"Big Love"'s "Strange Bedfellows" Includes Compelling Gay Storyline

Ben Koldyke as Dale Tomasson and Matt Ross as Alby Grant

***WARNING*** This post discusses the "Strange Bedfellows" episode of Big Love that aired Sunday night. 

Last night's episode of HBO's Big Love took the burgeoning (and seriously dysfunctional) relationship between Alby Grant (Matt Ross) and Dale Tomasson (Ben Koldyke) to a very interesting place. In fact, I'd say the character of Alby is now officially in the company of some other very closeted and very interesting characters, including Gay Vito on The Sopranos and Sal on Mad Men, that we don't often see on television.

After having previously cruised each other in a park, Alby and Dale again encounter each other in the presence of Alby's lawyer during a meeting about Church business, but after Alby orders his lawyer to leave, the two men pick up where they left off. 

Later, Dale drops by Alby's office to confront him about the fact that they again had sex, only to have Alby run off. At first, Alby refuses to look Dale in the eye while Dale explains he doesn't know what made him go cruising in the park, but that he can't do it again as it is both immoral for religious reason and unethical given Dale's role in Church affairs. The two then have this exchange:

DALE: Being gay is not the sin, you know.
ALBY: I am not a gay.
DALE: Our heavenly father forgives us that. It's acting on those impulses that's wrong.
ALBY: Homosexuality is a sin. We were just fooling around. I like fooling around.
DALE: No! I'm trying to be right with my father in heaven. I have a wife. I have three boys. I struggle with these unbearable urges.
ALBY: I have urges too. [long pause as they stare at each other] I can still taste you on my lips.

The two are about to kiss again when Alby's son enters his office and the men quickly move apart. 

The next time we see them, they are in bed after having had sex. Dale is asleep while a smiling, uncharacteristically happy Alby uses his cell phone to take a picture of them together. There doesn't seem to be any malice in what he does, but rather a desire to capture what is probably the first time Alby has ever been at peace with himself, even if it's only for a moment. (That being said, I wouldn't be the least bit surprised if the picture does turn up at some point unpleasant for Dale.)

After Dale wakes up they discuss secretly working together and then Alby talks about what it's like being gay and the son of Roman Grant. 

ALBY: I feel like I'm trapped behind a wall.  And I want to break it to get to the other side ... where all the people are.
DALE: This burden, it's only for a lifetime.
ALBY: Is that true?
DALE: Yes. Same gender attraction doesn't exist in our pre-earth life. And it doesn't exist in our celestial kingdom. You're not stuck with this forever. Only for now.
ALBY: [nearly overcome with emotion]: I didn't know that.

Alas, after Dale goes into the bathroom, Alby's dead father appears and tells Alby that Dale is wrong and that Alby should kill himself.

All in all, I found the Alby/Dale scenes to be rather remarkable and touching. It's not often that television takes religion or religious beliefs seriously, especially when those beliefs fly in the face of what most of us believe. And that is doubly true when it comes to a hot button topic such as homosexuality.

Yet what made these particular scenes especially moving was that the writers treat these two men and their beliefs with respect, and in doing so it highlights the awfulness of how trapped they are and the pain that denying their true natures causes them.

While more gay and bisexual men are living happy, fulfilled lives than ever before, the fact of the matter is an unknown number are still living lives of desperation just like Alby and Dale. It's going to be fascinating to see where the show takes their storyline, but I suspect it won't be too a happy place.