IMHO "Brothers & Sisters" Episode 314: "Owning It"

This week’s B&S marked the much anticipated arrival of Uncle Saul’s BF, “Henry,” played by character actor warhorse John Glover. You might know him from Love Valour Compassion. Or Smallville. Or perhaps his current stint on Heroes. But to me he’ll always be Daniel Clamp from the greatest sequel ever made, Gremlins 2.

Anyway, “Henry” isn’t the only oft-mentioned but oft-invisible gay to actually show up this week. Scotty’s back as well! And given the presence of so many gays in one episode, I spent the first half hour with my arrow firmly in the upward position. But as things progressed, it began to sag, eventually settling into the limp sideways position I’m sticking this mixed-bag episode with.

Photos courtesy ABC

At the start of the episode, Nora is feverishly planning Kitty’s baby shower, with help from Sarah and Paige. Paige asks why Scotty, Kevin and Saul are invited when Uncle Tommy isn’t, then gets this wicked grin on her face when she figures out it’s because her family has as many ’mos in it as alcoholics. You can see how excited she is about this, like she’s thinking, “Just wait until those beyotches at school hear I’ve got gay uncles … how cool is that?”

Nora says she’s read lately that it’s okay to invite your gay friends and relatives to events like this. Seriously? I’d love to know exactly what Nora’s been reading … some sort of how-to manual published by PFLAG? “DO: invite gays to showers, book clubs, and quilting circles, where their sassy sense of humor and willingness to offer impromptu makeovers will be most welcome. DON’T: talk about carbs, sports, or Mariah Carey. They hate that!”

Next we join the three gaysketeers — Uncle Saul, Scotty, and Kevin — eating lunch together at Scotty’s restaurant. It’s sweet to see the three of them hanging out, all, “You’re gay, we’re gay, let’s be friends, ’kay?” But Saul is being all fussbudgety about how he resents getting an e-vite for the shower instead of a “proper” embossed invitation by mail. While you’re at it Saul, you might want to make sure your horse and buggy are available to take you shopping for a new victrola.

Saul is also insulted that the gays are invited to the shower but not the hets. Kevin sarcastically responds, “We’re gay, we’re supposed to like this sort of thing.” First of all, I agree that it’s offensive to assume all gay men would automatically feel comfortable about being invited to traditionally female social events like baby showers. Second of all, can somebody tell me what I need to do to get invited to one myself? Because I would totally love it. As far as I can tell, it would be an excellent opportunity to get loaded on champagne during the daytime and complain about my husband in public.

Saul argues, “I didn’t come out of the closet to be a cliché.” Well you should have thought of that before you decided to be a character on a primetime network TV show. You want to be one of those complicated, edgy gays, you better get your ass over to cable.

Saul elaborates that he’s not planning on going to any pride parades wearing chaps anytime soon either. That’s okay, Saul … rainbow loincloths, leather jock straps, and drag are also acceptable pride attire. Kevin gets pissy about Saul’s fussiness and calls him on it …

Kevin: What’s the point of being gay if you’re going to act like this.
Scotty: Maybe it’s a generational thing. There’s more than one way to be gay.
Kevin: Well, he’s managed to pick the most dull and joyless version I’ve ever seen.

Bwa ha ha ha ha! That’s rich coming from Kevin. The gayest thing he’s ever done is see Wicked. Unless he somehow thinks his dating history makes him interesting, which I guess it does, given he’s gone out with a priest, an actor, a G.I. and a chef, like he’s working his way through some gay version of Clue.

Kevin figures out the real reason Saul doesn’t want to go to the shower is because he’s still reluctant about introducing his BF to the family. Saul is all, “Can you blame me?” and gets up to leave, saying, “I will not stay here to be interrogated by The View.” Heh. He would never have had a line like that before he was gay.

Nevertheless, Saul winds up bringing Henry to the shower, and when he shows up, he’s surprisingly adorable and scruffy looking, kind of like an Irish Setter.

The Shower, as with all Walker events, is a festering cesspool of bitterness and resentment waiting to inevitably spew forth. And spew it does …

For one thing, Kitty is upset because she got a job offer from her alma mater (some bogus school that starts with a “W”) to start their broadcast journalism department. The only problem is they want her to start right away, and she neglected to mention the tiny, insignificant fact she’s about to become a mom. Now she’s pissed that Sarah had the gall to tell her that just because you tell yourself you can have it all doesn’t necessarily mean you can have it all.

Meanwhile, Nora is all upset about her relationship with Roger Grant, who we learn has become the Architect of Her Heart’s Desire. In other words, they’re totally doing it, as Nora shares with Sarah at the start of the episode. This is probably the dumbest, most implausible thing we’ve ever seen on this show — not that Nora would be sleeping with Roger, but that she and Sarah would ever discuss this. And particularly that Sarah would actually ask her mother how the sex is. No child wants to know their parent is even having sex, much less all the gory, messy details about it.

But then Nora goes snooping through Roger’s briefcase (why is it people are always leaving incriminating personal property in Nora’s kitchen? It’s like a black hole of storyline cliches) and discovers he’s married. This makes her the other woman, a.k.a. the “Holly Harper” in this scenario, a realization that horrifies her. As well it should, since it means she’ll now be required to wear dangly earrings and leopard-print business suits.

But, good news! Roger has a totally reasonable explanation for all this. He and the wife have an “open relationship.” And wifey knows all about Nora and couldn’t be happier for them! (Cough cough … bullsh*t … cough cough.)

So all during the shower, it’s clear Nora is flummoxed by this latest revelation and having difficulty processing it. This takes the form of her transforming into a Monica Geller-like Hostess Nazi, forcing everybody to play dopey party games when they’d all rather be dishing with Henry and finding out which sleazy leather bar he picked up Saul in. I kept waiting for the police to show up on a noise complaint and unvelcro their uniforms and start gyrating around the cake, but I guess it’s not that kind of a shower.

After Kitty and Nora have a big blow out during which Nora accuses Kitty of not really wanting to parent a child, and Kitty calls Nora “traditional,” Henry at last gets to speak. He tells Nora he heard of a study where monogamous couples and those in an open relationship all reported being equally happy. His point, he says as he puts his arm proudly on Saul, is that one can be happy in any kind of a relationship.

This was the part of the episode that, on reflection, really bugged me. I appreciate how this show is trying to redefine marriage and family. But I didn’t like the implication that by being gay one is by necessity then required to be accepting of any and all types of relationships. It’s the same kind of fuzzy logic that homophobes use to argue against gay marriage, claiming it’s a slippery slope and all of a sudden it will be acceptable for cats to marry dogs.

Plus, not all open relationships are the same; some can be horribly destructive, and the ones that seem to work are those in which partners clearly lay out rules and guidelines they’re comfortable with. I find it hard to believe anyone would be as happy as Roger claims his wife is to find out their partner is not just having sex outside the marriage but actively romancing and courting this other party. But this episode can’t be bothered to get into those nuances, because as with most B&S love interests, Roger’s sexytime is about to expire.

Anyway, Nora briefly considers going all Swingtown with Roger. But then she runs into Holly and for some bizarre, masochist reason only she can understand, she decides to tell Holly about how she’s now the other woman. Holly LOVES hearing this, as you might imagine. But talking with Holly makes Nora realize she’s not the kind of woman to be comfortable in an open relationship. She tells Roger she doesn’t judge him for his own choices, but for once in her life, she doesn’t want to be sharing her man with anyone else.

Meanwhile, all the baby stuff Kitty gets at her shower makes her realize that taking care of a baby might be a bit more involved than simply dropping the tot off at the IKEA ball-pit on the way to office hours at Wesley Snipes University. When she tells Robert she’s turning down the academic job, he’s bummed because he thought his being supportive of her career would soften the blow when he tells her about his campaign for governor. When he finally does tell her, she is not happy.

The other big plot development this episode is that Rebecca gets all Nancy Drew-like and figures out that Ojai’s acquisition of another vineyard is some evil plot of Tommy’s. When she confides in Justin about this, he dismisses of her concerns and defends his brother, and she justifiably says he should back her up once in a while over his family. I love it because it indicates we’re finally getting cracks in this preposterous, mind-numbingly boring relationship. Maybe Justin will finally be free to act on those funny feelings he used to get in the barracks shower room.

And finally, a surprise ending (sort of). Throughout the episode, Nora’s been getting hang-ups that she assumes are Roger’s wife. But in the last scene we find out it’s actually Ryan Lafferty! And he’s got sad emo hair.

A decent episode with some interesting plot developments. But in the end, I was really disappointed that they went to all the trouble of introducing John Glover’s character only to relegate him and all the other gays to the sofa as spectators — and fonts of fairy godfather wisdom — to Kitty and Nora’s own self-involved melodramas. Hence the droopy arrow.

ONE FINAL ANNOUNCEMENT: There will no longer be full scene-by-scene episode recaps of Brothers & Sisters on the main page every week — unless it’s an episode where Kevin and Scotty are central (a.k.a. when Jason Lewis shows up and takes his shirt off), in which case I’ll definitely being doing my usual in depth recap. Otherwise, look for these shorter posts on Sunday nights to give you MHO and a chance to vent yours.