"Hawaii Five-0" Bromance Matrix: Giddy Up, Babe!

Sometimes when I'm watching Hawaii Five-0, I ask myself, "Is there anything Steve McGarrett can't do?" And then I punch myself in the face, because how dare I? Just look at last night's episode, for example: McGarrett got all gussied up to meet with the governor; McGarrett trained Lori Weston, a new hire from Homeland Security; McGarrett played big brother to Jenna; McGarrett solved the mystery of a kidnapped teenager; McGarrett chased down a cult leader on horseback. And he still found plenty of time to flirt hang out with his boyfriend Danno.

If McGarrett can do anything, he should be able to dominate our patented Bromance Matrix, no?

1) "Babe," you guys? Really? — Last week I mentioned that Steve and Danny spend an inordinate amount of time talking about what the other one is wearing. Last night they were at it again. Only this time Danny wants to make sure Steve feels the weight of the compliment, so he seasons it with a pet name: "Wow, look at you! You clean up nice, babe!" Later Danny calls him "GQ." Sure, there's a kidnapping sociopath on the loose, but it's important to make time to let your partner know how handsome you think he is. And by "your partner," I mean "your babe," obviously.

2) The old ball and chain — Five-0 leads an assault on a cult compound on horseback. On the drive there, Danny's like, "This is the worst. We should've gotten an ATV." And Steve is like, "Sometimes I feel like you don't appreciate everything I do for you." And Danny's like, "Oh, and how's that different from the way you just take for granted that I'll mount a wild beast if you tell me to?!" And Steve's like, "I work my ass off to be able to provide the best horses for our family!" And then, Lori Weston literally goes, "How long have you two been married?" Danny and Steve don't even correct her.

3) Telepathic gunplay — After a rousing little monologue about how he trusts Five-0 — Danno, especially, obviously — with his life, the team finds themselves involved in another shootout. This time on a ranch, like the bromantic days of yore. Steve and Danny huddle behind a wall for a second to bicker with each other, and then they communicate with their minds (or hearts!) about where to go, and whom to gun down, and how to keep each other safe. They're so dialed in to protecting each other, they leave Lori Weston to fend for herself.

4) Ride 'em cowboy — There's nothing particularly bromantic about Steve's roguish rodeo skills; I just wanted an excuse to post another photo of Alex O'Loughlin on a horse.

What did you think of last night's episode of Hawaii Five-O? What was your favorite bromantic moment?