"So You Think You Can Dance" Recap - Katie Holmes and the Final Four

Oh Katie, how do you book these gigs?

I'm not sure Katie Holmes topped her previous utterly useless appearance on So You Think You Can Dance (The one where she performed a totally out of context pre-taped and lip-synced version of "Get Happy"). But last night on the judges' panel she fell almost equally flat.

I'm sure the woman is very sweet and, as my sister remarked last night, she actually seems to get prettier as she gets older. But what the hell? She just rambled on all night with obsequious and often nonsensical comments like... "I loved it when you jumped up" or "I love your outfits. If everyone could dance the way you can in an outfit, boy, fashion would be even more beautiful."

Not a critical or incisive word to say to anyone - making her endless effusive praise sorta meaningless. Kenny Ortega seemed to fare better as a judge, but now that I think about it, he really didn't have a critical word to say either.

As you might have heard, Ortega will be directing a remake of Dirty Dancing. Was it just me, or were they sort of pimping out Melanie as a possible "Baby?" Sending out a trial balloon as it were. Ortega went on and on about "what a great actress she is" and how he'd "stand in line" to work with her. And when Cat Deeley prodded him about whether there'd be a part for Melanie in the movie he coyly said, "there just might be."

If the part he had in mind was just a minor background character, why were they shilling Melanie for that and not, say Sasha, Marko or Tadd?

For what it's worth, I think Melanie (assuming she can act) would make a great Baby. She's got the sweetness and the innocence down pat. She just needs to grow that hair out a little.

But on to last night's performances, which were kind of disappointing on the whole.

Things kicked off with a pretty weak disco number from Doriana Sanchez. Melanie and Marko (particularly Marko) looked tired and out of sorts. I really thought the judges were going to rip the performance, but they mostly gave it a pass.

Also pretty weak was a Broadway number by Spencer Liff featuring Sasha as a femme fatale and Marko as either a busboy, or Jerry Lewis. Not quite sure what he was going for. It wasn't all that terrible, but Nigel really went in for the kill and singled out Marko for criticism.

There was a lousy Cha Cha danced by Sasha and Tadd and choreographed by Mark Ballas. Mary and Nigel also heavily criticized that one. But for me the absolute nadir of the evening was the final performance: Tadd and Marko doing a "Gumboot Stepping" routine. I have no idea what that is, but I'm pretty sure it's supposed to be done with a crowd of thirty or so. Just having two guys on the stage like that - well it looked sort of pitiful and was a terrible way to end the night.

That means that three of Marko's four partner performances were slop. I thought he might have an outside chance to win this thing since he's always been an audience favorite - but not after last night.

Tadd too is out of the running. In fact, after their Gumboot Stepping Nigel pretty much gave both guys their walking papers. "Thanks for participating, we have some nice parting gifts for you, don't let the door hit you on the way out."

Aside from the solo performances (which were all pretty strong) there were three really great numbers last night:

The first was Sasha partnered with All-Star (And all Sex-on-a-Stick) Mark Kanemura for a dark Sonya Tayeh contemporary routine. Damn, but Kanemura is fine. He and Sasha looked gorgeous together.

The second was provided by a new choreographer named Tessandra Chavez. It had Marko partnered with last year's winner Lauren Froderman. They too were a perfect match. I hope we see more of Tessandra's choreography next season.

Next page... Last night's most intriguing performance!