"RuPaul's Drag Race": Handicapping the Finalists

Over the past 6 weeks, RuPaul’s Drag Race has taught us a lot of things. Yes, Virginia, LOGO can produce an insanely entertaining show (and I'm not just saying that because they own the site!), RuPaul is still as fierce and relevant as ever, and regional queens take note, because there is plenty of drag talent outside of New York and Los Angeles. However, we’re down to the final 3 and now I’m about to handicap them based on (what else?) their Charisma, Uniqueness, Nerve, and Talent!

Check out how the final three rate on the C.*.N.T. scale!

REBECCA GLASSCOCK - ODDS OF WINNING - 5 TO 1

Charisma: 5/10 - I’m sorry, is anybody home? Rebecca is B-O-R-I-N-G. She’s just kind of there, which is probably why her very presence has inspired so much hate in the rest of the cast. In order to be a true reality show bitch/villainess, one has to inspire emotion in others through an outsized personality or outrageous behavior. Rebecca has neither, which I suspect is what gets under her competitors’ skin the most.

Uniqueness: 3/10 - Her bland blond wigs and mediocre makeup do little to make her stand out in a crowd. I cannot imagine her commanding the stage in a room of 30, much less 300 or even 3,000. She’s a big “meh” on every level, but especially this one.

Nerve: 10/10 - Glasscock is cocky as hell while competing for something that is clearly out of her league and being outclassed at virtually every second while doing it. If that’s not nerve, sister, then I don’t know what is.

Talent: 4/10 - While some may call her designs simple, I call them amateurish, and her makeup always seems a few shades too light for her already fair skin. Her hemlines are sloppy, her dance moves are dated, her lip-syncing lacks soul and connection to the material, and she always seems a bit dead in the eyes while doing it. Homegirl would get eaten alive at Wichita Pride, let alone sharing the stage with the likes of RuPaul in a major city. NEXT!

Final Verdict: A cute boy in a dress at the beginning of his journey in a career in drag? Maybe, but the next drag superstar Glasscock is surely not. I’ll be shocked if this one makes it to the final two.

NINA FLOWERS - ODDS OF WINNING - 3 TO 2                            

Charisma: 7/10 - Nina’s look is so fresh and different that it immediately demands attention, but you get the sense that she may be too complacent with having the makeup do the talking for her. Her grasp of the language is, um, tenuous at best, so it may be extra hard for her to keep up with the witty repartee that most queens are known for.

Uniqueness: 10/10 - Has anybody ever seen a queen like this? Again, here the makeup is a big part of Flowers’ appeal, but in this case it helps her stand heels above everyone else. Don’t pretend you’ve seen a queen like her before, because you haven’t. So there.

Nerve: 4/10 - Flowers is always fierce, but she hasn’t given us a "gotcha" moment to throw us all back. However, she does get bonus points for whatever it was she had wrapped around her head for that first runway walk.

Talent: 6/10 - Girlfriend has an eye for fashion and she did show a humorous side during the Oprah-inspired challenge. Still, she’s more of an image than a fully-formed entertainer, and that’s gonna cost her.

Final Verdict: Ms. Flowers certainly dazzled right out of the gate, but she may have peaked too early. Beyond the intricate outfits and that fe-rosh makeup, she still hasn’t given us a sense of who she really is.         

BEBE ZAHARA BENET - ODDS OF WINNING - 2 TO 1

Charisma: 9/10 - Ms. Zahara Benet (hey, did you hear she’s from Africa?) gives a near-perfect combination of face, fierce, and looks. She simultaneously channels divas from different eras (I detected hints of Janet, Tina, and Diana during a recent runway walk), and her regal demeanor demands attention. That being said, she would do well to develop a drag personality that extends a little further beyond her African roots and lighten up just a bit.

Uniqueness: 9/10 - Yes, she does use the African thing a lot, but when she does, she turns it out. She’s not ashamed to use influences from her home country in her costumes and movements, and she has a look that is not easily duplicated. One of a kind, she definitely is.

Nerve: 10/10 - Two Words: Leopard Catsuit. Rrrrrrrrrraaaaaaaarrrwwwwwrrrrrr.

Talent: 9/10 - Her designs are fresh and classic, her makeup flawless, and her presence is undeniable. The one time she was forced to lip-sync for her life, she really meant it. Throughout the weeks, she has left me dying to see what she would come up with next.

Final Verdict: Bow down to the next drag superstar, bitches.

So, do you disagree?  If you think that Nina can pull it out, that Bebe sucks, or if you've been drinking heavily and think that Rebecca is gonna triumph, by all means ... DISCUSS!