Dear Steven Pasquale, You Rock! Thanks, From the Gays

The debate over the use of the word "fag" reared its ugly head yet again on Monday night when Rescue Me star Denis Leary appeared on the Daily Show with Jon Stewart and related a story where co-star Steven Pasquale supposedly used the word fag. Said Leary:

What're you talking about? We're fags! We pretend to be brave guys, what are you talking about?

What's especially ugly about Leary's use of the words is the crystal clear connection he draws between the use of the word "fag" and being cowardly and presumably less of a man. 

Pasquale's wife, Laura Benanti, tweeted on Tuesday that the story wasn't true, saying "Denis Leary told a story on the daily show and said my hubbie used a homophobic slur. FALSE! Steve has never and would never speak that way. In fact steve has refused to use homophobic slurs on rescue me that were written as dialogue!"

Then Pasquale himself weighed in saying:

I am an actor, and I live and work in New York City. I can honestly say that half the people I know, love and respect are gay. I simply didn't say it. I'm not capable of saying it, anymore than describing my black friends as the "N" word. I can't take any responsibility for it. None. I'm afraid Denis got his wires a little crossed in remembering that story.

This isn't the first time Leary has found himself in hot water over his use of anti-gay epithets or the dreadful way he and Peter Tolan handled the bisexual male storyline on Rescue Me, but rather than dredging all that up again, I'd rather focus on Pasquale's statement. 

Here we have two straight actors, each of whom have presumably had a great deal of contact with gay people over the years. And one of them has concluded that using that word "fag" is a grave insult to gay people, something as offensive as any racial slur. Meanwhile the other sees no problem using it in the most public of circumstances.

So, Steven, thanks for not just so eloquently speaking up even though it meant contradicting someone like Leary, but thanks for being the kind of straight guy who who is confident enough and decent enough to not have to insult gay people in the first place. The world could sure use more men like you.