Afternoon Meme: Alan Cumming Excommunicated, "The Hobbit" Gets a Script, Signing Over Your Soul, and My Future Ex-Husband

Derrick Martin's prom didn't implode, previewing USoT, Vampire Bill licks his lips, MTV Movie Awards get their man, and the Star Wars comedy gets a setting.

Parks and Recreation star Aziz Ansari has officially been tapped to host the MTV Movie Awards in June, produced by Mark Burnett. I don’t watch the show, but at least his statement was cute: “I’m so happy Ronnie from Jersey Shore was unavailable and this exciting opportunity was able to come my way.”

Alan Cumming says that after he spoke publicly about becoming an atheist, he received a letter from the Church of Scotland asking him to leave the church or be excommunicated. "You're fired!" "I quit last week."

The Razzies want their award back from Sandra Bullock. They haven’t reevaluated her performance in All About Steve from the DVDs she brought everybody, it’s just that they don’t normally give away the actual statue – there’s only one real Razzie Award, winners normally get to buy a plastic $5 replica. But Sandra left with the original.

Unemployment is about to go up, because somebody at Apple left a 4^th generation iPhone at a bar, and it’s been found and disassembled over at Gizmodo. Unfortunately, it seems that the phone was registered in Mobile.Me, and Apple bricked the phone remotely.

Will the new animated Star Wars comedy that Seth Green is producing be set after Return of the Jedi? If that's the case, it could give a lot more freedom to the writers since that aspect of canon has mostly just been explored in books and not onscreen.

Rollingstone.com is about to relaunch, and it will have every back issue online for your perusal – if you’re will to pay for it. Now that Rollingstone.com is back under Wenner’s control (as opposed to RealNetworks), you’ll have to pay to get access to content, and being a print subscriber isn’t a free pass to the web content. I just removed it from my bookmarks.

After the failure of an arranged marriage for their female meerkat, a British couple has set up an online dating site for their pet to find love.

Peter Jackson has finally turned in the scripts to both The Hobbit movies to MGM, and is waiting for the studio greenlight to start production. It seems everything we’d been hearing about the project was just rumor, because they couldn’t do anything until scripts were done.

For an April Fool’s Day prank, British gaming site GameStation changed their Terms of Service requiring users to bequeath their immortal souls to the site to sign up. Turns out 88% of users agreed, which proves either how few people read online contracts, or the value of a soul these days. Courts do consider clicking “I Agree” to be a legally binding contract.

Don’t feel like working today? I wasted all morning at Most Awesome Thing Ever. You may want to turn down your speakers.

Gwyneth Paltrow has dropped out of The Danish Girl, about transgender painter Einar Wegener. She was to play the wife of the painter (Nicole Kidman). The reason given was a change in filming location she found incompatible with her children. Previously Charlize Theron had dropped out of the role. Personally I think they decided indie pay wasn't enough to try and figure out if Nicole was changing her facial expressions.

I’ve been having trouble following this, but Olympic gold medalist Matthew Mitcham was in Mexico enroute to a diving “grand prix” in Europe that was canceled due to the volcano. The Mexican authorities stepped up and held the competition there, and our unicorn took silver to Chinese Qui Bo’s gold.

Not everything prom related turns out bad, as Georgia teen Derrick Martin attended his dance over the weekend. While there was tight security at the dance itself, everything seemed to go off without a hitch.

Bollywood star Celina Jaitley opened India’s largest GLBT film festival over the weekend in Mumbai that will showcase 110 films from 25 countries around the world.

The Berkley Repertory Theater has opened Girlfriend, about the life of a gay teenager. Deliberately rough around the edges, it’s been garnering mostly favorable reviews for the charm and energy.

After getting called out on cheating with an optical illusion this morning, I did manage to come up with this trick of perspective that may qualify.

Where's the floor?

I always felt that cherubs were evil.

The bird is obviously American, feeding the kid portions that large.

This bag was used for buyers of a new murder mystery novel.

I've known some men that caused sparks. Or lit up my life.

I always see things like this and wish I was creative enough to do this on the fly.

From the world of advertising, we have FedEx.

And your moment of cute.

I'd like to introduce you to my future ex-husband, Barrett Foa. Barrett has done a lot of theater, including Avenue Q, but now he's appearing as a geek on NCIS: Los Angeles, which is why he was on The Bonnie Hunt Show today. I'm just a sucker for a nerdy, funny guy.

The United States of Tara seems to be all about Tara and Max tonight from the preview, with Marshall's biggest storyline being flushing the toilet.

True Blood has released another "Waiting Sucks" video, this one for Vampire Bill. It does beg the question though - what does the fake blood taste like? Has the vampire movie/television boom led to research in the field, and now you can get different flavors based on what the actors like? Inquiring minds want to know.

This video about a pair of mountain climbers reminded me of what it was like outside, where the evil pollen lives.  Still, mountain climbers like surfers always sound so calm and Zen - how do I get me some of that philosophy?

This inclusive commercial from the traditionally inclusive UCC has been making the rounds, but I felt I should share - I've been accused of being anti-religion, and well, that's not untrue. But I'm all for people having positive influences they feel they need in their lives. As religions go, the UCC isn't a bad choice.

Body wax for charity? Only in Australia, mate!