"The Secret Circle" SnapCap: “Heather, Why Do You Have to be Such a Mega-Witch?”

Previously on The Secret Circle, we learned that Heather Barnes, whom the circle believed had been killed in the same boatyard fire that killed their parents, was instead supposedly subjected to a fate worse than death by Amelia, Cassie's mother. Cassie and Adam go off to East Lima Heights Adjacent (with Diana's consent) to speak with Heather's brother Wade at his serial killer hideout. They learn that Heather hasn't moved in 16 years, since the night of the fire. Which means she was completely oblivious to the George W. Bush administration, so something of a mixed blessing. Heather suddenly gasps and grabs ahold of Cassie's arm and screams “Help me, Veronica! The afterlife is so boring! If I have to sing Kumbaya one more time...” The guys pull Heather off but not before Cassie spots a mark on Heather's wrist.

Back at the car, Adam helpfully exposits that the mark is a sigil, a magical mark. They drive to Cassie's place where Cassie shows Adam her family's Book of Shadows. They leaf through it and find the sigil, determining that it's a “suppression spell”. There's a recipe for a poultice to break it so they head for the abandoned house to mix it. They need Cassie's blood to complete the poultice. She's squeamish, so Adam gives her a prick—with a needle to her finger but it's shot as every bit of the metaphorical boning that it is.

Diane catches them magicking each other yet again but plays the understanding girlfriend yet again and checks out Cassie's Book. Diana refuses to help break the spell and refuses to allow Adam to help either. Accompanied by the faint sound of a cat's meow and a cracking whip, Adam follows Diana out.

Faye has no such compunctions and when she wanders into the abandoned house in between rounds of screwing with everyone else's heads, she quickly agrees to help in exchange for the chance to thumb through Cassie's...Book. They return to East Lima Heights Adjacent and, when Wade leaves his murder shack, they sneak in and cast the counter-spell. Nothing happens. Wade returns and they sneak out and as Wade settles in for the night we see OMG A SNAKE CRAWLING UNDER HEATHER'S SKIN!

Heather soon awakens to Wade's initial delight, which delight quickly turns to unconsciousness after Heather slams him through a wall. Hey Heather, that man has wiped your ass every day for the last sixteen years, show some gratitude! Heather makes her way to Cassie's house (which she remembers as Amelia's house). Cassie hears noises downstairs and, leaving Faye alone with her Book of Shadows (bad idea...terrible idea) she investigates. She finds Heather, asking for Amelia. Cassie tells her that Amelia's dead and Heather's all, “Veronica, why are you pulling my dick?” Heather exposits that on the night of the fire she was trying to help Amelia get Cassie out of town but “they” tried to use Amelia's power. And by “they” she means demons which manifest as OMG SNAKES CRAWLING UNDER HER SKIN! The demon possessing Heather sends her into convulsions, then attacks Cassie, knocking her out.

Luckily, Diana remembers seeing the sigil on Heather's wrist in her own Book of Shadows and quickly susses out what's going on. Adam calls Cassie and Faye answers, but while they're on the phone Heather comes after her. Adam and Diana head for Cassie's place, as do Nick and Monica when they spot Faye being attacked through the window. The full circle is assembled and...they stand around and do nothing while Heather runs off. Wade drives up and spots Heather, and as she runs from him she's hit by a passing car. Well, that was anti-climactic. I thought the motorist was Charles for a second but, like every other parental or authority figure, he was absent from this episode.

As Wade screams out “I love my dead, demon-possessed sister!” the coroner takes Heather's body away. I was expecting some sort of zombification but instead OMG A SNAKE CRAWLS OUT OF AN OPEN WOUND! And I have to say, I am sick of these motherf*ckin' snakes on this motherf*ckin plane of existence! The demon snake crawls into Nick's jacket pocket.

On the non-mystical side, Faye tries to tank Nick and Melissa's relationship by setting Melissa up to see Nick talking with another girl outside the Peach Pit, but by episode's end Melissa has seen through that nonsense. She and Nick reconcile but OMG THAT SNAKE JUST CRAWLED INTO HER EAR!

We'll be charting some different metrics this week; to wit:

ANGST: Cassie spends the first half of the episode consumed with guilt over what her mother did to Heather. Then she spends the second half of the episode consumed with guilt about freeing Heather overlaid with terror because OMG SNAKES CRAWLING UNDER HEATHER'S FACE! And, her teen-angst bullshit now has a body count. Adam endures his usual dose of silent suffering from being torn between two lovers. Faye of course feels no shame as she merrily wreaks minor havoc on everyone else's lives.

FRENEMIES INDEX: Faye totally flips the script this week, going from “Boy you better treat my girl Melissa right” at Nick after the dance to “Girl, that boy is a lyin' cheatin' dog” at Melissa at the Peach Pit. She is so setting Melissa up for a LUG scenario. Diana is not at all pleased that Adam is once again doing “magic” with another girl and whips him away but she was totally right to do it, because Diana is always right about everything.

BEEFCAKE: Sadly, while Nick could be briefly glimpsed pulling a shirt on this week, the only shirt that came off was Melissa's.

HEX APPEAL: But she and Nick whammied it off button by button which was pretty cool. Faye and Melissa whammied Faye's lock again meaning Faye can go another week too lazy to learn the combination. Surprisingly, despite the presence of the entire circle, 'twas a late model 4x4 that killed the beast.