay Blue self destructs without much fan fare.  #3 can't figure out how to use a sewing machine or an electric screwdriver.  #5 doesn't know how to paint within the lines and wastes half his day scrubbing the cement floors.  (Not to be cliche but I did have visions of Joan Crawford forcing him to the floor and making him scrub until he bled.(  Then there is Big Daddy who spends the whole time trying to avoid the drama within his team. 

Overall, I thought the rooms were very lackluster.  Team Orange scored with Jonathan thanks to the bed for his dog Liberace, though he did call it a little Golden Girls.  Team Gay Blue missed the mark completely which makes me question how many gays it takes to redecorate a room ... I thought the more the merrier but obviously that's not the case.  The Green team may not want to unpack because their dirty, off-kilter and unfinished look sucked.  Not to mention that it's quite possible someone's got a hit out on Schroder.  I wonder how long it takes for Ricky to fire up that train and come to the rescue. The Red Team was hands down my favorite design: there was such elegance and continuity. As Jonathan Adler would say, it was "jadorable."  Red FTW!

Green's losing crack-house design / Red's winning design

Judging: No shocker here, Red Team wins for their inspired Kelly Wearstler design.  The bottom two teams are Blue and Green.  Team Gay Blue has two members up for elimination and they're up against Serge and Shaz.

In the end Serge goes home and the biggest disappointment of the night comes when he leaves without Jonathan Adler getting the chance to utter his famous catchphrase: "See you later decorator" ... and that's a change I cannot live with.  It was so ridiculously gay and catchy that honestly I almost cried when the episode ended without hearing it.  Unacceptable. 

I can take the changes and the duplication of a formula that works (Top Chef and Runway standards). In fact I love most of them but I cannot believe they'd get rid of "See you later decorator" - that's like watching Project Runway without hearing Tim Gunn say "Carry on!"   

What did you guys think?  Do you like the tinkering they've done with format?  Do you like Todd Oldham as a "mentor"?  Are you crushed that Adler's catchphrase got the axe?  Let us know what you think!