Morning Meme: David Burtka Finds Time for E! News, Johnny Depp Angers Christian Coalition, and Chris Colfer's Magic Butt

Once Upon a Time has found Gaston. Sage Brocklebank is stepping away from Psych to play Gaston, which begs the question as to which of his characters will have the coolest name: Gaston, or Officer Buzz McNabb?

Seriously, if this is the whole story, I'm never using PayPal again.

Johnny Depp has ticked off both Focus on the Family and the Christian Coalition by providing vocals to the Babybird track "Jesus Stag Night." So he's my Hero of the Day.

Evidently there is a Tumblr devoted to pictures of cats with large amounts of cash.

I just love the expression of horror on Rep. Michele Bachmann's face when she realizes what 8-year-old Elijah told her.

I don't think that Americans, myself included, have a proper understanding of panto. I certainly don't understand why actor Stevie Webb seemed delighted that Financial Times called his performance in Aladdin "as camp as a field full of pink bell tents."

I gave up on watching Nikita after about five episodes, but news that Sean Pierce just shot an entire episode in his underwear does intrigue me. Evidently the women in the cast had bets going about his body since they'd only seen him in suits. I'm more interested in exactly what kind of underwear we're talking about.

Ginger fans rejoice, because someone is selling naked pictures of Shaun White, and yes, this evidently is a red carpet event.

ABC News caught up with the mother of Jonah Mowry, who found a lot of love when he actually got to high school compared to what he'd been living in middle school. And Perez Hilton (let it go and read it) has a note from Jonah about those who feel that incredible video is fake. Seriously, if that was fake, Meryl Streep can retire.

Beginning in January, David Burtka becomes a correspondent for E! News, as well as taking on red carpet duties. Can you imagine, Neil Patrick Harris hosting an awards show, and David doing the red carpet preshow? I just don't know where David finds the time – dad, catering company, movie with Cybill Shepherd, the charity events. I'm exhausted just reporting on it.

But Benecio del Toro is not going to play the villain in the new Star Trek movie as talks fell apart about money.  But Peter Weller is appearing in the movie.

The world's most expensive car crash took out eight Ferraris and a Lamborghini, along with a Prius and another Toyota in Japan. Price tag? Around $3.8 million.

While no charges were filed, several students involved in the bullying of Jamey Rodenmeyer have been suspended from school based on evidence collected by the police investigation.

As hits the news every year, a woman has been fined by her homeowner's association for the crime of displaying colored lights. I'm so glad I don't have a homeowner's association, because I'm working on a full Griswold, which will get me close to my neighbors. Some have been preparing for months.

Today in good gay penguin news!

Misha Collins is coming back to Supernatural! No word yet on how they'll make that happen, but I don't care as long as my deadpan angel returns.

Why doesn't this escaped turtle have a Twitter account yet?

Atheists, particularly those with advanced degrees in science, frequently expose their children to religion. Sometimes it's for a sense of community, but frequently it's to allow the children to make their own decisions. This arrangement doesn't seem to apply to people of faith.

SyFy has rounded up an all-star cast for Jersey Shore Shark Attack including Tony Sirico (The Sopranos), Paul Sorvino (Goodfellas), Jack Scalia (Dallas), Joey Fatone (‘N Sync), William Atherton (Die Hard), and the namesake, Vinny Guadagino.

It turns out that even some gay men still treat HIV+ men like crap. "HIV stigma should have decreased with the introduction of effective therapies. However, our review has found stigmatising and discriminatory views continue to be held, among gay men themselves, and their effects are detrimental to the quality of life and emotional well-being of HIV-positive gay men."

I'm so glad I don't go clubbing any more.

I understand why people like Elizabeth Taylor were the top Twitter topics in 2011. But remind me again why Macaulay Culkin was #2 on the actors list? Don't get me wrong, I love that he appeared and someone so overexposed like Justin Beiber (get off my lawn!) didn't, but I don't understand it.