For those who had hoped to see Terri, Mario Cantone’s gay hairdresser on Men in Trees lose his heart to another man, I’ve got good news and bad news. Well, mostly bad news. On the April 2^nd episode “Get a Life”, Terri does lose a major body organ to another man. Unfortunately, it’s his kidney and it’s to a straight man he hardly knows. Still, it is a storyline for a “barely there” gay character that, of late, has teetered on the brink of not being there at all. Such is the lot of secondary gay characters, something Cantone knows more than a little bit about.

He’s played a gay penguin in Surf’s Up who helps the main character follow his dreams, as well as the “Gay Best Friend” of Charlotte York (Kristin Davis) on Sex and the City where he advises Charlotte on following her dreams. That Cantone keeps getting such “helpful” roles says less about his acting ability than it does the state of Hollywood and they way view gay characters.

Despite any perceived drawbacks to the roles he’s currently landing, Cantone is simply grateful to be a working actor in a business where most actors, much less most openly gay ones, spend the bulk of their time looking for work. And Broadway has been much more receptive to Cantone’s considerable talents where his 2005 one man show Laugh Whore received a Tony Award nomination, not to mention his well-reviewed turns as Buzz Hauser in Love! Valour! Compassion! and as Samuel Byck in Assassins.

AfterElton.com recently caught up with Cantone as he lounged on the beach in Hawaii. The comedian/actor was, as expected, funny and witty, as well as quite frank about his current role on Men in Trees — and why he would rather actually donate a kidney than ever do a reality show.

AfterElton.com: Hi, Mario. Thanks for talking with us today. I don’t know if you know the site —
Mario Cantone: Of course, I do. I read AfterElton; I read your column. I read everything you’ve ever written about me.

AE: Gulp. Hopefully, that’s mostly good.
MC: It is mostly good. I can’t think of anything bad. So it is good.

AE: Good, because I’ve certainly enjoyed you on The View and Sex in the City.
MC: Yeah, I like doing those. It’s fun. I’m trying to build on the acting career more and more. I’ve always wanted to do that. The only way to do it is to keep doing that and stay away from anything that is reality. I won’t touch it. I’ve been offered many reality things [including] hosting my own reality show. You couldn’t pay me enough money. I’ve done five Broadway shows, done some acting on film and television and it’s building more and more. I just think once you do reality, you kill it. Especially when you’re a semi-famous name and you’re gay.

AE: What reality shows have you been offered?
MC: Celebrity Duets I was offered, which was that horrible duet singing show. Little Richard was a judge, and I said no right away.

AE: I have to confess, I had no plans to watch Celebrity Duets, but my partner made me and my inner gay boy came out watching Lucy Lawless. I got hooked because I love her – what can I say?
MC: Was she on that one? I just said no. And they were shocked. Why would you not want to do this? This is great self-promotion! I said it ends your career. That’s why. I just don’t want to do it. I mean money is important, but at the same time it’s not, which is why I’m semi-famous and basically poor.

AE: For viewers who might not have watched Men in Trees before, what can you tell us about Terri and his current story line?
MC: Terri was a hairdresser that lived in New York and – they didn’t dramatize this, they just told me in the first episode – that he was on an Alaskan cruise with his boyfriend, and he walked in on his boyfriend and the ship’s bursar having sex. He flipped out and walked off the boat and ended up in Elmo and stayed there. Believable? I don’t know, but that’s the story.

AE: Just so I’m clear – they told you that was your back-story?
MC: Yeah, that’s my back-story. That’s what I told Anne Heche’s character. And then last year they kind of brought me into the fold more and I had a relationship with Orlando Jones [who played Buzz’s son, George], who played my boyfriend last year on that wretched ice skating episode. It was fun to do. I just thought the episode was going to be better. They all loved it. I didn’t. I didn’t love it.

Cantone, Orlando Jones as George

AE: When you say you thought it was going to be better, do you mean you thought there was going to be more going on with you and Orlando?
MC: Yeah, I think so. Somebody on a blog said, talking about gay characters on TV, they included me and Orlando. The way they said it was ... some of these gay characters on TV, it’s like blink and you miss them gay characters. I feel that way, kind of. Especially with the character of Orlando, it felt very pushed in the back. Not that it should be a main thing, but it felt quick. Which was fine, but you know.

AE: We have a term for that. We call them “barely there” gay characters.
MC: Yeah, I think so. And I’m there, but it’s quick. I just feel like, editing-wise, I can’t describe it. It just seems like it’s in the back. But anyway, look – I’m grateful for the job. I’ve worked with some really wonderful actors. I had a great time doing it and it’s a good role. They gave me some great dramatic stuff which I never get to do, especially in the next two episodes.

When the first season was over, I said to Jenny [Bick’s, MIT’ creator and executive producer] , “Why don’t you have me have a relationship with a straight guy where we kind of bond in some way? I find that very interesting.” It also gets around the fear of the network of having a love interest for me. You know, no matter how much you push that, you’re not going to get it. You’re not going to get to kiss. You’re not going to get to show yourself romantically with them.

Next page! I'd never give my kidney to a straight man just because he's beautiful