Two studio comedies arrive in theatres today, overpolished and shiny, like wax apples. Both also have throwaway gay characters and are not quite as funny as they would like to be.

Baby Mama
Before I get into this, let me say that I am fully on-board the Fey/Poehler Happytown Express. I have an unlimited ride pass, actually. But even my undying love for these two ladies (and willingness to forgive such atrocities as "Gays in Space" and Envy) wasn't enough to save this one for me. It's cute, sure ... but it's also overlong, achingly predictable, and just not either funny enough or emotionally honest enough to work. While both women have their great moments (improvised, maybe?), the "isn't it funny that these words are coming out of my mouth?" delivery that works for Fey on 30 Rock doesn't translate well to the big screen, and Poehler's character is so wildly uneven (even her accent comes and goes as it pleases) that it feels slapdash.

As far as gay stuff goes, there is a gay couple enrolled in the same surrogate program (run by a wonderfully loathsome Sigourney Weaver) who have a bizarre breakdown related to the fact that one of the men is "manorexic" and thinks that the extremely pregnant woman carrying his child is not merely pregnant, but morbidly obese. Okaaaay... Also, gay go-to character actor Denis O'Hare appears as the ladies' gyno. Overall the movie is cute and you'll chuckle here and there, but it's less than expected from two of the funniest women around, Greg Kinnear, Maura Tierney (I've been saying "chocolate or poop?!" for weeks) and Steve Martin (yes, he's in it, too).

Harold and Kumar Something Something 
Oh Lordy, where to start ... first off, I actually liked the original movie (a lot), and was hoping for something fun in the sequel despite the fact that I find nearly all political humor to be incredibly obvious and unfunny. I hoped that the return of Neil Patrick Harris signaled that there wouldn't be any unsavory homophobic humor and that the movie would be wacky, outlandish, and fun. In reality, this undercooked "satire" is a colossal disappointment wasting the talents of pretty much everyone involved, from leads John Cho and Kal Penn to underused supporting players like Roger Bart, Rob Corddry, and Missi Pyle.

Maybe H&K thinks it's being "edgy" and making fun of homophobia by including lame gay panic gags (forced oral sex in prison, complete with the attempted rapist calling the heroes "fags") and bandying about words like "queers", "fag", and "c*ckmeat sandwich". And if it were done intelligently and with a modicum of skill (like, say, South Park does), I could buy that. But here it's mean-spirited and not very clever, and it will likely make any gay viewer squirm in his seat (on the opposite coast, Michael seemed to have the same reaction that I had). The racist jokes that perforate the rest of the movie are at least making a point about racism, but with the gay jokes the context is missing, and so is the satire. 

Case in point: at the very end of the movie, two gay characters (they show up literally seconds before and stick around for two whole shots) kiss as the punchline to a standard jealousy gag. I'm sure the filmmakers intended this to be a laugh, but the entire audience at the screening I attended actually booed the gay kiss. (and this is New York City!) Why would this be? Maybe because the film sets up any mention of gayness as something to be viewed with scorn? Come on, guys. Let's be a little more careful.

The two high points are Neil Patrick Harris (not just because he's gay, seriously, but because he has legitimate comedic skill ... and a unicorn) and Eric Winter, two gay-friendly actors who don't belong in this crap (likewise Bart ... interestingly, none of these guys is in any of the scenes with the gay jokes, so they likely had no idea they existed). But if you're sensitive to being the butt of a joke and not really up for a handful of close-ups of landscaped vaginas (seriously), you might want to sit this one out. 

Out actor Denis O'Hare is one of the most versatile character actors working today, and also one of the busiest. Currently featured as Travis March, the campaign manager of Rob Lowe in Brothers & Sisters, he's just been cast as one of the leads in the CBS pilot The Tower, as the editor of a Chicago newspaper. (It sounds like a modern Lou Grant, but without the hippie photographer and the bleeding heart reporter who "cares too much".)

Since winning the Tony Award in 2003 for the HOT NAKED GUYS PRETENDING TO SHOWER baseball drama Take Me Out, he's had diverse roles in such high profile projects as A Mighty Heart, Michael Clayton, and Charlie Wilson's War. He's also co-starring in the much anticipated biopic Milk, and the even more anticipated (by me, at least) Cloverfield-ish zombie movie Quarantine.

Denis has been out since high school and yet, defying conventions, has managed to stay a sought-after working actor. Here's hoping the new pilot is picked up, and we get to see more of this multi-talented actor.

In Memoriam: Suzanne Pleshette, 1937-2008

In a continued effort to bring you all that is important in the world of gay entertainment and ensure that you are being spoon-fed images of gorgeous, commoditized manflesh, we present the newly-minted AfterElton Briefs. Following the usual assortment of carefully-selected news items, interested readers can find a refreshing pic of a hot man in underwear after the jump. Yes, we're serious.

• Cheyenne Jackson, Raul Esparza, Dennis O'Hare, Jesse Tyler Ferguson, Mo Rocca and more will be among the sleep-deprived stars performing the 24-Hour Musicals tonight at Joe's Pub. For charity!

• You have to get up pretty early in the morning to beat the Maxim guys at recycling gay jokes from 2004 regarding the sexuality of celebs like Matthew Broderick, Oscar de la Hoya and Hugh Jackman. Damn they're good!

• Here's an interview with Gus van Sant in which he discusses his newest film, Paranoid Park (no mention of Milk, though).

• I Now Pronounce You Razzie-Worthy: Chuck, Larry and company earn Golden Raspberry noms (the low watermark of Hollywood badness) in all major categories except for Worst Actress ... because Kevin James doesn't count.

• Terrence McNally's Corpus Christi, which depicts Jesus as a gay man who gets "Biblical" with Judas and performs a gay marriage, is still causing controversy after nearly a decade (this time in Australia).