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AE: Speaking of the D-List, what can you tell us about your reality show's third season? What does it have in store?
KG: They're apparently trying to kill me this year! Because this year I'm performing in a prison. As if Iraq didn't kill me. Oh, but here's the kicker: Did you know prisons often have gay wings?

AE: Oh, yeah.
KG: I'm going to perform in a women's prison in Mississippi. I'm going to perform in a maximum security men's prison. And then the gay wing of a prison. I'm like, let me at them! I talked to a couple guys that I know who were, shall I say, guests at that facility. They were like, "You have to do the gay wing of a prison! Because they'll all know you."

I thought if I do a prison with straight guys with tattoos on their necks, they're not going to know me. The women might or might not know me. But let me at that gay wing. That's something I'm really nervous about doing this season, but I'm looking forward to it.

AE: Another interesting job you've announced you're doing is you're hosting the Gay Adult Video News awards.
KG: Oh, yes! I can't wait!

AE: What on earth prompted you to do that gig?
KG: They called and paid my quote! Now here's the thing, though: I have to do my research, because the only name I know is Jeff Stryker. Can you tell me who are the stars?

AE: Believe it or not, I don't actually watch porn.
KG: Mike!

AE: Seriously.
KG: I'm calling the President of the Gays and getting your card revoked. We have to talk.

AE: The only thing I know is that a good person to talk to would be Margaret Cho.
KG: Oh, she'll know 'em all! Intimately. Do you know what the categories are going to be? Most aggressive bottom? I can't wait to see the categories!

AE: You've been very supportive of the American military. As an Army brat myself, I wanted to thank you for doing the USO shows. What do you think of the Don't Ask, Don't Tell rule?
KG: I don't even know where to start. When I went to Afghanistan in 2002, Clinton had only been out of office for a little while. I think the anti-gay sentiments in the military have only gotten worse under this administration. I personally noticed a difference in 2002 and 2006 when I went to Iraq. I think it's a brutal thing.

I think that Don't Ask, Don't Tell is an understatement. I think it's more like, "We find out you're gay, we kick your ass." And who the f--- do they think they are that they can be so picky? With the firing of the translators who speak Arabic when like 12 people in the military speak Arabic. I think things are going to change. I really do. I think whoever the next president is can't be as conservative. It's not even possible. The tide is going to turn. I certainly know gay people in the military. And you probably do, too.

AE: Yes.
KG: It's a tough thing, man. It's a very tough thing. The gays I know in the military truly love the military. And yet they feel kind of bitter they're forced to live a double life. Like these guys don't have enough f---ing stuff to worry about there in a war zone? I really admire the gays over there. I admire the women. I admire everybody! That's just got to be doubly tough! They're strong motherf---ers, those guys. They're badasses. I wouldn't want to mess with them.

AE: Ellen DeGeneres called you "very mean" in W Magazine.
KG: I know.

AE: And you've been reportedly banned from her show. How do you take that?
KG: Well, it hurts, because I really like her. I'm an admirer of hers. … Her stand-up is very different from mine; she's very clean, very polished, all that stuff. You know, that's the whole deal … when I shoot my mouth off, that's what happens. Some people like me for it; some people don't like me for it. Some people get it; some people think I'm mean. I don't think I'm mean. I think I just make fun of people's behavior. That is absolutely her prerogative.

But believe me, I'm going to be watching her on the Oscars and be excited for her as a woman and as a comedian — to be hosting the Oscars is so great! I'm a big supporter of hers. It's the same with Perez Hilton. Everyone has the right to think I'm funny or not to think I'm funny, or think I'm mean or think whatever they think. And the funny thing is, you'd be surprised about how many people that don't like me, I still like them. I mean, I can really make a separation. I think the Ellen show is great! It's not always my cup of tea; it's a little squeaky clean for me. I'm just happy that she exists. To have a gay woman with such acceptance is huge!

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