"A-List: New York" Season 2 Reunion: Part One: "The Gang's Packages"

To celebrate the not-even-close-to long awaited reunion of the A-List: New York cast, I thought I'd invite Doug, a straight friend that I totally did not just make up to entertain myself, over to watch the show with me.

"Who's the drag queen?" Doug asked as the show began.

"That's not a drag queen. That's Wendy Williams. She's an actual woman."

"Dude, really… That's messed up."

Wendy introduces the cast: Mike, Rodiney, Nyasha, Derek Austin, Ryan and Reichen.

Derek has dyed his hair a frightening shade of blonde. He's a Russian accent away from being a Bond villain.

Wendy begins with Nyasha. They show a lowlight reel of her "greatest moments", which includes various fights with Austin, berating assistants, belittling dancers and behaving like a wannabe diva.

Doug looks at me with a question.

"No, that’s not a drag queen either. Though I see why you would think so."

Nyasha has the nerve to claim that gay viewers are discriminating against her for being a woman. “A lot of people didn’t want a woman on a gay show. It’s 2011. That’s so backwards”.

Umm, Dear... It’s not that we couldn’t accept a woman on the show. We just couldn’t accept you.

Derek comes to her defense. "There's a good person inside of her," he laments. "I read what the blogs have written about her. It's horrific."

Could Derek have been reading moi? That’s a rather fun thought.

Wendy turns to Austin and asks, "What were your original thoughts about Nyasha and what are your thoughts now?"

He replies, "Originally, I thought she was a nasty bitch and that's where it stands today."

Reichen and Rodiney’s package is next.

Their package traces their break-up and eventual friendship. When it’s over, Wendy remarks how Reichen seems happier, and sluttier.

"Slutty, how?" Reichen asks.

"Loose."

Suddenly, I’m picturing a hot dog thrown into a hallway. I’ll just leave it at that.

Rodiney’s turn. In nano-seconds, he states that he’s that he’s no longer dating Liza (“It didn’t work out”) then he admits he’d sleep with Nyasha. But two seconds later, he says that he misses guys.

Doug looks confused.

“Rodiney’s bisexual,” I clarify.

“What?”

“Bisexual. It means, unlike you, he doesn’t need a six-pack to get him there.”

“Don’t know what you’re talking about, Bro… You’re not gonna print that, are you?”

“Not even.”

Mike’s package is next. And it sweetly show’s Mike’s awesome and emotional marriage proposal to Martin. When it’s over, Wendy asks about Mike’s supernatural ability to stay clear of the drama.

“I don’t seek it out,” says Mike.

Reichen feels particularly stung and says that remark makes it seem that Mike was, “…looking down on us.”

Now it’s Ryan’s turn. After his package rolls, Wendy asks whether Ryan believes he’s two-faced or just being Switzerland. Ryan says that he never said anything in private that he wouldn’t have said to the other cast members’ faces.

Ryan then talks about Austin’s rollercoaster of a season. In an almost empathetic way, he states…“I’d rather be two-faced than be you this season.”