Can we help Neil Patrick Harris escape from another "Harold & Kumar" sequel?

We love Neil Patrick Harris. Really, we do. He's out, talented, funny, charming, and has managed the transition from child star to adult actor splendidly.

However, his decision to remain open to a possible third Harold & Kumar film has us a little worried. When Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle was released in 2004, it became a cult hit, thanks in no small part to Neil's role as "Neil Patrick Harris", a former child star addicted to hallucinogens and women.

After the surprise success of the first film a sequel was inevitable, and Neil reprised his role as Bizarro World Neil in last year's Harold & Kumar Escape From Guantanomo Bay. Unfortunately, the good nature of the first stoner film was replaced with nasty gay panic and gay baiting, and we were perplexed and disappointed that Neil would be lumped into something so blatantly homophobic.

If Neil is adamant about doing a sequel to one of his past works, we can think of a few of his movies that are far more deserving of another helping. We'd much prefer to see him revisit these roles than take another ride with Harold & Kumar.

Above you can see the trailer for Neil's first role, in the 1988 Whoopi Goldberg tearjerker Clara's Heart, in which he played a spoiled brat (named Harris?!) who "learns a life lesson" from wise housekeeper Clara. In the sequel Clara's Heart 2: Clara's Revenge, Clara has moved up in the world and is now the moderator of a daytime chat show. Slowly driven insane by the idiotic ramblings of the airheads she works with, she begins hallucinating, seeing the floating head of a blackfaced Ted Danson everywhere. It's up to Harris to save the day, and his former nanny.

I predict this Michael Bay production will gross eighty million its opening weekend.

Above is the trailer for Neil's second film, 1988's Purple People Eater. Playing alongside Neil was Ned Beatty, Shelley Winters, and Dustin Diamond as Big Z. Yes, that's right, Neil starred in a film with Screetch from Saved by the Bell.

In the sequel, tentatively titled Purple People Eater 2, the purple space creature returns, aided by the rubber aliens from Mac and Me and that flying dogrug from Neverending Story. They've come back to earth with a few days ... to kill! It's up to Neil, Ned, and amateur porn star Big Z. to save the world, aided by telepathic messages from Shelley from beyond the grave.

I predict this Uwe Boll epic will sweep the Oscars and set the new standard for fantasy films.

Of course, these are just suggestions for Neil, and he should consider it free career advice. Any of his films you'd like to see him resurrect?