Your Monday Morning "Everything Bagel!"

Enjoy this tasty treat designed help to stall the inevitable soul crushingness that is known as the start of the work week. Savor it because as soon as you're done, it begins...

I really don't need to see this first thing Monday morning.

• The Wanda Sykes Show premiered Saturday night to decent ratings and so-so reviews.

• Showtime has finally issued start dates for the return of some of its gay faves. United States of Tara returns on January 25, Nurse Jackie on March 22, and The Tudors on April 11.

All Aboard! (Pic - Todd Kancar)

• Above you can see Levi Johnston arriving in NYC for his Playgirl shoot (John Polly has more photos and details). Look, I know we shouldn't be devoting any space to this, but c'mon, it's hilarious!

• Did Miley Cyrus really change the lyrics to one of her songs from "you're vain, your games" to "your vain, you're gay"? Judge for yourself.

• The Sunday New York Times had an interesting article looking at how kids express gender identity in schools these days and how complicated the issue can be. Meanwhile, the NY Times Sunday Magazine wrote about how kids of gay parents are turning out. The answer? Pretty damn great.

• A Boston retail store manager has learned what a zero-tolerance policy means after he was fired for putting in his two cents about a a colleague's marriage.

• Above you can see the Motorola commercial that aired during the World Series that features a cameo from a dinosaur hating Neil Patrick Harris (and features a perfect Wilhelm Scream).

• A gay couple has been BANNED FOR LIFE from a Michigan Wal-Mart because of a kerfuffel over some lighters Wait a minute ... banned for life from Wal-Mart? Is that a punishment?

Sam Sparro

• Celebrating birthdays over the weekend are out actor Craig Chester, who turns 44, out singer/songwriter Sam Sparro, who turns 27, and Brothers & Sisters star Matthew Rhys, who turns 35.

• Thetorchonline has that video of Sir Ian McKellen somehow enduring an appearance on The View.

• And here is your sports pics of the week!

Apparently they won some baseball game.

And now the work week begins! We're so so sorry...