Interview With Nate Berkus of "Oprah's Big Give"

AE: Right, I just think it’s going to be great for Middle America to see someone who’s so completely confident and comfortable in his sexuality doing something different than styling hair. They’re sort of used to seeing us in certain types of shows and it’s nice to see you hosting a show like this.
NB: To be very frank, you know what was surprising for me when I came out on The Oprah Winfrey Show when we did the show about the tsunami: the feedback that I got from Middle America. I sort of wondered whether or not [they would react positively]. Of course, I didn’t care because I went on the show to tell my story and present my relationship with Fernando [Fernando Bengochea was Berkus' partner who died in the 2004 Indian Ocean tsunami which Nate survived] as exactly what it was. But it was shocking the amount of support that I got from the people that you would least expect it from, from the demographic that you would least expect it from. That was very encouraging for me.

AE: So you think perhaps we underestimate those folks?
NB: I do. I think we’re underestimating them. Obviously bigotry, hatred and all those things exist in our society, in every society, but I do think that we tend to underestimate what we think “Middle America” is feeling. I’m not conscious of the fact that when I step out in front of a camera that I’m a gay man. I’m conscious of the fact that I’m a man and I have a job to do and I have obligations and responsibilities and I want to be as straightforward as possible.

AE: And you do your job well. It’s great to watch.
NB: Oh, thank you.

AE: Did you have any gay role models when you were growing up and dealing with your sexuality, that you sort of looked at and thought “Okay, I can be the sort of gay man that I want to be?”
NB: No. I didn't.

AE: Your parents were very supportive of your being creative as a boy. How were they when you came out?
NB: My parents are both supportive. Initially they went through a process that I can only describe as mourning. Because I feel like any parent who has any goals for their children or any sort of preconceived notion about how their children’s’ lives are going to turn out, when you tell them something that will alter that, your parents have to deal with the disappointment in that their own dreams and expectations aren’t the same as yours.

So I was respectful of that, but I was also very strong in saying this is who I am, this is what my life is and I really need you guys to be on board with this because I don’t want to be one of those people that feels I can’t bring my partner home for holidays and we won’t know each other really. It is the difference to me between having an obligatory relationship and a voluntary relationship.

AE: That’s almost exactly what I said to my parents. How old were you when you came out to them?
NB: 19.

AE: Is there any more television in your future?
NB: Your guess is as good as mine. I’m really thankful for the opportunities that I’ve been given. I’m really excited about being a part of this show for several reasons. If another project comes along and I can be as connected to it as I am to The Big Give, then why not?

Berkus and the cast of Oprah's Big Give