Big Brother recap: Tension, dissension, apprehension began a long, long time ago

At the moment, I'm loving whoever sent that banner for offering a better twist to the season than anything the Big Brother producers have come up with, so far. That banner created more drama than the "enemies" twist or America's Player (or, rather, it gave us all the drama the America's Player twist has, so far, failed to bring).

The great part is that the banner was sent while the show was running an endurance HoH competition. Usually, if a plane carrying a banner is spotted, the producers will force the houseguests to wait inside, but whoever chartered that plane sent it over at a time when they couldn't be sent inside. Even better, it turned out the houseguests were made to spend this endurance competition hanging upside down, staring at the sky. Considering what control freaks the Big Brother producers can be, there's a delicious schadenfreude to seeing their will thwarted.

The middle part of the banner saying that, "Amber & Eric are liars!" was the effective part, inspiring the next chapter of "What's Amber crying about now?" Amber tells the Diary Room, "I can't even lie, I can't even try to lie. I just can't. The words can't come out if they're a lie. Just to see that, my name involved with the word liar -- why would people say that?" Maybe, among other things, they're referring to the time you told Nick that you didn't know he was going to be put up for eviction when you suggested it in the first place, Amber? Trying to prove the banner wrong, she swears on her daughter's life about her truthfulness. Somebody check on her family.

Eric's is more affected by the banner's accusation -- do you think that's because Amber cried her way out of suspicion or because she didn't come off as someone who could effectively plan out a web of lies meant to manipulate votes to her will (aka the incompetence defense)? He interviews that he "will be devastated if something that's entirely out of my control resulted in ... leaving." I'm not feeling very sympathetic since a good part of his game was about managing outside forces (the America's Player votes) along with his game. If he were going to get far this season as America's Player, shouldn't he be able to handle this sort of deal, as well?

Feeling the need to get back at someone for Nick's eviction, Danielle cries over the two votes to keep Nick. Since neither vote came from her, Dick or Amber, the vote could have gone the other way if not for the current "Vote with the house or else" attitude that rules this season -- if all three had enough backbone to voted the way they wanted, Kail would have gone home instead. Thus, I'm not feeling much sympathy for how Danielle was "forced" to vote out "her best friend in the house" because it's this lemming-like behavior that has made the eviction episodes so damn boring. She decides the first odd vote was an attempt to cast suspicion on Nick, while this latest odd vote was an attempt to cast suspicion on her and to get her evicted. (Again, that's a stratagem that would only work with this paranoid cast and their "If you don't vote with us, you're against us" attitude.)

Thanks to the banner, Danielle decides that Eric made those mystery votes, but has also been in an alliance with Kail and was the true mastermind of the alliance. I'm finding this a bit funny since the same sense of paranoia that got Nick evicted also turns Eric with his two dissenting votes into a grand puppetmaster running the entire house.

I'm disappointed, however, that there seemed to be little discussion of the last part of the banner, where the dominant "Late Night Crew" alliance was likened to the unpopular "Nerd Herd" from Season 6. (Might I add that I hate the idea of making the "Nerd Herd" an insulting nickname? The first time I heard of the Nerd Herd, I imagined a Big Brother cast that bonded over an ability to pepper their conversations with references to "The Monsters are Due on Maple Street" or other smart bits of pop cultural literacy.) A chunk of live feed watchers have a lot of hate for the whole lot of 'em for their tendency to get together and badmouth whoever isn't a part of their clique and it would have been nice if the banner inspired them to reconsider their behavior, even just a little.

Overall, these people are really driving me crazy with their paranoia, self-involvement, cluelessness and lack of introspection. I think that's why I continue to adore Jen. The writers have been letting her show a dry wit and a refusal to whine about the game's cruel twists. When the birds in the HoH competition let loose a stream of ... uhm, bird poop all over the houseguests (this show really knows its way around a visual metaphor), Jen sing-songs "Oh, how fun!" I don't believe she was the slightest bit sincere in that sentiment, but I prefer that insincere "You can't get me down, I like it!" sentiment to the whining more common among reality TV contestants.

When Dick tries to taunt Jen and Kail off of their perches, Jen makes a wonderfully subtle dig, "I almost want to get off (and give up the competition) just to see Danielle's letter from her boyfriend and all her pictures." Dick may be able to berate with a slew of profanities and threats of violence, but Jen found words that can really cut -- especially if Danielle were smart enough to realize how the classiness-challenged Big Brother producers would portray her little showmance. After Danielle wins the HoH, Jen reacts, "I'm not nervous that I could be nominated, it's actually better to be nominated. The replacement nominee seems to be the one to go home every week." She may have initially come off as a narcissist, but considering how everyone else in the house has turned out to be too self involved to realize how they can't stick with a strategy for a whole week, Jen's showing more awareness of artificial world around her than anyone else.

I am so tired of both Dick and Danielle. I am now FF'ing through most times when Dick speaks. I can't take the way he shouts people down, his cheap insults and his self-aggrandizing. He's the guy who never stops being right, especially when he is obviously contradicting himself. Danielle show's a similar temper and tendency towards narcissism. I am really tired of these two -- can they go so that we can get back to Dustin, who was almost invisible this episode? (On the other hand, I guess at this stage in a Big Brother season, "No gnus is good gnus.")