Liveblogging "One Life To Live": Oliver Fish, tech geek!

The search is on for Starr and Hope, thanks to the wizardry of Police Cop Oliver. You know, if Oliver were to pair up with California Highway Patrol ... they could call it ... Fish & CHiPs.

I'm sorry.

Please ignore that and try to enjoy today's Liveblog, and refresh for updates!

2:05PM EST: That Bitch Tea Delgado saunters down the stairs to Todd, whose face still looks like steak tartare

Whoa! Shaun is still alive! He left about 10 gallons of gazpacho on the mansion floor!

Staci is panicking because Rex is taking her to the doctor for her appointment. Kim reminds her about her and Fish's one night stand, and that she should take a pregnancy test to see if his swimmer's reached their goal.

2:10PM EST: Uh-Oh, Gigi is starting to suspect that Staci might be faking her pregnancy. If my soap opera history tells me anything, that means for certain that Staci is going to be pregnant again.

2:20PM EST: I hope they're not planning to rescue Starr and Hope without Oliver, because right now it's just John, Bo, and Brody . If Oliver isn't going to a part of this, then I demand that Brody conduct the investigation shirtless.

FISH! He and Cole are grappling. Unfortunately, it's not shirtless in a mud pit. Cole is going ballistic, and Fish is trying to hold him back.

2:30PM EST: Fish is right there when they interrogate blonde pusher Asher, and stands right behind him in a ... provocative (and hilarious) position.

John has Brody come into the room to "intimidate" Asher, in a scene that I tried mightily not to find hot.

Blair has returned, and after Todd explains what happened, the two of them leave for the poilce station. Meanwhile T.B.T.D. hears something in the other room. Don't worry, it just Cabana Boy Ross stealing some grapes.

2:40PM EST: Okay, Kim's new plan is to have Stacy go to the doctor and act shocked when he tells her she's no longer pregnant. That way Rex will feel sorry for her. My soap opera watching credentials still tell me that Staci is going to be pregnant.

Serge calls Bo and taunts him with "tink tonk, tink tonk", which I think is translated as "tick tock". Bo tries to make a deal for the release of Hope, but Serge nixes it.

2:45PM EST: Gigi busts into the room and sees Kim throwing something in the trash. When Kim, Staci, and Rex leave for the doctor, Gigi goes back into the apartment, fishes through the trash, and finds the Dollar Store pregnancy test.

T.B.T.D. heads onto the veranda shouting "who's there?" (has that ever worked?). Cabana Boy watches from the bushes.

Fish, Brody, John, and Bo listen as Serge tires of their feet dragging and demands action. Bo says "we want the baby!". They hears Serge say "hand me the baby" .... then a gunshot.

Well ... I guess the baby is dead.

Preview Time: We'll be back tomorrow for what should be the wrap-up.