"Smash" Recap: "Joltin' Joe"

We open this week with Ivy riding on top of Derek in bed. Sweetie, you already got the part, you can stop banging the director. When they're done she wonders if maybe they could get together sometime and actually work on the role. His response of “That's all we're doing, darling” somehow doesn't lead her to slap his face and roll off him. He calls it a joke and promises to set up a rehearsal time.

Eileen is selling off her jewels. She spots a pair of earrings that the jewelry store clerk says were inspired by a pair Marilyn wore in The Seven Year Itch. For fifty bucks Eileen has to have them.

Karen meets Derek for drinks. He explains that with the show being in such an unfinished state they had to go with Ivy because of her greater experience. Karen makes like she's happy to have landed a part in the ensemble but Derek sees through her. He tells her that things can change rapidly in the theatre.

Just then Dev shows up out of nowhere, marking his territory with an inappropriately passionate kiss. He and Derek do the British equivalent of a dick measuring contest, comparing accents and universities.

The Marilyn gang is auditioning actors to play Joe DiMaggio, Arthur Miller and JFK. A nameless assistant notes that one Michael Swift is available to play DiMaggio. Eileen is excited, but Julia is less than thrilled. Derek is unfamiliar with him so Eileen suggests they catch him that night at his Bruno Mars show.

Cut to Michael (Will Chase) onstage performing the Mars song “Grenade”. He's sexy and all despite his unfortunate pseudo-tribal armband tattoo, but the performance rings false for me. It's like he's trying a little too hard.

Eileen and Derek go out for drinks after and Jerry approaches, trying to tempt Derek into My Fair Lady. He spies Eileen's new earrings and asks who bought them for her. This earns him his second drink to the face.