AT LEAST YOU WEREN'T WAITING IN THE WINGS
If you think you felt bad, imagine how everyone involved with making Brokeback felt when they heard Crash's name called out. Apparently, the shock wasn't all that great as rumors circulated during pre-Oscar activities that Crash would win. Those in the theater say that Heath, Jake, and everyone else involved slumped in abject disappointment when Jack announced the winner. (Jake confirmed this for me when he got home. Poor baby couldn't sleep a wink.) As for Ang, after collecting his Best Director statue he was instructed to wait in the wings so he could trot right back out on stage if needed. Imagine how embarrassed Ang felt standing there when Crash won instead.

Ang was so disappointed that he cancelled a scheduled appearance on The Tonight Show. But it wasn't for himself that Ang was most crushed; rather he felt terrible for everyone else involved, especially the actors. He told reporters afterward that Heath's performance is one of the all time greats. Word has it that he intended to praise all of the actors when the movie got Best Picture. That makes me feel especially grateful that Ang used his Best Director speech to acknowledge the love of gay men.

NO, I DON'T HAVE EBERT'S HOME ADDRESS. AND I WOULDN'T GIVE IT TO YOU
IF I DID
After the crushing disappointment of Brokeback's loss, gay men dressed in chaps and wearing cowboy hats across the country wanted someone to lash out. And film-critic Roger Ebert provided the perfect target. After all, he'd been championing Crash all along and wrote a column the day afterward called Crash-lash in which he used the word “virulence” to describe the anger of Brokeback supporters toward Crash fans.

Um, he's got a point, folks. While Mr. Ebert and I may disagree on which movie deserved the Oscar he is, ironically, one of those least deserving of the criticism subsequently heaped on him. Unlike all the Johnny-come-lately's, who discovered Crash six weeks ago when they realized the “gay cowboy” movie would win, Mr. Ebert not only saw Brokeback Mountain, but gave it an absolutely wonderful, glowing review. Hell, he even uses the words “making love” to describe when Jack and Ennis have sex. How many other straight, male movie critics can you say that about?

Furthermore, Mr. Ebert championed Crash as his Best Picture choice months ago, helping it to win Best Picture by the Chicago Film Critics. He is not the problem here. So call off the fatwah on him, okay? Go after Tony Curtis instead, who couldn't even be bothered to see the movie.

PUTTING THEIR MONEY WHERE THEIR MOUTH IS
If you think the folks at your Oscar party were mad when Brokeback lost, be glad you weren't online at Dave Cullen's Ultimate Brokeback. Maybe no one can hear you scream in space, but trust me, they sure as heck can in cyberspace. Those folks were pissed! Taking a cue from Ennis himself, they're trying to fix what they can't stand. Or at least speak up about it at any rate.

Dave and his Brokeaholics have decided to place an ad in Variety. Debate is still ongoing as to the tone the ad will take, but it seems likely it will congratulate Brokeback for having won almost everything else except the Oscar, thereby highlighting the folly of those who chose Crash. Donations are being gladly accepted. Why not chip in? I did.

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