Afternoon Meme: Barney Stinson Leers, Cats Sleep Deep, Plus Flying Cars and Betty White

Sorry all you Scooter fans, there were no clips available from last night's How I Met Your Mother. But I did manage to find Barney explaining the Hottest Professions in History. It was surprisingly bawdy for 8pm.

In what may be the most disturbing Oscar promotion in recent memory, Lopez Tonight will all week long have the cast of Jersey Shore reenact scenes from all the Best picture nominees. They began with The Hurt Locker.

Jay Leno knows he's not well liked. So for his cold open last night for his return to late night, he enlisted imagery from America's most beloved movie, his favorite homosexual, and the world's favorite Golden Girl. He won the ratings, but based on the rest of the show, I'm not sure it was good that a lot of people saw it.

Slate doesn't seem to understand movies. As I keep reading about the theater in Korea showing Avatar in 4D, they're advocating the new trend in films is 1D. With familiar audio, it's like some hipster minimalist New York City experience.

We may not have a flying car yet, but this guy is trying to sell a flying boat that goes on land, sea and air. He's trying to sell it for $14k. I can have a flying car/boat thingy for less than a Kia? I take it!

If you're going to go, go big. I present the Bigaloo, the world's largest igloo. Frankly, in my yard, this would require less construction, and more tunneling. Have you not noticed my switch to sunny, tropical header pictures? Somebody offer me a job somewhere warm!

We may be several months away from SyFy's Sharktopus, but we have a preview for Dinoshark. I think we can blame SyFy for Troma Entertainment not being a player anymore - they steal all the good (bad) material!

Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time has put out a new featurette, and I'm starting to think we've been sold a bill of goods about the beefcake factor on Jake Gyllenhaal. His outfits and such have been disappointingly modest in all the footage to this point.

Jimmy Fallon continues to mock Twilight, so I don't have to. Yesterday, he had some help sitting in a tree and emoting about nothing. To be honest, I think Robert Pattinson gets how ridiculous the character is. Fun fact - these trees are on the 12th floor garden of 30 Rockerfeller Center, which is almost high enough to keep Robert Pattinson safe from fans.

Andy Cohen sat down with Joan Rivers on Watch What Happens Live to discuss Olympic fashion. I'll be upfront: I am not a fan of the jokes, I think the gay jokes and the serial lesbian jokes are lazy an unfunny. But you guys say I have no sense of humor, so I'll let you judge.

The Daily Show with Jon Stewart discussed a lot of things last night, and I seem to be in the minority thinking the important segment was on how this jacka** Senator Jim Bunning can single-handedly hold up extensions of unemployment benefits for the millions of Americans who need them. Look - if one insane old man in government can cause millions to go hungry, we are no longer America, we are now a totalitarian state, and should be ashamed of ourselves. Oh, and Stewart, your "homo say what?" was lazy - lazy and beneath you.

As was pointed out in my Alice In Wonderland article, Tim Burton has a formula for making movies, and it hits sometimes, but others, it's kind of obvious.

This video of a tree branch falling on power lines was far more effective than the "Louie the Lightening Bug" commercials about safety that ran when I was a kid.

This is the world's laziest cat. He has many who would like to challenge the title, but this cat is serious about his rest.

E.T.A. is a lovely short film about Marvin, who has the world's most boring job, ever. But this has more than one twist.

Finally, we have the ingredients in Eskimo ice cream. The cute, adorable tasty ingredients.